Is it horrible to make ds walk

[Whyohwhy99]

Am I horrible making ds walk for 40 mins to and from school because I want to avoid the bus?

If he had issues regarding getting wet I'm sure OP would have mentioned them. But even with issues there's no escaping getting rained on occasionally (so different to sensory issues that are avoidable)so building up tolerance while still a child is important, otherwise its setting them up for a much more difficult life.
Walking to decompress can be very helpful if he finds school hard but if it gets too difficult for her son she can reassess but there is zero reason in writing off walking to school accompanied just because a child had SEN, which is what the poster I replied to was implying.

I can't get over the hassle you are getting for 2 fit and healthy people to do a less than 2 mile walk twice a day ( double for you but it sounds like you have the time and energy to do it).

This is normal walking !

Have we become so wedded to our cars that this seems unreasonable. Crack on, enjoy your walks, enjoy ( and occasionally endure) the changing of the seasons. Make up stories, have opinions on building works and gardens on the way. You will both be fitter and stronger as a result.

Enjoy your walking!

Very obtuse.

It's a rubbish start for most children and adults.

I previously pushed you to try and take the bus as often as you could and try and increase things because you'd originally said it was social anxety that stopped you. But if it's not that and is, for instance, over stimulation because of your autism, exposure isn't going to help you overcome it, it will just add to your cognitive load every time you do it. So I apologise for pushing that angle, please ignore my previous posts.

Walking first thing in the day is a very good start for both adults and children, don't be ridiculous. Wear proper weatherproof clothing and rain is a non-issue.

The child has SEN and is going to an SEN school.

If both parent and child enjoy the walk, then it is beneficial in many ways. However, I feel that being able to get the bus as well if the weather is particularly vile or for any other reason it would be a good idea for both of them to learn how to cope with using the bus.

Too far.Can't he get the bus?

I think as long as your prepared to use the bus when the weather is really bad.. But if its highly polluted along a busy road i think i would take the bus.

Sorry my ignorance I thought Sen was for senior school, now I understand better. But still thinking of weather and if child was ill could you maybe try getting on the bus just for a short distance and then walking the rest or walking then a short distance on the bus, just incase you really need to go by bus at some time in the future. You yourself could be unwell or something and unable to walk 40 minutes each way.

I have never said it was one thing. There's been a mixture of suggestions on here. But also the gp mentioned socal anxiety, autism, adhd. Although theres been no diagnosis I also don't want to ignore it. Because if it is the case I have spend all the time possibly making it worse. I think its about finding something that isn't to much. But is something. I have mentioned on this thread i could get an uber sometimes and there is a bus I could possibly get sometimes its a bus that only gos 3 or 4 stops before it terminates. Theres often no one or only a few people on there. It doesn't quite tahe us half way. But its something.

The autism /adhd came about in one of my orher threads and me and other posters spoke about it quite a bit. And they encouraged me to contact GP. Seeing the GP was a big step for me. And the whole thing is new to me i have always just thought i was a bit odd. So I don't want to treat it like its 100% right but I also dont want to ignore it. And risk making things worse.

OP, I feel for you. Many posters are igniring your problem unfairly. 40 mins walk for an 11 year old is NOTHING. No wonder people think younger generations have no resilience. Good, healthy start and end to the school day and nice chatting time. Listen to Michael Mosely on the benefits of walking in the rain.

Lots if assumptions there.

Ds finds it easier than primary. Yes its secondary that doesn't automatically make it harder.

Theres are 7 children in his class with 4 adults. As soon as they have finished the work they are given they are allowed to play with play dough. Sand and other things. Most of their lessons are in class. Apart from cooking, music, pe.

He does not come out of school stressed. He tells me about his day what he done etc

He also doesn't have to carry anything to school.

My kids did this, not too long ago. They refused a lift even if pouring with rain because they preferred to walk and socialise with their friends. They weren’t particularly sporty so it was good exercise and good for their mental health being with their friends. It’s ridiculous that some people are saying it’s “odd”. Not at all, just normal to use your legs. Don’t get me started on all the parents who would sit outside the school with their engines running for more than 15 minutes doubling the pollution for the kids coming out of school.

A week in...

Crack on then.

I know, it's madness. I appreciate it's different and a more complicated situation for the OP after reading more of her posts, but in general getting kids to walk to school is so good for them. We used to live in a very very polluted city abroad and the school our DS went to could only be reached by, at best, a 40 minute car drive or an hour school bus journey to and from school, in heavy traffic. He got picked up at 7am and was exhausted by the time he got home. So as soon as we moved away from there and lived in a small, safe town I knew we would be encouraging him to walk or bike - he gets to listen to music, have some thinking time, and meet up with friends along the way, plus he has dyspraxia and doesn't enjoy sports, so this gets his exercise needs taken care of too. I do not understand the people on this thread who think it's mean to make kids walk for half hour or so at a time - majority of the time they are very capable of doing so.

And often they want to. I had a friend in school who lived quite far from the school so her mum drove her but pretty soon she got her mum to drop her at mine so she could walk to school too. It was sociable. It is different in op's case because her son isn't walking with friends but he does seem to be enjoying walking and talking with his mum so its social for him too. Some of the best chats are had while walking with someone in my experience.

This! @BlueFahrenheit

walking is good for you, great exercise 😀

I asked Ds this morning. What are the good things about walking to school . He said we can talk. And theres fresh air and other things. I asked him whats the bad things. He said hes scared of the roads and the green man gos to fast and the cars stop but the green man doesn't show and then it does fot 3 seconds.

I asked whats good about the bus. He said you sit down and don't have to worry till its our stop.

Bad things he said if the bus does something different like a different way. He doesn't like it if theres screaming/shouting. He doesn't like maggots on the bus. I asked what he meant his reply was you know maggots them things and they are you know and like that. I dont know what he was talking about.

But he seems happy to walk for now.

It's fine. If he does have to carry anything he can have a backpack. If he has a decent coat and shoes he won't be wet all day. It sounds like he'd be happy with it and would enjoy talking to you on the way. For the legs when you're on your own, could you listen to a book/podcast if you find it boring?

this sounds like a lovely day and a wonderful school for him. It must be so nice for him to have mum's full attention walking to and from school, getting to spend time with you. Obviously when the weather is not so good it might be a bit less fun but realistically this is a good solution for you right now.

I am sure your anxiety etc is making you question yourself, but I know my kids would have loved me to spend this time taking them to school, especially the smaller one who was SEN, but I was a teacher so they had to get the bus.

Try not to be so hard on yourself, enjoy the walk and the time with your son