What's the most WTF assumption you've heard about yourself.

[Motorwayview]

Mine is a hum dinger.
DH is significantly older than me - he is retired and I work PT. We have planned carefully so we were able to retire somewhere sunny. During our 35 years together he was a medium earner and I was the higher earner - his job was flexible for school drop offs/ pick ups ect. We have 2 adult DC and grandchildren.
He has joined a hobby group and last night they had a social evening so I went along.
Random woman - who was the wife of the organiser I found out later- " Well, you've landed on your feet - HIS children and ex wife must hate you " said very loudly in front of a group of people I don't really know.
I did put her straight , but WTF !

I have just remembered the time I was waiting outside a primary school to collect my daughter and got told by one of the other mums to go back where I came from because this country didn't need people like me.

I was born and bred here – one side of the family has been traced back, by a cousin who is fascinated by such things, to about 1350 in Richmond, Yorkshire, in church records of births marriages and deaths.

I still wonder what made her assume I wasn't English; maybe it was that I had my hair in plaits.

Looks lovely.

People always assume I'm a vegetarian. I'm not.

I just "look like one" apparently.

French plaits??

Several people have said to me that they were really shocked that I was nice … 🤷🏼‍♀️😂 I apparently I look very stand offish and too cool for school 🫤

Me too! I have no idea what a vegetarian looks like.
My worst WTF was being told while pregnant that there was a rumour going round work that such a body bloke in another department was the father of my baby, not my husband. I had never met this man.

I got this a lot. Assumed I was middle class/ private school, when I was so far from that. First to even finish school, lived in a homeless hostel aged 14-16, free school meals and all that.

I went to an event with my friend 3 years younger than me today and someone that was talking to her asked if I was her mum. My friend burst out laughing. I had to stop myself from bursting into tears 😂

I had a lot of time off work for mental health reasons. I came back and people kept asking to see my neck.
For some reason, people had assumed I had slit my own throat. Clearly some knob had started it and it just escalated.

Another was one that I was the daughter of my friend. It happened twice in totally different places. I was asked if she was my mum. I am actually 2 years older than she is.

One big assumption that hurt (and still does);
I have a visual impairment - previous surgery on my eyes has meant they are not synetrical - one has a droop, one is artificial and further back in my head. They’re not aligned.
I have been openly told by someone that when they first met me, they assumed I had learning difficulties due to my appearance. They chuckled and said they were shocked to talk to me and realise I had a degree, lived independently, worked a professional job etc. Based on my face. Sadly, I have had similar judgements and questions.

Assumptions that I chuckle about:

When I purchased my first home, I had at least 3 people assume I was buying it as a rental. That I was staying in my family’s home. Why? Because I was single! How was I going to cope living on my own? Similar assumptions that I wouldn’t last long - all by people who’s children (my friends) had moved straight out of family homes in with their boyfriends and all of which have never had to manage a thing by themselves. Yet the assumption that I would manage “if it doesn’t work you can move back home can’t you, it will be very hard by yourself you need to be ready”.

One that I find funny to this day - I have a WhatsApp with my friend’s husband. He’s my friend too - it is a complete geek thread - it is me asking which laptop would he recommended, asking a question about their fridge when I was looking for a new one, and asking him to please check my friend’s (his wife and my original friend) wardrobe to see if she already had purchased a bag I wanted to get her for a birthday! Nothing dodgy going on (I would never, I don’t see him like that either and never have) but a couple of friends assume that if I’m talking to him on a private thread (which my friend has seen) I can’t possibly be trusted around married men, I must be in love with him, I just be trying to have an affair….i find it hilarious- and so do the married couple ironically.

Did you set him straight?

Haha, literally the same here but my friend was assumed to be my mum, even though she is 2 years younger than me. Has happened twice now

I used to be a deputy head teacher in a secondary school. I’m fairly reserved in social situations with new people, though I was an effective teacher who could be animated in the classroom, and dealing with teenagers presenting with challenging behaviours was a key part of my leadership role.

In social conversations, every man who ever asked me what I did for a living and was told I was a teacher responded with ‘primary?’. I mean every single man, over the course of a twelve year career. I’m not saying these conversations happened that often, but it was probably a couple of times a year on average.

