What are the worst cafe crimes?

[TheLastSherbetLemonInTheJar]

Yes I know that running is a cafe is incredibly hard and many are struggling but I wondered what your cafe/restaurant pet peeves are?

Mine include having only white sugar for coffee and no brown. It’s amazing how often this happens even in very nice cafes so I bought some brown sugar sachets to keep in my bag.

Margarine instead of butter. Of course they should offer margarine but I expect to be able to have butter(Unless I’m in a vegan cafe)

Teapots that drip everywhere.

This doesn’t really affect me but I always feel sorry for people who have coeliac disease when the only cake option is a brownie.

And a particularly petty one. When they remove my favourite item from a menu. I know that they have to change it sometimes but it’s so annoying when you can no longer get something that you’ve been ordering and enjoying regularly.

What are your little cafe/restaurant annoyances?

Me too.

I’ve left cafes and pubs (serving food) when there have been too many dogs in there.

It’s just unhygienic.

Slovenly looking staff
Dogs allowed in
Coffee not hot enough
Overpriced
Sticky tables
Whinging kids
Smell of deep fat fryer
Old dry pastries

Yes! I only drink Earl Grey. And black! It’s disgusting with milk!

THANK YOU!! Even worse is panini's (sorry)

Dogs
Spilly teapots
Uncleared tables
Costco cakes / fake cream in a Victoria sponge

When the 'Smoothie' on the menu is a splash of juice from concentrate blended with ice cubes! Looking at YOU Cafe Nero. It cost like £7 or something absurd, so I was thinking it was going to be actual fruit! More fool me.

Oh, also, 'milkshakes' that are flavoured milk blended with ice. No no no no no!

Those ridiculous sachets of mayo etc that neither man nor beast can ever sodding open! Drive me potty!

I’d rather have a few items don’t well than a huge menu of items that aren’t great.

Chipped crockery, stickiness anywhere, dirty toilets are all very off putting.

Lack of gluten fee options. Having a gluten free scone defrosted in plastic in microwave and then significantly smaller than non gluten free- NT!
Teapots that drip- frustrating. Coffee pots significantly bigger than teapots
Shit tea bags.
Tables too close together
Staff without hair net or tied back.
Thick mugs

It’s amazing just how many places do well generally but just cannot crack a decent pot of tea. Then often you don’t get extra hot water or there’s very little milk ( those teeny metal jugs).

Good thread OP

tables on top of eachother im not small so i have trouble manoervering in them

and when i ask for sugar i get one of those sachets that have hardly anything in them so ask for more and they always look annoyed

Asking my name for the coffee when there are only one or two other people in the queue. It doesn’t matter. Just make my coffee, we’re not in San Fran, it doesn’t have to be personal, it’s only a flat white extra hot.

Metal teapots that always leak and are so hot you have to wrap a napkin around the handle.

Dogs
Dirty toilets
Irregular cleaning during busy times
Rude staff - I've walked out of cafes if I've been spoken to rudely by staff. I'm not paying for the privilege of being treated like shit

Oh yes! And there's about half a teaspoons worth of condiment in each one. Even a 2 year-old wouldn't be impressed!

Fruit tea served in a glass cup or anything served in a glass cup. Just give me a normal cup and saucer. Large scones served on a small plate resulting in crumbs all over the table as it shatters when you try and cut it. The little butter packets that when you get them are still almost frozen and absolutely useless to spread on the above scone.

Spraying the next table with strong chemicals right next to where you're eating and clouds of it wafting over your food.

Weak tea bags

Deafening coffee machines. Long waits. Small cups for tea.

Uht milk, dry cake and tiny portions of cake 😭😭 also sticky tables and cramped tables. I use a walking aid and usually take half the tables with me when I try and get a seat 😭😂

Cheap and nasty hot chocolate that’s grossly overpriced and is neither hot nor chocolatey.

Synthetic and overly sweet cake (and I have a very sweet tooth!).

Sticky tables.

Panini with a tiny amount of filling. Yes, I’m talking about you, Costa.
(Edited to remove the S from panini. Hope it’s ok now.)

I was tempted to give up and probably would have if I'd been on my own!

That was the even more annoying thing though - the QR code took you to a menu but you still had to order at the till so after faffing around getting it open I had to rush and choose because of people behind me so I only read half the menu!

Shame because it's a new venture by a local, independent etc and the food was actually nice and fresh!

Shit air conditioning that I can feel blowing on me. Yuck.

I realise some people don’t mind, but I hate when cakes are uncovered in cafes. You don’t know who has been sneezing/touching them and they surely must be at least a bit stale.

Also, cookies where raisins/sultanas lurking within are not visible and are undeclared.

Oooh one I had recently at a national trust cafe, butter (in a little packet) that is so hard it’s rock hard and you can’t spread it on your bread. That made me a bit sad.
agreed that tea should not be as expensive as a fancy coffee, that annoys me, too.
although now I’m just thinking about how much I like cafes mostly!