A year to change my life, anyone want to join me?

[OneYearLater]

I’m 3 years away from 50 and have had a mental list of things I’ve wanted to change for so long but never really got round to doing anything about them. I’ve read/watched so much self-help stuff but never seem to actually put any of it into practice. I’ve had enough of just bumbling along and doing not much so going to spend the next year putting in as much effort as I can to make things happen.
I’m posting here for accountability but also happy for anyone who wants to join me. I plan to update weekly, if anyone is interested. Below is my list of where I’d like to be in a year:

• Regular strength training, really noticed myself getting weaker as I get older
• Joining a running club and having completed a half marathon
• Fit in a pair of Levi’s that I bought over a decade ago
• Decluttering my house and making it feel more like home. It’s not in a terrible state but we’ve lived here nearly 5 years and done some work but it really needs some extra love and care.
• Start building more of a social circle. I WFH and haven’t put much effort into getting to know too many people where I live and have really felt that in the last few years.
• Find a way of making a second income
• I have 2 DDs and I’d like to find a hobby I can do with each of them
• Improve my relationship with DH, we’re still happy but life has got in the way the last few years and I miss the connection we used to have
• Stop wasting time on rubbish, mostly doom scrolling
• Get refocused at work and get better at my job
• Change my style, it would currently be described as middle aged frump!
• Deep down I’ve never really liked myself and the way I look. I want to at least not hate what I see in the mirror and accept myself for who I am

That’s the list, I’ve started by joining a gym I just need to make myself go. Not sure what’s next but will see what I can improve on each week.

@StripyRedSockswhich language are you learning? Do you already speak it?
Don't you find that goals seem to always contradict each other - especially a financial goal!

@12things I studied 2 languages many years ago, French and German, but really do not use/speak them very often, thought it would be a good entry point into studying again, but with familiarity before I branch out.

lol, yes to the Finances, although I think my spare funds might be going to the vet this afternoon!

Have you got a parkrun local to you? You will meet so many people locally, have opportunities to volunteer there, and its all good training towards your half marathon. I really recommend it.

Good for you @OneYearLater , I used to work in motivation. I have suggestions.
I would put sort marriage/relationship high on list. If he doesn't support and encourage you it will make your life harder.
You didn't list anything about your inner self or soul nor did you mention reading or poetry.
Do not get a pet, it will take over and dictate to you. Keep yourself open to enjoying spontaneous events. You will have to consider the DCs of course but keep as much free time as you can.
You are the priority.

Mine arrived last night! I didn't have much of a go on it then, but am looking forward to seeing how much I get around to using it.

Have also sought out some YT vids based on recommendations here and found a couple for weights. I only have tiny weights at home right now, but plan on getting slightly heavier ones soon 💪

All our goals are so similar!

My progress is slow. I’m at the planning stage 😂. It reminds me of designing my revision timetable- lots of list writing and not enough action!

Morning all, I’ve been away for a week so not much to update. I’m going to get straight back into it though. Normally any break from anything is a slow restart but I’m determined not to go backwards.
I’ve still got a few days off work so today will be washing (have no idea how we create so much in a week!), tidying, food shop and some admin. Tomorrow I’ll be back at the gym and hopefully start some decluttering.
How is everyone else doing?

I'm in! Need to compile my list...

I’m also in! Got the dumbbells mocking me in the corner of the lounge, and booked on a new gym class tomorrow. I’d normally cancel the class as I’m nervous about it, but am inspired to just go.

Other things for my list

• make more of an effort with appearance, just consistent basics like body lotion, nails and minimal makeup. — find something to study and learn - decide if taking redundancy in next 6 months - accept more invitations and be less hermit.

Can I please join...my goals for a year:
To be going to the gym consistently (I am 4 months into this)
To start swimming again
To lose 2.5 stone (I have lost 16 pounds but still need to lose this weight)
To have £10,000 saved towards house deposit (I am on just over 3k so far)
To declutter each room of my house
To get my online time down to an hour a day
To far nish and pass a professional qualification I'm currently studying for
To read each day

Wow that sounds like a lot but lots of these I have begun so it's about building consistency. This thread is very inspiring

It’s a great list but a big list and I’m worried you’ll set yourself up to feel disappointed and throw in the towel if you don’t keep everything on track.

Being realistic not negative, there must be reasons why those things aren’t achievable/haven’t been achieved by now.

