What’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve read in a Trip Advisor review?

[peppermintgreengrass]

Currently on a lovely holiday. The Trip Advisor reviews of our resort are unrecognisable. Which has inspired me to ask: what’s the most ridiculous thing you’ve read in a Trip Advisor review?

Here are mine:

That the hotel had no private beach. When it wasn’t by the sea.

That the breakfast food was all cooked on request so you couldn’t see it before you ordered it. It was a tiny boutique hotel where they cooked you anything you wanted from an extensive menu so, no, it wasn’t a buffet.

That the kitchen area had a different worktop to the granite worktop shown in the photo. Because that definitely matters if you’re on holiday and not renovating your kitchen.

That it was hypocritical to promote fitness while simultaneously pushing junk food by - wait for it - selling ice creams beside an outdoor pool.

Someone complained that they couldn’t sleep because of the sound of the waves on the beach 😂

Trouble is, a lot of people write stupid reviews like this because they're oh-so-hilarious, but it can sometimes be difficult to tell the difference between the piss-takes and the genuine idiots!

My pub got two stars on Google.

Our crime?

We didn't serve food.

In a wet led pub.

That doesn't advertise food.

Also, it was 8pm on a Sunday, I don't know of any food pubs locally still serving at that time. I did suggest there was a pub 30 seconds up the road which might still be serving, but no, she gave a shit review for not having a kitchen. I wish I'd have offered to make her some fish fingers of my DDs in the air fryer.

Some people are just wankers.

At my old pub where I was bar manager we had a bad review because she wanted Thai food and we refused to serve her it. It was a small country pub with a very small British menu. TripAdvisor refused to remove it though. She had clearly mixed our pub up with one 5 minutes away that had a very popular Thai menu beloved by the Thai community.

Not a review but a response by a business to any negative review whatsoever - "You have a lovely business, you really don't need to do this" or "Why are you so afraid of the competition? Your business is doing great" and some similar derivative. Designed, presumably, to have anyone reading it that they're being targeted^^ by a competitor....🙄

The guy is an arsehole and has the most absurd 'rules' at the restaurant & play centre he owns. Kids can’t play unless everyone in the party has ordered a FULL meal and not until after everyone has eaten.
No, you cannot just order chips, full meals only. If you dare to pull out a bottle of Evian/Buxton in the play centre (have to have water on me due to my medication) he comes striding up, snatches it, rips the label off and thrusts it back in your face whilst loudly declaring that Evian or whoever, shall not "profit from my business!!"

Dublin hotel had 'too many eastern European staff' which 'detracted' from its Irish charm.

What does wet led mean?

Perranporth beach:
”the sea was too far away”
and
”the sand was the wrong type for building sandcastles”
🤦‍♀️

I can understand simply mentioning in an existing review, that the sand isn't suitable for sandcastles as that info can be good to know for parents. I'd phrase it as it being a 'heads up' sort of thing. I most definitely wouldn't even consider giving a 1 star review because of that though ffs! 🤣

Drink only.

You have wet led- drinks only
Food led-more restaurant than pub
Mixed- both are popular.

Sorry!

I've been looking at going to Matera where there are ancient cave dwellings built into the hillside. People have booked to stay in "cave" hotels and then been surprised that the rooms are actually IN caves, dark, uneven walls etc.

Anyone who moans about the weather. Precisely what do they expect the hotel staff to do about it?!

The Disneyland Paris review which moaned that there were too many children there.

Actually, I kind of get what they're saying here.

Well that's true!

Also I belong to a Disney Cruise FB group and regularly read reviews or laments about how the cruise ship would just be so much better without so many children 😒 and how Disney should consider running adult only cruises…

I can’t remember specific examples but DH & I often feel we must be staying in a completely different resort/hotel to what’s described in the reviews! People complain about so much & really rubbish the staff - I think those people writing the bad reviews are more likely to be the problem. Treat staff decently, not like something on the bottom of your shoe, and hey presto you receive good customer service.

Well it does exist, but it's just the plastic covered way between the car park and Sainsbury's.

Things like “I arrived with my family for Sunday lunch at 1:30 and they refused me a table because I hadn’t booked, 1 star”

or

”I didn’t eat there because I couldn’t find it,1 star”

Daniella Westbrook was at a hotel I stayed in in Egypt once.

She didn't latch on to me, she was a perfectly normal holidaymaker.

Or “if I have to find a negative I would say the towels are a bit old”.

But you don’t have to find a negative.

Well no, but tbh I think that the information that that's the worst thing you can think to say about a given hotel is very useful.

'There was this annoying squirrel that broke our purse'. I booked it based on that, and we loved it so much we went back, and will do again next time we're in the area.

Any review that complains about local strays on the beach give me the rage. It's THEIR home. YOU'RE the visitor.

This isn't a ridiculous TripAdvisor review, but is a RL complaint by an American couple renting a small apartment from some peopleI know. They complained about being forced to use horrible old second-hand furniture. Beautiful, well-cared ANTIQUE family furniture, 150 years old if a day!

The beach was too sandy.

Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women.

No-one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled
We had to queue outside with no air conditioning.

Agree.

Things like having a pen and notepad by the bedroom phone can count towards ratings, lots of stuff people don't realise.