On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining - new thread for summer 2024

[Bigbus]

@amdone123 @touty @coppergate7 @swannyb
@Hohofortherobbers @YoghurtPotWashingMachine @Mj20 @Freezingfeetwarmheart @Needtokickthehabit @OhShitImNearly40 @Nowstrong @enoughisenough4

The last thread got full before a new one could be started. I’ve tried to tag some of the regular posters but I don’t really know what I’m doing! Let me know if this works and please tag people I’ve missed.

@Mj20, are you there, or rather, here ?!!

@Amdone123 yay! Ty hun! Knew I could rely on you xxx

@Mj20 no worries. How have you been? All good here. I've been managing 4 or 5 days af, then having either 1 x wine and a few beers or 2 x wine. OK, overall though.

Well done for not giving in to the temptation @Amdone123!

I did the same last night as the night before - started with the AF mojito and then had two glasses of wine after dinner.

Going to try to stay totally AF tonight. But I’m pissed off with DH today so God knows how the day will go…..

@Peridot1 that's great, just 2 glasses. Can't help with the dh situation but I hear you ! ( except to say, drinking might just make you feel worse 🤣).

I really need to not drink today and tomorrow, especially tomorrow as I'm out all day Saturday with my granddaughters and a hangover will not be pleasant.

@Amdone123 ty for helping me to find my way back 🤣 as I often dip in and out I usually just pick up where I left off but couldn’t find you guys at all and felt a bit panicky 🤣

Im really well ty…. Currently 15 days A/f…. No big event that sparked it but basically the units were creeping back at the weekends…. I was starting to notice little patterns again…. Smoking, texting on my phone all night, and I thought I don’t want to do this anymore. It’s like something has clicked and I’ve gone ok this moderating doesn’t work for me, I’m best off sober… so that’s where I am. I know I can do it as I did months before but I think this time I need to see it as a life style change forever. Not just seeing how far I get.

I read back an old post where me and @NextPhaseOfLife of life were discussing moderating after I’d drunk too much at a wedding and was racked with anxiety and I just thought… I’m happier without the moderating maths! Yet at the time I was still clinging to this idea of just having one or two. But in my hearts of hearts even one or 2 really affects me the next day! So what’s the point!

I’ve noticed my mental health is greatly improved already. I’ve implemented a few other things at the same time (less phone, more books etc) and it’s all working out nicely!

@Amdone123 it sounds like your doing so well at moderating. You were always good at knowing your limit etc! How is everyone else? Where are you all in your journeys @Bigbus @Needtokickthehabit @Freezingfeetwarmheart @NextPhaseOfLife @Swannyb @Liverpool52 @enoughisenough4

have just tagged names I recognise but would love to hear how everyone’s doing!
so glad to be back xxxxx

@Mj20 that's great 15 days af, well done. I understand what you're saying regarding moderating. I would love to abstain completely but I can't. Unless I go down the Antabuse route, and I've done some more research on that, that is quite frankly, scary.
Great attitude too, regarding a lifestyle change and not 'seeing how far I can get'. Because that's what's needed really.
Have to go have my hair cut, so laters, folks, and good to have you back on board @Mj20

@Mj20 thanks for the tag and nice to hear from you. Well done on Day 15!

I have been reading everyone’s posts and good to hear of all the successes and so glad that people still feel
able to come and post when things are not going so well. Glad to here you are managing better @Needtokickthehabit and well done @OhShitImNearly40 for three weeks!

I am away on holiday so having a few drinks each day. I’m still entering all my units on Drink Aware but it’s a bit depressing on holiday because even moderating - just a few glasses a day adds up every day. I was tempted to have a holiday from it but still keeping going. We’re travelling about quite a lot so hangovers would be no fun!

So back to a good mindset and a healthy future. I cannot even explain the stress I have been under but I have gotten it over and done with and now I don't NEED a crutch. Now it is a choice of wanting it. Now I start to moderate as honesty too afraid to go cold turkey but I will do it.

@Bigbus I know that feeling! I'm sure I'm more sensible on holiday ( nowadays anyway) because the thought of being ill in a different setting scares me. At home, I can just flop into bed.
@Needtokickthehabit you can do it. Keep posting here and remember one day at a time.

I've had a strange week - been really hyper and energetic. Drank Monday and last night so I've not even managed my usual 5 days. Never mind. I'm trying and I'm sure next week will be better.
I know I'll drink tomorrow. After that, I think I'll take my own advice and take it one day at a time.

Morning all! Not doing too well here. Was moderating well, but now it's wine every evening. Can't even manage 1 AF day. So mad and disappointed with myself. Will try to pick myself up and give myself a good talking to.

@Nowstrong we're in the same boat. Strange how sometimes I can abstain relatively easily, even weekends, and other times it's all I can think of.

As predicted last night wasn’t AF. Was pissed off at DH all day and vice versa. Proper argument which culminated in him out strimming the driveway in the rain to make a point. 🙄😂

We made up over wine. Our whole relationship is pretty much based on wine!

@Peridot1 🤣.
What are your plans regarding weekend and wine?

