Mindfulness, Moderating and Not Texting In The Kitchen !

[Amdone123]

Morning all..hope you're all ok. Well I had busy weekend. I didn't quite stick to my plans : I drank Friday evening ( didn't eat), and drank last night, too. I don't feel great today but I am looking forward to having a break. I know I want to get back to being af and all its benefits.
I was thinking that I am able to stay in and not drink. My next step will be going out and not going mad !

Morning all. @Mj20, thanks. I'm feeling good. The weight loss is due to both really. I've always said if I didn't drink I'd be 9st as my diet is generally healthy. I don't snack or eat rubbish ordinarily. The only time I eat rubbish is when I'm hungover. I'm aiming for 20lbs by Xmas, which is realistic. Well done for your moderating, that's really good what you had. I was thinking I could have a beer today if I wanted but it doesn't give me that much pleasure so I think I'll just abstain. Glad you're sleeping better. I am too. I used to be awake with little niggles/ anxieties even when not drinking but I've been listening to the meditation and it does help me to put it into perspective.

I drank 4 vodkas on Friday and 5 gins yesterday so not great but I went to bed not feeling drunk and I slept through both nights - so a huge improvement from when I was drinking wine.
I am undecided about drinking today ... I probably will.
Thankful for my 4 AF days so far this week though and feel my ways of thinking about alcohol are changing. My anxiety seems to be improving and I haven't missed wine.
Probably drank too much but I still feel positive and a little proud of myself
Well done to everyone else!

Newbie here. Been looking on the dry thread but not sure I am ready to quit forever but I do want to quit for a bit and then try to moderate so hoping to join this thread.

Realised last night that my moderation switch that I used to have has gone as I just want to keep drinking when I start. The room spinning last night made me realise I can't keep doing this anymore so chucked the alcohol down the sink this morning to start I hope a dry reset period.

@Gemzee, well you should feel proud of yourself. You've recognised the problem and are doing something about it. Maybe you feel you did drink too much but Rome wasn't built in a day. I think there is a gradual realisation and change of mindset. I think it's good also that you recognise you might drink today. If you do it's not the end of the world, just start some af days tomorrow. @ANewToday, hi 👋and welcome! It's scary to think it's forever isn't it? I used to be terrified of that prospect but gradually I'm thinking I'm more terrified of hangovers twice a week and shortening my life !! I have a Moderation switch ( sometimes. It depends who I'm with. And where I am. So with my dh I can moderate but not with my ds / friends). Well done for pouring it away. I've done that a few times. It feels quite empowering. Do you have any plans or are you taking one day at a time? Do you drink wine or are you ok with other drinks? I only want wine really. No other drink has the same effect. I can have a gin or 2 but don't really enjoy it. There might as well just be tonic in the glass.

Thanks for the welcome

I drink wine or beer and can't moderate with either. Last night was both and I think that pushed me over the edge.

The forever bit is what I am nervous off because if I do that with food when I used to diet it would make me crave it even more and I don't want to go there.

DH is thinking of not drinking as well as he is finding the moderation harder so that will help. But he is much better than me and generally stops before he feels drunk.

I just need to find a drink that hits the spot. I like AF beer so I just need to work on reaching for that as there is only so much tea/juice I can stomach in the evenings.

@ANewToday, oh yeah, definitely. The minute we say we're not having something, there it is ! Pulling us in !! You don't have to give it up forever, just cut back and see how you go.
There's a great thread on here about af drinks. It's really useful. I love af perroni ( tesco. Think it's £4 for 4. It's lovely. And af kopperberg). Af wine is awful. There's a niche in the market for any budding entrepreneurs out there.

Actually I only had 4 gins yesterday but did have 1 cider - so 5 drinks. It still makes me feel clearer headed than wine and much less tired. I need to work on not drinking as much but do feel proud of my 4 AF days.
Its definitely something to keep working at 😊 Its only the first week.
Just realised I haven't gone a week without wine since Jan 2020 (until this week!) so thats a big deal too I guess!

Also yes omg Alcohol free wine is disgusting! Tried some when I was pregnant! Horrible stuff!
I like Appletizer and apple juice a lot when I was pregnant - not drank it since though.

AF wine is awful I agree. Just been for a walk to clear the head.

DH thinks I should only drink when out because we don't go out much (maybe every couple of weeks) and then have no more than 2 drinks. Might be a good plan but at the moment I think I just need a break from it all.

@ANewToday, yeah, just have a break from it and then evaluate. We've been out today. I had no intention to drink but the food looked so lovely and we were in such a good mood, we ordered a bottle of prosecco. I had 2 flutes, dh 1 and we left the rest (£18 a bottle!), but I thought I can either sit here and finish it for the sake of it or leave it. Had a lovely day, did some shopping. I can stop now. If I could do it like this all the time, I wouldn't have a problem!

Amdone123 I would have found leaving the Prosecco hard due to the cost which is daft so well done and glad you had a lovely day.

Morning all ! It's like winter here, freezing. Works for me as I'm less likely to want ice cold wine in the cold. I definitely veer towards hot chocolate ! Am looking forward to this week and being af. I enjoyed my day yesterday but equally I enjoyed last week and not drinking. I'm going to do Monday to Friday af and eating properly and on Saturday not necessarily drink but see how I feel. If we eat out for example I could have 1 or 2 again. Am not seeing it as a reward as such because that's a dangerous way of thinking for me. I'd rather begin to think of a reward as not putting poison in meh !
Have a great, af day folks, whatever you're doing.

