Just a rant: I absolutely fucking HATE weekends!

[canihavecanihave]

First thing on Saturday is my low point: all weekend yawning before me.

I feel like the whole two days are just an exhausting merry go round of trying to do stuff to fill time and entertain the kids (both under 5 so hopeful this may get better) to stop them arguing and destroying the house.

I know some people will say just to chill at home but if we ever try to do this it is so so stressful, they argue and make a mess everywhere.

Ugh.

Honestly it does get easier as they get older. Unless they start rugby. Then it will be shit forever . Ask me how I know 😂

Rugby starts again tomorrow after a three month hiatus!

I relate to everything you're saying. Of course it's work...? You seem to have had children without thinking about what the reality of it would actually involve, which seems to be an increasingly common experience. It's hard to feel much sympathy for you. I think you should focus on figuring out how to enjoy your life and children instead of ruminating on what hard work they are. All children are. It's the trade you make for the privilege of having them!

Yes same here 😅 I actually love Sunday nights!!! The weekends with small children and a DH who works away and no local
family and friends who are always busy with their own families at weekends seems so long. Didn’t seem to bad during the sunny weather and could ship us all to the park

@imisscashmere I am not really seeking your or anybody’s sympathy tbh I decided to share how I was feeling this morning, which has invited a number of responses, some critical, some questioning, some understanding, some funny. All the above is OK.

It is true I had absolutely no idea what the reality would be and I do kind of blame MN for that (said with affection) as I thought it would be as simple as a park visit, a bath and a film and Saturdays would be sorted. Turns out it’s much, much more than that!

I don’t know about that last one @Tennings you were liable to get roasted alive at our parks this summer. It’s only recently they are usable again. I fucking hate parks to be fair but my youngest has just learned how to get on and off the big climbing frame herself so you know, we’re getting there. Now if she’d just figure out how to get off it …

2 year olds are brutal, and frustration of the older one when they’re destroying their games and upset of the little one that they won’t involve them, in an ideal world you’d think of something constructive to entertain them both but just so exhausted!

Mine turned three last month. I actually drank a very rare glass of wine in celebration that I will never, ever parent a two year old again.

I may have said an incredulous YERWOT to a school mum who cooed it was her favourite age! We are all different!

Strange you should say that as I can relate to op and feel huge sympathy for her and everything she has said in her update.

You can be at one and the same time immensely aware of the privilege of having children and be worn down by the relentlessness of parenting you know.

I don’t know why you think it will be helpful to op to get all judgy about it? We all live in different circumstances and have different strengths and weaknesses and we all meet the different challenges presented by the various stages of parenting in our own individual way. Someone who finds the early years challenging can be great at parenting teens and vice versa.

And it’s not really possible to know in advance of having children where your particular strengths lie.

Op it sounds like you need a break and more support at weekends.

And maybe give yourself permission to do a couple of things per week you enjoy that get you away from the pressures of it all. Could you afford cover for that or would your dh or a family member step up to cover?

There is a wee bit of provocativeness @Swarthysandwich543 , I wouldn’t rise to it. Any post that admits parenting small children isn’t always joyous and actually can be quite miserable (I’m not saying I am but I have found it so on occasion) attracts the Just You Wait Teens Are Worsts and the What Did You Expects.

But I will confess @Swarthysandwich543 that my youngest is going from two days to three at nursery this year for school prep. I did actually ask if I could increase my hours at work. THEY TURNED ME DOWN!

So I have A DAY TO MYSELF FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2020!!!!

😁Pl don't do any housework on that day. Watch Rivals and drink wine!

I actually really appreciate your post. I feel the same. Parenting a two year old right now who is an absolute delight but is wild.

Parenting is not what I thought it would be at all. Mostly because I didn’t envisage having no help so it’s just me and my husband saying “I’m so tired” on repeat after both working full time all week 😂

Anyway, I’m sending sympathy even if you aren’t looking for it 😊

4 was the turning point for me. You are not that far away.

Well, some people love their jobs, I guess, and maybe they're the kids who got bored in the holidays! Respect that everyone is different and entitled to their view. Personally I prefer the weekends as it's the only time we get family time without work spoiling it. And yes, I know some people obviously work weekends.

Teens are dicks but at least you don’t have to 24/7 supervise their dickishness. 😂.

