Mindfulness, Moderating and Not Texting In The Kitchen !

[Amdone123]

Morning all..hope you're all ok. Well I had busy weekend. I didn't quite stick to my plans : I drank Friday evening ( didn't eat), and drank last night, too. I don't feel great today but I am looking forward to having a break. I know I want to get back to being af and all its benefits.
I was thinking that I am able to stay in and not drink. My next step will be going out and not going mad !

Great you found the session helpful @amdone123, sorry you're feeling down @mj20, as you say treat yourself to an early night and tomorrow is another day. I'm dry tonight, day 7 in Sept.

@Hohofortherobbers, that's good day 7. Keep going !

I totally fell off the wagon last night. Had about a bottle and a half of wine and fell asleep on the couch.

Feeling a bit sorry for myself today. It's a lovely day outside and I feel like crap.

Going to keep that crossroads thing in mind from now on @Amdone123

Hope you're feeling better @Mj20

Good luck everyone and here's to a sober night tonight!

@youboozeyoulose, don't beat yerself up. Just keep trying. Today will be hard maybe but we live n learn. I was just looking through my phone and saw a selfie from when I was hungover....jeez ! I look terrible. My vanity is probably enough to keep me on the straight n narrow! Yeah, the crossroads thing is powerful. So glad you can use it.

Hi all. Ty @Amdone123 @youboozeyoulose @Hohofortherobbers! I’m feeling much better thank you all! The good nights sleep really helped and then I was up and out bright and early for a dog walk! I’m day 5 after my moderated weekend and am planning an a/f weekend!
Well done for all the moderating and effort from everyone.
@youboozeyoulose try not to dwell- I know it’s hard and how crap you feel but you can’t change it now so be kind to yourself and move on!
Here’s to a great day for us all xxx

Hi, can I join you guys please? I don't drink every day but when I do drink it is a minimum of a bottle of wine, then feel tired & sluggish the day after plus don't sleep well. Last week was a wake up call because I drank wine Tues - Sat and drank a little other alcohol on Sunday - so at least 5 bottles of wine plus gin/cider/beer on top. I felt so run down & ill. I normally start drinking between 5pm - 6pm and go to bed about 9 as the wine makes me tired, but I wake up between 2am - 4am wide awake.
I haven't had wine since Saturday and no alcohol at all since Sunday - I'm sleeping better and feel less anxious!
Long term I'd like to cut down to a bottle of wine a week and at least 4 alcohol free days. This weeks plan is af Mon-Thurs and a few drinks (not wine) on Fri & Sat.
Sorry for rambling on, it wasn't until Sunday that I realised how bad my drinking has got! Wine is my downfall!

@Gemzee, of course you can join. Hi 👋and welcome. You sound a lot like me. And most of the posters on this thread actually so you're in good company. We're all trying to lead healthier lifestyles whether moderating or abstaining.
You sound like you've got a plan so that's great. If you have a wobble or want to share anything including successes, pop on here as we all find listening to each other really motivating.
It's a slippery slope isn't it? One day you're enjoying a glass or 2, next minute it's your best mate ! ( it's not mine any longer. We've gone NC !! )

Welcome @Gemzee!!!! I joined this post after being invited by OP @Amdone123
Although I usually moderate (ish) sometimes I take it too far and then have terrible anxiety! Being a part of this thread has helped me so much just to be mindful!!!! And my drinking habits are improving so much! We’ve all got different goals but collectively as @Amdone123 said we are just trying to lead healthier lifestyles! Without hangovers!!!! Look forwarding to sharing your journey!! Congrats on 5 days af xx

Thanks, happy to have people to chat to It's 4 days (inc today) AF as I did drink Sunday (1 cider & 1.5 Coronas - threw half of one away).
Definitely not drinking tonight!
Very likely will tomorrow though as it's Fri and my son is with his uncle/auntie & cousins overnight. Planning no wine though.

Hi @Gemzee! Nice to have someone else on board.

Hello! I hope you don't mind me adding this message. I recently wrote a book with my friend to support people moderate their drinking. We've had our own issues with it. ('Alcohol Reconsidered - Education for Moderation). It's probably best suited for those pretty new to moderation and we look at the history, science and impact of alcohol as well as some moderation tips. I'd be happy to give away some free PDF versions if anyone is interested? If so, please feel free to email me Lesley [email protected] We really aren't anti-alcohol so it's not suitable for anyone who wants to give it up for good.