Well done for leaving the Prosecco! I don't think I could have done that having paid that much!
I had 2 ciders at lunchtime yesterday as I had a friend over who I don't see often, we sat in the sun watching our kids play - it was very relaxing. I then had 2 vodkas in the evening which to be honest, I didn't really need or overly enjoy. I made myself a 3rd vodka but poured it away when I went to bed - not sure why I even made it to be honest.
So I drank Fri - Sun last week but wasn't drunk at any point, my anxiety has improved and I'm sleeping better (which I know seems odd because I still drank alcohol but I swear it's the wine - or the amount of wine - that affects my sleep), plus my head seems clearer.

Plan this week is alcohol free Mon-Thurs again, I am out with my work colleagues on Friday so probably will be at least tipsy but hoping for no wine and to at least remember getting home!
Well done to everyone on their moderating/AF claps

Wow, just worked out on the drink aware website that last week I had just under 18 units of alcohol ... the week before was over 60!!!!! I know I had over the recommended amount last week but wow the difference it makes not drinking most days and not having wine!! Quite a wake up call.

@Gemzee, wow, that is some comparison! Yes, I do that sometimes with drinks - pour one and not really want it. Just drinking mindlessly is when it gets really boring.
I've had a pamper morning, listened to my meditation and am now watching my favourite film ( Open Water !!). Feeling relaxed and content.

Hello everyone and welcome to the thread @ANewToday

I have to be honest I have been having a tricky time trying to reduce my drinking. I had a few AF free days last week and then went off the deep end at the weekend, a bottle of wine each night plus beers.

I find that if I have to much the next day I want to drink again to get rid of that awful feeling.

Last night I managed to have nothing and went to bed early and had a reasonable sleep. I'm going to just try and take one day at a time now.

Have a good day everyone.

I already had the urge to say let's go to the pub due to a rubbish day at work but managed to resist that voice.

I am going to book a restaurant for next week which will be the test because I want to have a drink because I do like it but I need to adopt a good mindset of limiting the number of drinks before I go out and then actually stick to it.

I so want to be a better drinker like I used to be. It went south when the first lockdown happened and I just ate and drank a ridiculous amount as I was struggling working from home all the time. I still am WAH with no date to go back to the office so need to find another coping mechanism.

@youboozeyoulose, yeah, just take it one day at a time. When I went to an AA meeting ( I've probably mentioned this !), they gave me a little book entitled Just For Today. I use it as a bookmark and read it in the bath of a morning. It's only a few short paragraphs but basically, it says Just for Today, abstain. I find it works most days. I try to not think of tomorrow but then that's hard sometimes as I have to be aware of potential pitfalls ! I sound like Harrison Ford !!
@ANewToday, Lockdown was a nightmare for eating n drinking. So many struggled. At least you know you've had good habits before; you can get them back. I've bought a selection of hot chocolate drinks and flavourings to have of an evening ( though daytime is my acid test), and I'm buying new pjs today as it's getting so cold here. When you go for your meal, have a limit then maybe ' fluff ' it out with soft drinks? ( Says she who sat down n immediately ordered a bottle of prosecco!!). It would work best for me to order by the glass, too. I'm so used to ordering bottles.

Good morning all, it’s a bit dark out there!
Agree that taking it one day at a time is a good idea- I try not to give alcohol the headspace- difficult still at mo- but also to not feel bad when I do have a drink- again, I feel this places too much importance on the stuff.
LOVE a hot chocolate- sound delicious!

Evening all ! How are we all doing?
I'm doing OK. Not had anything since our meal Sunday oh and 2 glasses Monday after my pampering and movie day. It seemed apt for such a perfect day. I might do that every Monday now I think about it !
I think I'm day 20 tomorrow so doing OK. My dsis has asked if I fancy going out Saturday daytime. That's sent me into a slight panic. I haven't told her about my hypnotherapy or anything but she knows I'm trying to cut down. I'm just going to see what happens. She might change her mind. If I do go out, I will need a plan so I'll work on that tomorrow.
Is anyone doing Sober October? I think I will. Oh I bought some Bavaria lager from home bargains. It's really nice, chilled with some blackcurrant or lime cordial.

Hi! I'm feeling so much better during the week now (not drank since Sunday). I feel much less tired & irritable, and happier!
I am out tomorrow night so will see how I go, my only plan really is to avoid wine.

Hi there. Yeah same here really. To avoid the wine is the only plan I need. So glad you're feeling better through the week not drinking. I am tons happier not drinking which always makes me wonder why I do it ! Habit I suppose.

No drinking of alcohol since last Friday, and have now had 2 glasses of wine and feel guilty- why??
Isn’t this moderation at work??
Is it because we associate not drinking with good behaviour, and so any drinking is a stick to beat ourselves with??
I guess, when you read quit lit telling you that alcohol is a poison, you can’t unread it and find it acceptable?

@Buntyforgirls, well 2 glasses is great. I would be happy with that. I only feel guilty when I go too far and show myself up or have to spend the next day in bed. I've never read any quit lit, it wasn't for me. You should feel proud for having 2 glasses and willpower to stop, but I hear what you're saying. Guilt is a terrible feeling.

No alcohol yet for me.

DH has bought a bottle of wine and the test will be this weekend on whether I can have a glass or two without needing to finish the bottle in one night and then walking to the local shop to buy another one to keep going.

Not planning on doing Sober October simply because I want to get out of the binge mentality and I think that would just make it worse.

Buntyforgirls that sounds good moderation to me so don't feel guilty.