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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To Think Stupid Woman Lovely Man

277 replies

Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 21:40

Driving home this evening son ASD/OCD, mum heart disease disabled, and the tyre goes as flat as a pancake. I was on a country road so I pull into a village and park up in a safe place. Village idiot (woman) says "your car smells like it is burning"

"I have a flat" I reply.

"So you do" she says. Then says "can you move your car it's on the road outside my house". No drive, just a road, no yellow lines, nothing, but my car had the audacity to come to a halt outside her house.

I asked not in a nasty tone but more one of bewilderment if she is joking, she then looks embarrassed.

Another man from the same village came out and me being a dumb ass woman and ashamed to admit I can't change a tyre on MN, changed it for me then didn't want the £20 I was trying to give him for helping. He did take it as we were so grateful. Having him helping helped keep my son calm, and made sure we all got home in one piece.

He was absolutely lovely, happy to help, a true gent. I haven't had help with my car since I was a size 10 and wearing skirts that my Mum called pelmets.

Son is very shaken, doesn''t cope well with things out of the norm but if it wasn't for the lovely man he'd be in a terrible state now.

But we're home (obviously) am I being unreasonable to think the woman was a silly moo to ask me to move my broken down gilloppy when it had a flat and the man was a true gent and happy to help me, my Mum and son on our way?

OP posts:
joric · 16/08/2011 21:51

YABU- Her behaviour seemed odd and inappropiate. This 'village idiot' or 'silly moo' may have a mental disability. Who knows.

choclatelickurs · 16/08/2011 21:54

maybe the woman has the same condition as your son

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 21:55

She could have, I don't know but that could be said of many people who have hang ups about people who park outside their properties.

I wasn't rude to her, I was too concerned about getting us all home and keeping son in particular calm. Why am I being unreasonable if I didn't tell her she was a silly moo or the village idiot but kept my opinions to myself?

OP posts:
DogsBestFriend · 16/08/2011 21:56

Sounds to me she was just a silly moo who thinks that she owns the road outside her house. There's a lot of 'em about.

Bless that kind man, I'm glad you were helped and that it made life easier for DS.

Now get thee to a basic car maintainence course fast, missus! :o

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 21:56

choc she might which is why my opinions are only being shared anonymously on a website. Whats wrong with that?

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 16/08/2011 21:57

There is always someone upsetting you, isnt there Confused.

You had managed to drive to the village.. so a few more feet to get away from her house wouldnt have done any more damage than you have already done.

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 21:58

Dogs I am seriously embarrassed, I couldn't change the flipping tyre. What a numpty!! You know what, I think I will do just that.

For years I've had company cars and you just call the garage and they send you out a new car, I forget those days are just memories now. Confused

OP posts:
itisnearlysummer · 16/08/2011 22:00

Tbh, I think YprobablyABU.

"village idiot" (according to the font of all knowledge that is Wikipedia) is "a stereotype of the mentally disabled" and also "the village idiot was treated as an acceptable form of deranged individual".

Maybe she was just being a bit snippy, but I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate it if someone were to refer to your DS as the "village idiot" because his behaviour didn't make sense to them.

Nice.

K999 · 16/08/2011 22:01

You pulled over in a safe place. Doubt I would have attempted to move the car because someone was upset that I parked outside their home. I'd be more inclined to offer help. Smile

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 22:02

squeaky I do apologise my car came to a halt where it shouldn't perfectly legally and perfectly safely. So whip me to within an inch of my life. Hmm

It wouldn't have been a few more feet I'd have had to find another safe spot to park. She said she had to carry stuff to her friends car so I offered to have my son carry it for her. She did look embarrassed it was a buggy!

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 16/08/2011 22:03

so I offered to have my son carry it for her

This would be your son who was upset at the time??

joric · 16/08/2011 22:04

You asked if YWBU to think stupid woman, lovely man.

I answered YABU to think stupid woman, lovely man.

The reason i think YABU is that this woman may have responded so inappropriately due to a mental disability. It's hard to judge.

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 22:04

K999 I'd have done the car more damage by driving it on the rim, to be fair she did look suitably embarrassed when I asked if she was joking.

OP posts:
worraliberty · 16/08/2011 22:05

What does 'heart disease disabled' mean?

My Dad has HD and so did my Mum so I'm interested to know what it actually means?

K999 · 16/08/2011 22:06

At least you got the help you needed. It's crap feeling stranded and I sympathise as I drive but wouldn't know how to change a tyre either!

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 22:06

squeaky the lovely man helped to keep my son calm as he saw someone who knew what he was doing was in control of the situation, later he fell apart. At the time we first broke down in the car he was still calm and getting him to help the said lady would not have been a problem for him.

OP posts:
choclatelickurs · 16/08/2011 22:07

would you mind if you son had a "Turn" and someone slagged him off on an internet forum? it would be anonymous after all

Alibabaandthe80nappies · 16/08/2011 22:09

Mitmoo you do seem to get in a lot of rows Grin

joric · 16/08/2011 22:09
Hmm
Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 22:10

Worra she has heart disease, it is disabling for her, she can't breathe well, struggles to get into and out of cars, can't walk very far, breathless on slight exertion, has slight brain damage from prior heart attacks due to lack of oxygen to the brain while they were rescusitating her, get confused very easily, gets agitated etc. In my mums case it is disabling.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 22:10

alibaba I didn't get into a row. Confused I kept my thoughts to myself.

OP posts:
worraliberty · 16/08/2011 22:12

Oh right thanks...sorry to hear that though.

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 22:14

choc sadly it happens even when people know he has autism. I can't diagnose her on a meeting in a street, I can however comment on the inappropriateness of her unreasonable demands.

K999 I am so going to have to learn how to do it. I can decorate, tile, clear drains (simple silt stuff) but when it comes to the car I have no interest.

notes to self get on that basic car DIY course.

OP posts:
2shoes · 16/08/2011 22:16

the man sounds lovely. shame that you were so horrid about the woman.

Original poster
Mitmoo · 16/08/2011 22:16

worra No worries, she has had heart disease for years but now I suppose I have to accept it is end stages but I don't want to admit that. I prefer to think she has so many spare parts that she is bionic and indestructable. Grin

OP posts:
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