Less booze. More AF days. But still a bit damp. Not dry jan, but not a soggy summer. Support thread for reducing alcohol.

[Frouby]

New thread in case the other fills up while I am busy this weekend.

Did I mention I get married tomorrow? 😁

Rubbish at clicky links but sure someone clever will be along to link the last thread.

This is a support thread for those wanting to reduce the amount you drink. There is no judgement on here. We are all struggling along with our own problems and lives and looking to cut down. You might only want a couple of weekends off. Or reduce the amount of days you drink. Or the amount you drink. Or both.

Whatever your starting point and whatever your goal come and join us for friendly chat and support.

I'm joining late and haven't had a chance to read through all of the posts (although I will) but very much in need if this thread. I'm on board

Woosey, that's what I told myself too. I put the cork back in. Especially as DD was giving me a beady eye at that point.

Welcome, limp!

Moderation rather than completely AF here too. 1 large glass of wine on saturday. 3 x 440ml cans of lager yesterday. So not too shabby really.

Welcome Limp. The more the merrier!

Not sure what this week will bring. Dh is off work wed/thur/Fri and it tends to break the 'come in from work open a can' cycle he has. Which makes being AF easier for me. Football on tonight so we will probably have a couple watching that.

Am busy as fuck this week so could do with some clear heads!

My list is as follows

1. About 30 hours of work which I do from home so can fit in whenever but means I end up getting up early to do.
2. 2 ponies to work everyday which with travel takes at least 2.5 hours.
3. Chickens to check daily.
4. Dog to walk daily
5. House to blitz including dds bedroom which we are 'sorting'.
6. A chest of drawers, wardrobe, bookcase, large desk and stool and a mirror to paint.
7. An ikea trip

Plus the usual food shop/housework/laundry/cooking and sorting ds out.

It's enough to drive me to the gin right now 😁

Welcome Limp this is a very friendly non judgemental group.
Dion Woosey putting the cork back in the bottle is definitely a Good Thing and means you are on the right track, well done both of you! Wine doesn't go off that quickly.
On the running thread we used to add our mileage daily, the aim being to get to the highest score possible each month. Maybe we could do the same here with units consumed, but with the aim to have the lowest score possible each month
How was your 5k Hella? I hope you and your DD enjoyed it.
I had a damp weekend as usual, one bottle of red consumed Fri - Sun, and no beer Sunday lunchtime in the bar after the club run, stuck to Perrier and lemon squash. All the others were drinking alcohol, I still enjoyed myself and there is no pressure at all from them for me to drink.

Anglais....if we do the unit comp thingy....hands down I’ll have the most!! Sooooo ashamed at how many units I have daily. Weirdly tho I don’t start til 8pm and am done by 10pm. So only 2 hours of it but crikey I can neck some units in that time

Don't worry Woosey it was a joke - it probably isn't helpful to shame anyone into how much they are drinking! I drank in the same quantity as you do for a long long time so can't judge, I only stopped because I'm over 50, single and menopausal, and sport is really important to me too. Therefore in order to perhaps not be single for the rest of my life, get through the menopause easily, do well at sport and set a good example to my kids 11 and 17 I sort of had to cut down drastically. I used to love drinking otherwise!

Anglais....were you drinking a bottle a night?? I never go over a bottle, or mix. I just love wine and once it’s opened, I’m a failure!! Tried not opening it but always ends up with a reason to pop that cork!! How did you get from a bottle a night to a bottle a week?? That’s seriously amazing!!
So....there was a good glass of wine left in bottom of bottle, I’ve tipped it down the drain this morning. I really want to be AF tonight. Really truly want to be.....

Hi Woosey, yes, on average a bottle a night, sometimes a little more, sometimes less (I had a wine box so I could happily remain ignorant to exactly how much I was drinking ). I always tried to have a dry Monday night and when teaching the next day I drank less, OTOH when there were no lessons more.
I was like you, I loved the taste of wine, I've got other alcohol in the house but never touched it apart from the occasional beer when it was hot. I hate spirits and would never be tempted to drink them if there was no wine in the house - I was just addicted to wine.
As for cutting back, I just decided to see if I could, I wanted to see if I was an alcoholic or not as I was certainly dependent. So it was a challenge, I went a week without drinking, slept better, looked better, felt better and didn't miss it, so decided to stay AF in the week and have wine as a treat at the weekend. Very important for me - my drinking window is BEFORE dinner, no more than 30mns and I measure out the wine so I know exactly how much I'm drinking. I have 2 glasses, put the cork back in and drink water with the meal and after, or tea later. If I drank wine with the meal it would be too easy to continue. If you go over 2 glasses so does your willpower so that is my limit.
I really smpathise with you and I know that if I was confined to the house 24/7 as a carer I would look forward to my evening drink too. But once you get into good habits it is possible to keep to them!
Good luck with going AF tonight at least! If you could do 2 nights on the trot that would be brilliant and your liver would be very grateful too

Thanks anglais for your wise words. Your story sounds so like where I am now. And it’s given me hope that I can do this. Maybe not quickly. But baby steps. Sounds silly but if I make AF tonight, I will be proud of myself. Just one night but it’s one more than I’ve been doing. Then I will gradually set bigger steps. I’m thinking I usually set myself too bigger target and then think ‘there’s no way I’ll do that, sod it!’ And give in at the first hurdle!!

woosey it's so hard. If I need to be, I can be AF no bother. But if I don't need to be I look for excuses to drink rather than not drink.

Like tonight the football is on, have spent all day painting and feel I 'deserve' a drink. If I could reward myself with something else it would be fabulously easy.

