What’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve read in a Trip Advisor review?

[peppermintgreengrass]

Currently on a lovely holiday. The Trip Advisor reviews of our resort are unrecognisable. Which has inspired me to ask: what’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve read in a Trip Advisor review?

Here are mine:

That the hotel had no private beach. When it wasn’t by the sea.

That the breakfast food was all cooked on request so you couldn’t see it before you ordered it. It was a tiny boutique hotel where they cooked you anything you wanted from an extensive menu so, no, it wasn’t a buffet.

That the kitchen area had a different worktop to the granite worktop shown in the photo. Because that definitely matters if you’re on holiday and not renovating your kitchen.

That it was hypocritical to promote fitness while simultaneously pushing junk food by - wait for it - selling ice creams beside an outdoor pool.

Whilst travelling in Thailand 5 years ago a review on a hotel read along the lines that they were annoyed as the cleaners had come in and cleaned too well where they now couldn’t find their dildo that they’d left on the television stand and later found it in a drawer. It had especially annoyed them as they have to use it everyday as they were a transsexual male to female and needed to ensure their new vagina didn’t close up.

Or the complaint that the "English food" (if pizza can be called that...) at the buffet was "samey" every day.

To be fair, it was samey. There were a half dozen buffet options and fresh cooked options that changed daily, but if you weren't happy with those, yes, it was pizza, chips or burgers...

TripAdvisor reviewers are a particular type of person. And not the type of person that you would want writing reviews about your business. Therefore, I do not read them.

A vegetarian restaurant didn’t have a meat option. After all of a meat restaurant has a vegetarian option?

That the staff didn't take her seriously enough when she told them there was a ghost in the room.

Wasn't this the review that complained there was no cafe at the top. Surely a wind up.

I see 'This hotel is not 5 star, it's a 3 star at most' quite a lot.

Star rating generally goes on facilities and amenities available and not level of luxury.

You can have a very luxurious 3 star and a grubby 5 star.

Shocks me how many people don't realise this.

What/where is this a review of?

"upon arriving I was shocked to see so much sand covering the ground and surrounding area. Now I was under the impression that they would clear this sand to make way for us but they did no such thing!!!! Instead we had to walk through the hot sand and it got all over me,,ruining my new dress!!! Horrible customer service. Don't recommend!!"

1☆ Review for a Chinese takeaway...
WORST ITALIAN FOOD EVER!!!

😂 Made us laugh so much we ordered, the Chinese food was lovely!

This one. It’s a historically important site and is Roman. Roman ruins. I despair.

“We visited this fort on Saturday- How very disappointing. Maybe i was expecting too much, i dont know. To me it was a few crumbling walls which looked near to the point of collapse in more than one place, with the Amphitheatre little more than a shallow bowl. It looks nothing like the pictures portray. i do not understand why it has not had some form of renovation.”

You are aware that business get no say whether they feature on TripAdvisor or not, but they can choose to pay a subscription to manage their page. Intelligent people will know what that means.

Look up "Bude tunnel". (Some people failed to realise it's a spoof)

Checking out reviews for a low cost AI in Turkey, in a lovely area and cheaper than most of the B&B options we were looking at. Most of the negative reviews were about the food including one with photos complaining that the hotel chef clearly didn't know what they were doing because the scrambled eggs were weird and spicy (photo was Menemen, a traditional breakfast dish, not scrambled egg) and there were olives and salad on the breakfast buffet (also traditional Turkish breakfast items) which is obviously just weird.

Wow - That happened to my sister in Benidorm, Westbrook latched onto them like a limpet and was a major PITA.

I'm watchingthe thread now, just to see if any other Daniella Westbrook in Benidorm stories appear. This must be a common thing I wasn't aware of, like a local tourist attraction....

Classic from Trip Advisor

We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our swimming costumes and towels

This isn't a holiday review, but I read a review of a washing machine recently where the person was saying that it was great that it had a separate area up top for cutlery but that it wasn't brilliant at drying things - sincerely hoping they'd accidentally posted the review for their dishwasher and weren't putting knives and forks in the detergent drawer and chucking the plates in the drum 😂

Thank you for that - hours wasted reading the reviews about a place that doesn’t exist 😂😂🙈

Not Trip Advisor but my friend used to organise a trail race in Hong Kong called "The Nine Dragons" and he used to get lots of 1 star google reviews from people complaining that their food, from a similarly named Chinese takeaway in Stockport, was cold and they didn't get any prawn crackers.

On a holiday to Morocco - someone wrote that too much food was cooked/served in tagines!

This was a Google review, rather than on Tripadvisor, but when we went to York there was a one-star review of the York city walls (you can walk on them most of the way around the old part of the city) which complained that you couldn't take dogs up there and the poster had a 'really well-behaved dachshund'.

The phrase 'but I've got a really well behaved dachshund' is now part of our family's lexicon.

Another reviewer had complained that the views from the city walls were...of York. Baffling.

There is a cafe at the top. Snowden sets the bar too high for Ben Nevis to complete (figuratively; not literally).

@NoBiscuitsLeftInMyTin
Wow - That happened to my sister in Benidorm, Westbrook latched onto them like a limpet and was a major PITA.

Was she the person who left the review on trip advisor?

Omg, is that what Daniella Westbrook has been doing for the last twenty years? 😂

That's somewhere between hilarious and deeply sad.

I read one once about some horse-riding holiday place, where the people complained that there was mud in the stable yard.