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I’ve just found out what DH did on his day off.

180 replies

TimeAtTheBar · 04/11/2022 12:00

He deep cleaned the house. Like all the sketchy bits, behind the furniture, the skirting boards, the dodgy bits of dust and grime in the creases in the window frames, degreased the extractor filters, all that nonsense throughout the whole house.

I only discovered it because I went to wipe a handprint off a door and, jif in hand, went to do all the doors. They were clean!

He didn’t mention it. Which is out of character as he can be a bit of a glory hunter wrt housework stuff. But he just said he was off work, kids were all out, I was at work and he needed something to do. He’s even descaled the kettle ffs.

This is untenable. How can I ever do pass agg cleaning around him now when he’s done six months worth of my jobs for me. Fucker.

OP posts:
Tillow4ever · 04/11/2022 13:15

LadyHarmby · 04/11/2022 12:04

Fucker indeed. Could you check the tyre pressures on the car to get your own back?

😂😂😂

TimeAtTheBar · 04/11/2022 13:16

ItsaMetalBand · 04/11/2022 13:14

How can I ever do pass agg cleaning around him now when he’s done six months worth of my jobs for me.

He passively aggressively did the cleaning that you normally passively aggressively do. It's PA gazumping is what it is!

It’s worse than that! He didn’t even say he’d done it until I noticed. That’s like passively passive aggressive.

Don’t worry. I’ll think of something to out do him.

OP posts:
shimmeringspice · 04/11/2022 13:17

OperaStation · 04/11/2022 12:15

Why do you refer to them as your jobs?

I think you need to calm down OP. He might have done a big clean but when was the last time he did any cleaning? We’re so quick to give men a big pat on the back for doing things that they should be doing anyway. I have male friends who are approached in public and congratulated just for looking after their own children.

Nobody writes a gushing post on the internet when I descale the kettle.

Oh lighten up.

AllotmentTime · 04/11/2022 13:19

Hate to break it to you OP but this weekend you’re either gonna have to put some shelves up or re-grout something.

Gazelda · 04/11/2022 13:20

I'm off work today. So far I've been to McDonald's for breakfast and watched Jane Eyre on tv.

You're now making me think I should bring the bins in that were emptied this morning and clean out the cruddy food pod. Bum. I don't want to.

Tillow4ever · 04/11/2022 13:21

viques · 04/11/2022 12:13

I hate to be the one to pop your balloon OP, but this is mumsnet, and a man doing all that can only mean one thing, he has a guilty conscience, oh yes, indeedy me, a really really really , guilty conscience. You must immediately put a tracker on his car and check his phone either for messages from unknown people known only by their initials , and also for the lack of messages from unknown people known only by their initials that he has cunningly deleted.

then ltb. Sorry .🙂

I dunno... I'd take a house being cleaned top to bottom as payment for him having an affair. Perhaps he could have 2 and I'll get flowers and chocolates too?

longtompot · 04/11/2022 13:23

Simonjt · 04/11/2022 12:11

I assumed doors were self cleaning…

I binged the new series of young royals on my day off, I then had to lie an act surprised when I watched the first episode with my husband.

I saw someones tick-tock on fb which told their viewers time to clean your walls! They got a flat mop out and washed their walls!

I bet he was giggling to himself the whole time @TimeAtTheBar Get those ducks all lined up 🦆🦆🦆🦆

PassThePringles · 04/11/2022 13:23

What the hell is all this? This isn't what I wanted to read! All this optimism is ruining a good Friday 😜 ltb, he's pushing boundaries and covertly gaslighting you and us.

HangerLaneGyratorySystem · 04/11/2022 13:25

You must be a troll. Or he is. How can a DP "see what needs doing" AND then DO IT? I don't believe it. I'm going to search your user name and see if you've posted other stuff like this. I will out you.

Yeah he saw what needed doing ha ha ha (jealous sobs)

ArabellaScott · 04/11/2022 13:26

YouOKHun · 04/11/2022 12:37

@TimeAtTheBar you sound as if you’re feeling out of control, disempowered, unsure of your ground - this is all because he’s gaslighting you with his sinister, underground Mrs Mop persona.

Take the power back; did he fold the end of the loo roll into a neat pointy shape? Did he clean the oven? No? Then this needs pointing out.

you MUST get your toilet ducks in a row.

😂

WimbyAce · 04/11/2022 13:26

Good lad 👍🏻👍🏻 Def a keeper 😃

TimeAtTheBar · 04/11/2022 13:28

AllotmentTime · 04/11/2022 13:19

Hate to break it to you OP but this weekend you’re either gonna have to put some shelves up or re-grout something.

😭 so true!

OP posts:
ArabellaScott · 04/11/2022 13:30

TimeAtTheBar · 04/11/2022 13:12

I’m getting back at home by putting all the clean laundry away. There’s stacks of it. That’ll show him.

The high ground is MINE.

Fine, but be sure to meta-passive-outwit him, by not telling him about how you're not telling him about the chores done.

I also suggest pre-emptively dismantling and deep cleaning the U bend perhaps with a cleaning product that will cause severe skin irritation and a Bravely Stiff Upper Lip about the subsequent bandages required.

Soubriquet · 04/11/2022 13:31

My dh does this every weekend Grin

All week the house is a tip. Then at the weekend he blitzes everything!!

I don’t do any cleaning. I can’t stand longer than a few minutes at a time and then I always suffer afterwards. So I have “permission” to lay in bed all day and do fuck all.

GetOffTheRoof · 04/11/2022 13:32

What an absolute wanker.

Time to sit on the sofa. Silent treatment him back into submission. Obv.

ItHasTheJuice · 04/11/2022 13:32

Could he be cleaning up a crime scene?

Priminister · 04/11/2022 13:33

CTB

Clean The Bastard

CantSleepCountingSheep · 04/11/2022 13:33

LTB

hallowedweens · 04/11/2022 13:34

Now you find out he gambled
Away life savings

CrackingcheeseWallace · 04/11/2022 13:34

LTB. definitely.

Then go on a spa day.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 04/11/2022 13:35

Bet he never checked the batteries in the smoke alarms or flipped the mattresses?

Ineedwinenow · 04/11/2022 13:35

LTB he’s having an affair ( I’ll pm you my address for you to give him)…..

Itisbetter · 04/11/2022 13:37

I think the only correct response is to tell him this is the most enormous turn on you’ve ever experienced. Have yourself a time and prepare for an extremely happy life.

Worrywart2022 · 04/11/2022 13:39

Showing my DH this post and hoping his competitive streak kicks in. I don’t think he even knows where the fucking mop is

WibblyWobblyTimeyWimeyStuff · 04/11/2022 13:39

LOL to cleaning up a crime scene!!!

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