I found it interesting (and annoying) that the default assumption was that a woman (and a softly spoken one) must work in a more nurturing primary setting, rather than a secondary setting. That’s no shade on primary teachers, by the way, who have a particular skillset and deal with lots of challenges, but the obvious sexism blew my mind.

I’ve had people assume I’m narcissistic because of my social anxiety. That is the complete opposite of what social anxiety is. I’m not quiet because I think I’m too good to talk to people. I’m quiet because I think everyone is better than me and they couldn’t possibly want to talk to me.

Haha at least you were the assumed daughter. I’ve been having a hard time with health physically and mentally lately so it kind of got to me a little when I know really I shouldn’t take it personally. My husband thinks it’s hilarious as it’s so ridiculous 😂

You either look amazing for your age, or your "DD" looks rough as hell.

Years ago,I was a single parent and there where some nasty bully bitchy mothers at the school-my face didn't fit and I didn't want to be 'in' with them either so we just avoided each other

Anyway,one day I'd promised the kids I'd do some baking with them at the weekend but realised I didn't have any scales at home so dropped the kids off at school at about 8:45am and was walking into argos about 9:10am

Bought the scales,went to tesco for flour and eggs before getting on a bus with my booty and heading home

Well fuck me,one of the bitchy mothers had either followed me or spotted me walking into argos and hung around to see what I'd bought

By the time I went to pick the kids up,a nasty rumour had been spread that I was a drug dealer and had been seen in argos buying myself a new set of scales to weigh my stash (they'd even rang my narc mother to inform her of my 'new hobby')

People believed this bollocks-the scales where a normal 'bowl on top of the scales' set and nothing like a drug dealer set (im guessing they use electric ones)

They even tried to claim I'd sent ds in with a small bag of coke in his lunchbox by mistake (I've never touched the stuff in my life)

They even rang ss to 'dob her in it' (nothing happened-they just came round,had a chat,rang the school and case closed which pissed these women off but they couldnt do much)

It took me months to get rid of this rumour

I've never done drugs in my life (apart from about 2 drags on a spiff when I was 17)

I guess these women just didn't have a life so made drama for the sake of it while egging each other on

I could write a book on what happened in that school playground

I mean a little side hustle never harmed anybody, we all know academia doesn't always pay well 😄😄

That I had got a job because I was having "some kind of relationship with the boss". Never mind that is been doing the job for a year as a temp, went through a formal interview process which included neither my boss or his boss and got the job because I was extremely good at it. When I heard the rumour for the fifth time, I went to the mans boss (who I sat on an executive committee with) and quietly mentioned that if I heard it again my next call would be to HR. Never heard it again.

14, taking my 5 year old cousin to town, he asks where we’re going and a lady answered ‘To town with your mam’. I was very obviously underage!

When I went to France as part of my degree, nobody believed I was English. I had to get out my ID to prove it. I’d already spent time in France and everyone thought I sounded French. On a similar note, everyone I meet assumes I’m from ‘down south’ because I don’t have a broad Geordie accent.

I often get told that I "dont look like someone who has had six kids!"

Every single time I ask "Oh, what do women who have had six kids look like then?" and again every single time, I get the awkward laugh and the "oh I dont know, I was just surprised as its unusual!" or similar. I know exactly what they think though, I am a size 8/10, work hard and have a very neutral accent. If they were being honest they would say that they expected that I would either be very poor, ill educated, and common or very fat, and more likely all of the above.

Made friends with a woman through other friends when our children were all in infants/juniors

a few years ago she told me that when the children were in pre school she wanted to get to know me but someone she talked to at the pre school told her i was very religious 😳

A i am an atheist and had been for approximately 20 years at the time
B why not still approach me to make your own mind up

For @Thingamebobwotsit

It's hardly extreme, but my late partner's website and email address were something like snowdrop.com. (His cat, who he had before I met him, was called Snowdrop)

I used to go to events with him and was introduced as his girlfriend. The number of people who said "Oh you must be Snowdrop" was embarrassing, especially when I explained that, actually, that was his cat.

as a women and a working mother i’ve lost count of the amount of assumptions made about me. Also it’s always assumed that my husband earns more than me or is more senior than me, when neither of these are true

Just the other week I had a sales person (think it was windows) on my drive when I pulled in. He told me it was ok, he only wanted to speak to home owners