Oh that sounds goooooood

@CoffeeNContingencies honestly I have really struggled with two (as in the age although tbf I’ve struggled with two kids as well.) I think it’s the fact there’s no reasoning with them at all. Ours got obsessed with ice on holiday last year; if you had a drink with ice in it she’d fish it out and hold it in her hand and then cry and get upset when it melted. And demand ‘more nice!’ And I was laughing about it with friends and it’s like yeah … on one level it is funny and sweet but also it meant I couldn’t enjoy a cold drink without a toddler sticking her fingers in it. And these tiny frustrations have a way of building up and building up and can make you into this tense boiling pot.

It does get better as language and reasoning improves and I agree with @friedaklein four is a lovely age mostly I’m sad I’ll miss a lot with DD as an August born.

@seahorsessky sorry?

@AllJoyAndNoFun teens undoubtedly bring their own challenges but I’ll say this much: you can have a lie in!

Yes I get that actually. Funny once or twice then like seriously 👀😂

My two year old is OBSESSED with hair. I have really long hair and I have to put it up so tight to try and stop him climbing it. Several times a day he’s got his hands in it pulling it all out of the bun etc. Sometimes just a gentle stroke. Sometimes….

The age two is a bit nuts isn’t it!!

We are trying for baby no 2. I’m petrified but we do want another. The lack of family is difficult but I know those first few years until kids can be reasoned with are brutal but will pass 🤞🏼

I won’t lie, life was easier with one.

Buuuut my DD is so clever and funny and beautiful I can’t imagine life without her and it does go fast with your second in fact, and she’s actually been a lot easier than no1, ice obsession notwithstanding.

My job didn’t offer set days so we used to have to pay for full time childcare even though I only worked part tIme, so I had 2 full days a week at home with kids in childcare 8-6 and then in childcare the other days I worked too of course, only time I loved the weekends with them 🤣

Omg I've loved this thread! I have a just turned 4yo and a 2yo and I feel so validated! Particularly by the comments about how wild (trying to) parent a 2yo is!

I'm finding the dynamics of two little kids who both have their own opinions and preferences quite tricky lately and it can make the weekends feel very long with the fighting and winding each other up. My 4yo is at the point of creating little games etc, and she gets very upset when her sister either doesn't want to take part or ruins it somehow 🙈 they can play SO nicely together some days, but other days it's constant fights and screaming! My 2yo has also been having intense tantrums for the last month or so.

For us, getting out works well on some days, but leaving fun places like the playground is still tricky for both kids and it's also hard for one person to manage both of them at the moment - so it's not a magical solution!

I can see the light with my 4yo though. I can reason with her, and have actual fun conversations. She's still very clingy to me though which drives me a bit batty on rough days! I know I'll miss it one day!

I hate it when they’ll lull me into a false sense of security by playing nicely and then I’ll try to do something and a shriek will be heard …

I would expect things will get better for you, but TBH there's no reason weekends have to be terrible when you have little ones. If getting out of the house is too stressful and staying home is awful, it's hard to know what to suggest. Do the children play well together? If not, can you think of some games that are based on teamwork so they enjoy working together in some way? Children of those ages often like to "help" with housework (even if they are more of a hindrance) so that could be something to involve them with as well. Just tossing out ideas. Though if this thread is intended for venting rather than seeking solutions, I completely understand that impulse too. In which case: solidarity. This too shall pass.

Yes! The moment you relax, all hell breaks loose!

Earlier, I left them sitting on two separate sofas and went into the kitchen to start dinner. I started hearing lots of screaming, but thought they were just screaming back and forth at each other (as they do..), it didn't stop so I went back into the sitting room to find my 2yo basically on top of my 4yo on the sofa pulling her hair....for no discernible reason!!!!

It does get easier, although I still feel i spend the weekend running around cooking, cleaning, tidying mess and mine are 14 and 10!

Tbh, the hardest part of weekends for me right now is how tired I am from the juggle of work and parenting all week. When I make the effort to actually play with them and remain calm myself, things can be so lovely. It's when I'm desperately trying to have 10 minutes to myself to have a cup of tea and they are on top of me that I get frustrated and they pick up on that.

It makes me sad that I'm so exhausted from the week I can barely enjoy the weekend, when I spend the week missing them when they're in nursery!