Is it horrible to make ds walk

[Whyohwhy99]

Am I horrible making ds walk for 40 mins to and from school because I want to avoid the bus?

IMO there is nothing wrong with the weather it is unsuitable clothing. I wouldn't expect anyone to walk in snow or really very heavy rain. 40 mins is not that far. My DD used to walk her children 45mins to the shops, then back when they were under 5.

SEN

Wow how patronising. Also the idea that autistic people struggle with theory of mind, and the idea that autism is defined by a total "lack" of it is an outdated and overly simplistic view. I don’t think you should be lecturing to any autistic mothers re potential problems and it’s hugely concerning if you do.

Re your theory of anxiety, those with it don’t generally underestimate or dismiss it. The very condition means they’re more likely to be worried about its impact which is a moot point as you can’t just switch it off. Making the best of it and learning strategies to manage the day as a whole is far better. Starting and ending each day with a hugely stressful and exhausting bus journey that will deplete spoons hugely for the entire day and evening is a silly and unnecessary idea. Walking off anxiety whilst getting exercise and fresh air is far more beneficial.

No it isn’t, children have done for centuries and still do walk longer

ts not my theory of anxiety, it is the psychological approach to anxiety. And while you have clearly had some input that is meaningful to you in terms of the spoons idea which you raise, there is a way to overlap ND needs with psychotherapy for anxiety. It is not one or the other.

For the PPs whose childhood experiences have been affected by a parents anxiety, I am sorry that happened for you. For those on the thread who have anxiety, I am sorry this is happening for you.

For @Diddlyd00 - you need to get over yourself.

It depends on the extent of the learning disabilities and how vulnerable the yp is. Often people with lds cope when everything is well but they can panic if something changes, get confused, make poor decisions.

I think you need to get over yourself and your outdated stigmatising views of autism in women. It is not the psychological approach to anxiety. 🙄

He has no physical disabilities and is enjoying the talking “mum/son time”.

I know. I posted earlier to say I thought what they were doing was fine. But you posted about learning disabilities not being a barrier to walking and for some kids that's only true to a point.

I wouldn't walk more than 30mins . Could he bicycle?

Unless he is neuro divergent in some way and if it's a school bus I'm sorry but I can't for the life of me understand why he can't do the journey alone with his peers...if it's a normal bus service then OK but, after a few times with you making sure he knows what's what and if he's willing to do so, he still should surely be able to go on the bus by himself? 🙄

Could you buy a tandem and cycle together? It would be a nice mother/son bonding experience.

I doubt the OP could handle this ....

Yes

No you're not horrible @Whyohwhy99 walking is good exercise.

If the weather is bad, you might force yourself on a bus - I get you dont like lots of people, but better that than arrive in school soaked, cold or both.

If it's his nearest appropriate school then you should qualify for SEND Transport such as a shared taxi or minibus to school. I can't find where you've explained why he doesn't qualify.

It's probably okay when it's reasonably mild but won't be once the weather gets colder and wetter or it snows. If you can get support to manage things, you should at least get the cost for both you and him travelling by bus so do think about it.

Cycling together might be an option too.

Nope. Healthy not horrible.

Oh, that’s very different!! If the op is going too then that is totally fine! I thought she was sending him off on his own and thought fuck no.

You can't walk and talk?

<Sorry, just struck me as funny>

What works for you and yours doesn't necessarily work for everyone.

Of course it's fine if he's ok with it. I walked 2 miles to school and 2 miles home every day from age 12 onward in order to save the bus fare my mum gave me. About two thirds of the time I walked with a friend but a third of the time I did it on my own.

I was going to ask this and maybe suggest that you take the bus one day on, one day off just for few days or first week and then see how he feels about it what his preference is.

Why is it horrible if he has SEN? Are children with SEN less waterproof than children without? He can wear appropriate clothing and OP has said he can change at school if needed so no need for him to be in wet clothes. Walking is also a great way to decompress after stress so its beneficial if he has difficulties at school.

40 minutes before a whole day at school, and then 40 minutes home again? Yes, of course it is.

Gosh people are so obtuse

He may find school very very hard work. He's new, it's secondary school, and he doesn't find school the easiest. We don't know what SEN he has. He may find getting changed/getting wet/ waterproofs massively challenging, I know my ASD child would find that a rubbish start. And then he gets through the day which may be harder for him than your average child and has to walk another 40 mins home. It would be good if he still had some energy to do a sport or something more fun as physical energy than walking to school

None of know any of these answers. Only OP does. But surely, surely it's not hard to imagine some possible reasons?

It depends. If he's 11, how much longer are you going to be taking him to school? Does he have friends that catch the bus or walk? What if he was ill at school and needed to get home or if the weather was really bad torrential rain or extreme heat like we have had. Don't pass your phobias onto your child.