It won’t be AF @Amdone123! It’s the Mon-Thurs drinking I want to reduce/stop. I’m happy to drink at the weekend. Will try to be aware though and moderate.

@Mj20 you found us! Although I’ve been quite absent from the thread for a while too. Things have been going well for me alcohol wise, until yesterday - one glass somehow lead to 4 bottles between 3 and a late night pizza order!

I can’t undo it now so I have decided how I respond to it is what matters and I’m having a healthy day!

I am still yet to have a proper hangover this year and needless to say, I’m super pleased and proud of this as it was my goal for 2024.

Look forward to reading everyone else’s updates!

Morning all!
really enjoying coming on and reading all the updates again, and as @Bigbus says this group is so good for sharing the highs and lows, and I’ve certainly been both sides of the coin over the years!!!!

Ticking along here nicely. Still no desire to drink, day 17! I always forget how quickly the days rack up once double digits are reached. I suppose this weekend is easy as OH is away and I’d never drink alone. All in all feeling positive!!!!

At @Amdone123 and @Nowstrong hope your both ok. You’ll get back into the groove before you know it, and I always think the same….. so strange how sometimes it just clicks and other times it doesn’t, just goes to show how complex it all is! Happy holidays @Bigbus, sounds like your moderating well!

@Needtokickthehabit im pleased to hear your stressful situation is resolved and your feeling better about things and ready to moderate. Hope you’re ok too @Peridot1 after the row…. The vision of your husband made me chuckle! Wine does always help with the make up 🤣

Hi @Swannyb i missed your message initially! Great to reconnect after all this time! Sounds like your doing amazingly, no hangovers this year is a triumph! Well done xxx

@Mj20 - it was funny! But was a win as the row was about the state of the driveway and it’s done now. He finished it yesterday and I even helped! It’s a long driveway and our neighbours have access to get to their house and I knew they thought it was a state too. We went out with them last night - down the new tidy driveway - and they were pretty pleased with it too.

Not AF last night as predicted. Had a nice impromptu night in the village pub with neighbours. Too much wine consumed but really enjoyed the evening.

Also had an impromptu night with the neighbours last night. We were up until 4am and must have had 2 bottles each. Safe to say I feel like shit today. I was supposed to be having my hair cut this afternoon but I had to cancel it and now I'll still have to pay, and have rebooked for a really inconvenient time 🤦‍♀️

@Peridot1 and @enoughisenough4 are you guys neighbours? 😂

Evening. Have had 2 glasses of wine. I know that's not too much, fighting off the desire to have a third. But I know I'm going to lose. It's been a shitty day. Don't really know why. Just feel bad. Can't stop eating. Not vast amounts. A piece of bread here, an ice-cream there, a couple of chocolates, that I don't really like.
All that after meditation and being really active, just can't relax. Am actively looking for the off switch. I know I'm going to have that 3rd glass. That means my rule "no solo drinking" has been kicked to the curb. Was drinking AF fizzy drinks until 19H00.
Why? Why am I so intent in sabotaging myself?
Well. Going to have that 3rd glass and get it over and done with. Then bed.
Hopefully, tomorrow will be better. Perhaps a new start?
Wishing you all well.

@Nowstrong hope you're feeling OK this morning. It's maybe just a bump in the road.. I think we all have them.
@Bigbus good detective skills there 🤣.

I drank yesterday. A lot. And I smoked. I've got an appointment for a routine lung check for the over 50s.
I'm hoping the results scare me, and motivate me to quit. I only smoke when I'm drinking wine 😡

Morning all! @Amdone123 , yep bump in the road. I see that you're not doing too good either. Don't even think of a health scare. Just stay off the wine (yeah, yeah, I know). We can do this, but thing is, I'm not sure what. Stay strong. Hope you don't feel too crappy today.
WI woke up this morning feeling a lot better. Jumped on the scales, they must love me for doing that first thing, fat weight going down, muscle weight going up. So I'm feeling more motivated. Nearly back to my normal self. Will see this evening how I manage being AF.
Watched a crappy series on Netflix last night and gosh were they chucking the alcohol down their throats! I'm a small player next to them. But it got my "holier than thou" attitude out of the cupboard and I had a lot of water.
Off to the pool for some sort of aqua gym. It will get the fight back into me and the negative thoughts out.
Still trying to analyse my need to "fill" myself with food or alcohol yesterday and the previous days to a lesser extent. I thought I had grown out of my oral stage in life. Better rethink it all...
Wishing you all a lovely Sunday.

Morning, not really been checking in here as the moderating wasn't going too well - I had my birthday and a poorly cat in the same week amd a week off work - so I celebrated my birthday every day, drank as worried about the cat, drank again to celebrate cat surviving surgery (she is old and diabetic and hyperthyroid so a lot of risks!).... back on it now though, as after the week of so much drinking I felt awful - tired, bloated, headache, throbbing kidneys.

Last week I only has 3 drinks on total for the whole week, proud of that! DH jas downloaded the Try Dry app and we are both aiming to only drink on two days a week at the most - we really are bad influences on each other so it helps that we're both on the same page.