@AR77 I have emailed you, thank you

deezer.page.link/C7DjVw5vsKXprVDg6

Dunno if that link will work as it is on Deezer which I pay monthly for but its an episode of a podcast I listened to earlier. James Morris The Alcohol Problem podcast episode 1 talking to Adian Chiles about drinking in moderation rather than abstaining. I'm sure its available wherever you get podcasts.

@AR77 I have emailed you too. Thanks :)

I've emailed copies. Hope it helps. Programme with Adrian Chiles is really good IMO. There's also a podcast with Professor David Nutt on Drug Science. It's quite old now but it's really worth a listen. Particularly good if you've ever felt a bit guilty about your drinking...as I did...

Just downloaded the David Nutt podcast (alcohol episode) thanks
Much reading & listening to do. I'm really determained to be a moderate drinker, I can do this!

Hello All!
Good news...I had a stressful day at work and DID NOT turn to the wine, or even consider it!!
Will read through, and catch up...

@Buntyforgirls, yay !!!!! That is brilliant news ! Well done. What did you do instead? When a friend of mine is stressed and tempted to drink, she'll shout, ' Do not tell me to have a bath or write a gratitude journal!!' It always makes me laugh. I admit I need to think of other ways to relieve stress. I had a wobble yesterday at work simply because someone said the weather was going to be good today. That's all it takes sometimes. Anyway, I did my breathing and asked did I really want a hangover Saturday morning when I've planned a hike through the woods with my sister? No.
Even this morning I thought fridays are tricky. I have a houseful in the morning - a couple of relatives and their children. It's a mad house. When they go, I used to have a glass or 2 to decompress. This morning I thought when they go, I'm having a bath, doing some self care and am chuffed to be on Day 13.
Have a great day everyone. Taking it off the table is definitely working for me. At the moment I don't want any af substitutes either. No mental gymnastics = headache free.

@buntyforgirls thats great!!!!
I didn't drink last night either so thats 4 AF days this week. I have a planned drinking night tonight - just want to avoid wine!
This is the first week I haven't bought wine on my Asda delivery - I only have 1 bottle in the house, which would normally make me feel a bit panicky (not sure why, as I have 2 shops in walking distance open till late) but I feel fine with this

@Gemzee, well done. You're doing really well. I think not buying it, not having it in the house, is key. I can't have it in the house in the same way my sister can't have chocolate in the house. Willy Won't would be proud of my cupboards, yet chocolate doesn't bother me at all.
So, are you having the 1 bottle this evening and that's it ?

That supposed to be Willy Wonka!!

@amdone123 No I'm not having wine this weekend, as it's the first week of moderating I am going to drink either cider, gin or vodka (I seem to be able to control myself on these but wine I can't!).

Oh yes, sorry you did say in your earlier posts that you were avoiding wine !
I'm the same with wine. Most people I know are. I can have a couple of beers or gins and stop. Wine, not so much.

Afternoon everyone, hope you're all ok and soaking up the last of the rays before Autumn. I've had a great week, been really on top of things. I'm day 14 today. Having the odd thought / craving but am rolling with it and not fighting it as the coach advised. If I fought it, I think the wine witch could win so best just to accept it.
Does anyone know the difference between a thought and a craving? Or are they the same?
I've lost 4.5lb this week so am pleased. I've had the odd thought like I say but the thought of hangover immediately follows. This never happened before the therapy so that's interesting to me. Before I never gave a thought to the hangover. I should have as they were so bloody painful.
I'm out tomorrow for a meal with my dh. No plans to drink. I want to get to end of October then I'm halfway to 100 days. I want to do it badly. I'm a bit of a perfectionist though and worried that if I do succumb, I've failed. But I know that's stupid. One day at a time I think !!
Have a lovely Saturday evening, folks !

Hi all!
Hope your all having a successful weekend whether your a/f or moderating!
I decided to moderate after saying I was going a/f…. Had two red wines Friday, then a g and t Saturday and a red wine!!!
That’s me done for the weekend! Felt good and fully in control but have noticed my sleep has been brilliant! It only takes a little bit to disrupt my sleep 🙄 @Amdone123 your doing brilliant! Is the weight loss a result of being booze free or are you also trying??? Xxx