Am absolutely knackered tho now. I havent even the energy to put some tonic in the fridge.

Hi all I have been absent for a while but it's good to see how everyone is doing. I'm day 1 again today 😫I give up, don't think I will ever get control.

Woosey baby steps are great! Monday is the best day of the week to keep to resolutions too. Its easy for me as I don't have an OH to lead me into temptation every evening and in France it isn't cool to drink except at social occasions and then for women no more than 2 drinks . Not like the UK at all!

Soda and lime currently sipping down. Had dinner and would love to now sit down with glass of wine. I’m determined not to. Might have a bath and pamper....

Pampering and self indulging in things you enjoy other than a glass of wine are important if you want to be AF, don't feel guilty Woosey!

Woosey, how did you get on last night?

I caved in and had the other half of the bottle of wine. Though given that it's "only" five units or so, it's an improvement on my gin units. I have no spirits at all in the house now. I was only AF on Wednesday and Saturday last week (Friday was about 100,000 units in itself), so am determined to be AF today. Have bought some nice tonic in anticipation, and no wine.

Frouby, how are the jobs going?

Anglaise: quite right about doing absolutely anything at all that feels good and doesn't involve alcohol.

Rupert, stay with us. I fail regularly...

Jobs are mixed Athena.

Painted dds bedroom furniture yesterday. Forgot we also had orthodontist today which takes a good couple of hours due to where it is. Did about an hours work, shot off there. Got rid of her old desk. And bags and bags of rubbish. Did chooks and watered everything on plot which takes an hour. Took dog for an hours walk and sorted 3 baskets of clean laundry.

Just put door handles on her furniture. Nipped to aldi.

And succumbed to gin. Only have 2 tonics though so will only be having 2 35ml.

Got to get laptop out later and do another hours work.

But needed a gin after running around all day.

Tomorrow I have at least 14 hours work. To fit in 6 hours 😂😂. Fml.

Quickly popping in....

Last night stayed AF. Was doing well and didn’t feel weakened at all. Ate dinner and started to run a bath for myself ready for that pamper I’d promised myself. Then suddenly dd has anaphylaxis which involves adrenaline and ambulances. Then an overnight stay in hosp.
So today....neighbour invited me over teatime then poured me a glass of fizz as a ‘you deserve it’. I had 1.5 glasses there. Three half a glass away!!
Have come home and on second shall glass. Want to down the whole bloody lot and scream fml over and over. But trying to stay strong!! Wtf is strong hey?!

Oh Woosey . I would want to down the whole lot, too, and nobody would blame you if you did.

Frouby, you are very industrious. And I'm impressed by the moderation. Have managed to stay AF tonight, thanks to Seedlip, tonic, Tesco no-alcohol G&T, and more tonic. Will be peeing all night.

So sorry about your DD Woosey but well done on staying AF Monday night, one night in a week is a great start.
And well done Dion too, I'm up peeing every night because I drink so much water, because of the menopause and because of my mother (she has always had bladder issuses I think I've inherited them!)
Without wanting to sound like a stuck record, you don't need a drink to relax after a difficult or busy day, you just think you do, you need a drink to feed your addiction. There is a good article here on how to break the beliefs and habits regarding drink and drugs.

Morning all

Well done in AF Monday woosey. And sorry about your dd. It must be terrifying, are they any further forward in finding out why it's happening?

Only had 1 g and t last night in the end. Just didn't fancy another. So almost AF. Moderation for sure.

Need to stock up on tonic. 1 g and t is enough. Think its the faff of making it. Its too easy to open another can or pour another wine. And because gin tastes stronger and not as sweet it's not as Moorish as other drinks.

I also have a higher tolerance for gin so moderate easier. 2 glasses of wine and I enter fuck it mode.

Also calories.

Not sure what tonight will bring. Have soft play hell later. 😝

Frouby soft play hell would send anyone reaching for the gin!!
Well done you on moderation. I’m the same with gin, one is fine. Then I just top up the same glass with tonic continuously so in fact moderate really well. My fuck it button seems to be jammed stuck currently and I press it before I get into the kitchen!!

Urghhhhhhh I’ve got a hangover!! Feel like I’ve got a vice clamp on my head and I’m wading through treacle!! Why why why do I do this.....

Should read can do 3 as night 3 tonight but happy to leave 4 as after the last few weeks managing 3 or 4 AF nights in a row something amazing happened yesterday...drum roll please... I forgot I drink wine! Honestly forgot! It got to about 9pm and I was sat drinking tea and it dawned on me I hadn’t had to fight the urge to have wine as I’d forgotten to want it! How brilliant is that!!!! I’m now super excited that slowly AF nights in the week are getting easier to do and actually I think becoming normalish. So pleased! Really hoping for 5 in a row this week and I will let you know if it happens....

Actually that's brilliant! Once you forget that you want something you know you aren't addicted to it...I found that a great relief. I've been AF in the week for 10 months now and never even think of having a drink in the week, even though there is often an open bottle of wine left over from the weekend. It is just a question of breaking a bad habit and replacing it with a good one.

Your so right anglaise. I have a half an open bottle from Sunday that I’m hoping to sample on Saturday, Friday if I cave but trying not too. I’m hoping it will be ok still but if it’s not who cares. I can throw it away😱. I haven’t had all the other bottles all week so it’s ok! What I do need to do is find another way to reward myself in general. When it dawned on me this am again how yesterday went I got that celebration urge. You must know it. I need a way out of, my reward for absolutely everthing being a glass of wine! You’ve managed 10 months so you must have a way of dealing with the reward yourself wine?