Constipation- someone PLEASE help me

[HelpMeMelpHe]

I have been constipated for 7 days. That may not sound like a lot but I usually go 2/3 times a day without issue. I was away on holiday and ate crap food and basically survived on crisps and pizza as I was so hot I had no appetite.

I am currently lying on the bed in tears, I have tried:
orange juice
4 suppositories
3 x enemas
putting my feet up
relaxing
black coffee
a special vitamin tablet which DP says always makes him go
Drinking loads of water
pushing from inside my vagina
actually trying to manually remove the stool (sorry for the way TMI)
sitting in a warm bath
massaging my stomach
dulcolex

ill be ringing my GP first thing in the morning but can ANYONE suggest anything else. I’m in a total panic, I can just feel the rock hard stool, I’m in agony, shaking and it hurts to walk. To top it off I’m on my period which I hoped would get things going but nothing. Someone please help I am desperate and I’m worried my gp will just prescribe everything I’ve already tried. I’m a nurse and working all weekend and at this point I can’t see how I can go into work which would leave my team in the absolute shit (pardon the pun). I don’t know what to do 🫨🫨

OP you're a nurse. You know you need a manual removal of faeces if several enemas have failed to produce a result.

Have you got a colleague who would perform one?

NRTFT but after surgery I was like you. It took 7 glycerin suppositories to clear me and I was screaming on the toilet.
Another tip is to massage your abdomen with patchouli essential oil in a carrier oil.

exercise… walking, ideally jogging. Always works for me just to get things moving. At least an hour?

You cannot go to work. If you were sick with anything else they'd have to manage without you.

Yes, this is guaranteed to work.

Get yourself to A&E and get some help you poor thing. So sorry you’re suffering

After a senokok didn't work for me I tried malibu and diet lemonade and it worked. A family friend swears by it. I hope you get some relief soon.

Magnesium lotion rubbed into your belly button and abdomen will give you overnight relief. It will clear you out completely.

DO NOT PUT ANY NARROW SOLID OBJECT UP YOUR BUM (weirdest thing I’ve ever written) as you could perforate your bowel and this could kill you.
Lots of good advice on here for the top down approach with laxatives and foods but at this point you will have a plug of poo and need the bottom up approach to shift that first, otherwise you’re only adding to the traffic jam.
Manual evacuation is your best option here.
A nice warm bath, then sit on the loo, feet up so you’re squatting, double glove with some Vaseline and hook a bit out at a time.
Good luck!

Stand up as much as possible.
I got constipated after prolapse surgery last year (so had the added fun of stitches!).

This is what worked/
Senokot max x 2

Standing up as much as I could. Gravity does work.

Walking.

Standing and bringing each knee in turn up to your chest then squatting and repeat until you feel some movement.

Lie on your back and massage your stomach like it's a clock face, starting at 8pm near your right hip and moving around the clock face in a clockwise manner.

Downward dog. Cat cow. Breathe in through the nose and out through the mouth pursuing your lips like breathing through a straw.

Mooing. I know but it relaxes your muscles.

Good luck!

Poor OP. Just wanted to say how much I want this poo out for you. Poos are the bane of my life. It’s not fair that you go on holiday to relax and then have the horror of this. I had it in France once, ate too many baguettes, patisseries and frites. God only knows how they are so thin. I carry movicol with me always now and watch my bowls like a hawk because I don’t want a poo ‘plug’ ever again!!

i recommend bifidobacteria supplements now for extra soft poos. Works with lactulose to feed up the softening bacteria 👍 optibac have bb12. Excellent stuff. Sachet of that every night before bed and you’ll never need to worry again 😊 I take it on holiday too.

good luck OP thinking of you

@HelpMeMelpHe definitely prunes in juice (don’t eat the stones, if there are any).

Laxido, Dulcoease and Dulcolax all work for me. Good luck!

Come on! What’s anyone here going to tell a trained Nurse about constipation that they don’t already know. It’s a basic. Of course there’ve been so many useful contributions including using Vaseline and a teaspoon up her anus. FFS. Meanwhile OP has disappeared.

You sound impacted at this point. You'll need to ring in sick. No one can help being sick and you are in no state to work. You could ring 111 and see what they say. Try taking those Werther's no sugar sweets with sorbital. They always make me loose. Drink loads of water. When you do go it will be like a cork being released and you will have a good clear out. You can't drive like it or go to people's homes.

I get them from the Asian supermarket. I suspect I have ibs. Most of the time I'm fine but I get bunged up and about once a month I get explosive shits that I have no warning of

Rubbing your fists together!? . . . a spoon!? . . . malibu!? . . . 😄😅😂

Oh God really?? 🤢

Movicol and lots of water. Try out of hours if you’re that desperate. I understand your agony. I remember suffering so badly when I was pregnant - it’s such a horrible feeling.

Massage your feet, really hard on the area that corresponds with the bowel.

50 ml of lactulose and loads of water throughout the day. You’ll be clear within a few hours. Don’t follow the dosage on the bottle it’ll take a few days to work that way

Have you tried squatting? Obviously you’d have to catch it in something but could help…

Also, and I know this is terrible advice….a cigarette?

What helps me is to go to the local carvery and pile my plate up with tonnes of veg and drink a pint ot real ale with it. I can't eat too much potato or bread as it makes my belly swell. I then go for a walk, within the confines of my back garden, it kind of wakes up my chitterlings IYKWIM. I usually get,stirrings and I don't ignore them. I think that my brain sometimes dissasociates from my bowels.Is that a thing?

@Peaceisenough I had to do this the other day and it was really effective but then I had bowel sounds unlike @HelpMeMelpHe as I
had eaten too much too fast

yourhealth.leicestershospitals.nhs.uk/library/chuggs/general-surgery/pelvic-floor-and-bowel-function/2193-massaging-your-tummy-to-help-ease-constipation/file

Can you bare to eat?

I know it's uncomfortable, but a decent sized meal helps push everything along.

If you've tried osmotics and they're not softening the stool enough to pass, I'd eat to cause pressure then take pain killers so if it works the pain of passing it won't be as bad.

Constipation is so awful.

You have my absolute sympathies, OP.