I would reframe it and see success as “on my way to” achieving those things

@OneYearLater we're in the same boat !
I've just got back from 2 weeks away. There are only 2 of us but the washing .....at least it's all outside in the sun.
I've managed some of my targets whilst away which I'm pleased about. I've got 2 weeks now til the 1st month evaluation and thankfully a couple of my targets will be easily met ( lose a few pounds, decrease wine intake).
Pleased I put money away instead of being frivolous ( or over generous with presents !).
Sending 💪

@TooHotMyIcecreamHasMelted you raise an excellent point as to why some targets we set haven't been met in the past.
I was thinking about this on holiday. Losing weight I've tried for years, it just doesn't happen. I think i get complacent / bored so I've signed up to a course run by my gp - it's focused more on health and nutrition. As opposed to getting into those size 14 jeans ! ( vanity)
It's my mindset that needs changing
Hope that makes sense / jetlagged 😣

I definitely agree that mindset is important. Most of these goals I have started working towards except swimming, decluttering and phone use so systems are alreu in place ...I just need to be consistent, which is where mindset comes in I guess.

It is a big list, some of the things are completely new like the second income and some things like being on top of work and running regularly are things I used to have but let slide over the years.
I feel like I’m coming out the other side of having young kids and I can breathe again but don’t want to stay stuck in a rut.
I don’t think it’s negative to question it but everything on there has value to me so even achieving part of it will be a win.

I'm doing pretty much the same as last week

• practising piano every day and loving it
• I've done a few things to improve my 'appearance' (using that term lightly), eye test & new glasses booked for this weekend, using foot exfoliator and cream, using anti nail biting varnish
• booked sensory deprivation tank
• started using Duolingo. Not used it for years and not enjoying the new updates where your energy runs out constantly. Any tips to get round this?
• found an in person Spanish class that starts in September
• went for a drink with my partner. Only an hour but was the best we can do without having childcare!
• I'm thinking of what new thing to do in August...trying a new thing every month. July is the sensory deprivation tank

Think I might try wild swimming. It's definitely the weather for it!

I think lots of tweaking round the edges can make a significant difference without disrupting the foundations?

I moved my credit card balance into my current account provider to make it more visible. It is definitely inhibiting some random purchases and I have a mini target for July in progress. - I need to keep my job to achieve this goal rather than changing it 😄

@StripyRedSocks I love mini targets - less overwhelming. I often set them for spending - so, I'll say I'm not spending online for 2 weeks, for example. It does work for me. Mostly.

You’ve made a great start, all those things will add up over the year. Can’t wait to hear about the sensory deprivation tank!

Back at work this week after some time off and realised that I just really dislike my job. Going to start looking at ways to make a second income working for myself sooner rather than later. I have absolutely no idea what I’ll do but I’ve wanted to work for myself for years and just never been brave enough to do anything about it.

Good for you. There's nothing like the clarity that comes from time away. It must be your subconscious processing everything silently in the background in peace and quiet.

I work for myself. My boss is a dream! Exactly what I used to look for in a boss. My cat is my colleague. We have very small office parties together (tea and biscuits in the garden, except he doesn't realise he's having an office party).

I made a little roadmap of where I want to be in 12 months with checkpoints along the way and put it on the wall next to my desk. I've managed to tick off three already just by breaking things into baby steps so it doesn't feel overwhelming.

Thank you for this thread. It's really spurred me on for the second half of the year.

Hi can I join in - my priority at the moment is to become a healthy weight (am on a couple of threads for this and have lost 23lbs since approx11 April) I have also another under my belt in that I have increased my average steps recently, however my motivation has slipped in the heatwave. To be honest I could do with implementing a lot of the things yourself and others have mentioned. My house is a scruffy messy embarrassment! I want it to feel welcoming and organised.

I am starting tomorrow as we have had a family birthday and I am going for a nice pizza restaurant tonight with my kids so need to get back to calories deficit tomorrow. I would like to grow my list of thats ok, one thing a week maybe?

1. maintain a calorie deficit eating decent amount of protein and fibre with an average weightloss at m of 1.5lbs a week to hit ‘healthy weight’ by march 2027
2. walk a weekly average of 10k steps a day
3. improve my gum health through prioritising flossing on a daily basis (have a hygienist appointment booked with a new person and my gums bleed a lot in cleanings so want to see if I can really do something to prep my gums for next week!)

I could have written your post @Clearingaspace apart from the fact that I haven’t list any weight since April. I need to lose weight and move more and will start tomorrow as it’s supposed to be getting a little cooler. Gum health is all so I on the list and decluttering but I think I need to focus on the two big ones until I have better habits established