Live parking!

[DailyMaui]

We have parking at the rear of our home - there’s six garages and space for four cars to park. Someone has parked across two of the spaces (one is where I park) and the only place for me to park and not inconvenience the other two cars belonging to residents is to block the CF car in.

We live right in a town centre so people do often park there and get really arsey if confronted. There’s a big private sign so it isn’t as if they don’t know.

Anyway, is it too early for wine?

Say you're just about to have a love in with your partner and he's taken Viagra so we'll be a few hours. Call back later. Byeee.

Car has gone. Bloody ungrateful teen.

You did it wrong. You should have ripped the neighbours in to make sure the CF car was surrounded at all times. I'm sure they would have helped if they have known the whole of Mumsnet was wanting the CF to get stuck.

Aw no! I look forward to more stories

I can’t find the bloody picture. I do have one of CF cunt driver in her car but that’s after she reversed out and was waiting for this guy she called to turn up and - I dunno - intimidate me? It didn’t work as by that time me and hairy dog were fired up and ready for fighting. Man came, man got in the car, they drove off.

I promise to start a new thread the next time a CF parks in my space. God I wanted a proper “drunk me versus CF” encounter and I was denied. Bastards.

Only one thing for it. Teen has to move out.

Well, the CF got away with it today so they come back to try it on again next Saturday.
Leave a nice big enticing space for them perhaps?

They might come back to try it on again ...
You could keep an old lipstick handy for any message you might need to write on the car

dailymaui I saw all the celtic fans in town today for the game and it was utterly heaving I couldn't get parked anywhere haha

........and a handful of birdseed to lure a nice flock to descend with some "Act of God" birdshit over their windscreens

It's your own fault, OP - anyone could have told you to install PENGUIN BOLLARDS!!

@DailyMaui

There’s only been one cheeky fucker repeat offender. It’s always worse before Christmas and I came back to find two spaces taken up by a large white, very fancy car. Knocked on all the neighbour’s door but it wasn’t theirs/guests so figured it was yet another mean arsed shopper who didn’t want to spend the £1.50 parking in the car park half a minute away. Despite its fanciness, it was quite grubby so I wrote “you park like a cunt” on the back. I didn’t block it in though as I was feeling generous. Christmas spirit an all.

About a month later it was back and again parked across two spaces (who the fuck does that anyway?) I was just backing in to block it when the owner returned. She tried the “ I live here” rubbish and when that clearly didn’t work she pretended it was her first time and she didn’t know it was private… So I told her that she still had the remains of “you park like a cunt” on her rear end and it was me who had done it the last time.

Ungrateful teen maintains she said 5.30 instead of . We have wasted very precious time.

This is the kind of drip feed I can get behind 👏

@3scape

Shame about the teen. We need a reciprocal MN taxi service to support fellow mn ers in acts of pissing off the cfers

This is an amazing idea!!

Daily Maui I really do think you should invest in some lovely large very bright very very very sticky (very hard to get off) stickers that say Private Property No Public Parking. Place on windscreen Drivers side. They would have taken a long time to get the sticky label off enough time for you to come home and catch them! Or if you did not return for some hours they would at least have spent their valuable time removing said label.

What happened op?

Place marking.

@whatdoIknowabout

What happened op?

Why dont you just read the OP's comments?

Yes I was on page 1 by mistake and thought that was the last!
All read now!

Are the spaces a free for all or do certain spaces belong to certain houses?

@DaggerIsle

Only one thing for it. Teen has to move out.

Or resign and get a job near a bus-stop!

OP, get yourself some parking stickers, nice large ones. Every time some jerk parks in a spot they are not supposed to put a sticker on their winscreen. Alternatively you can use cheese spray.

Bloody teens. Only ever think of themselves!

I hope you made the point to her clearly, that she’s messed up many peoples Sunday afternoon excitement and entertainment.

@3scape, put me down for anytime taxi services needed for parking situations in the North West of England or even parts of North Wales.

@DailyMaui

Very annoyingly I cannot see what’s happening from my house. So updates will be a bit shit

Throw glitter all over their car.

Make that C**t shine!

For the future, it may be worth you and your fellow residents looking into something like this: www.flashpark.co.uk/parking-enforcement/

In summary:

• you put (provided) notices up, saying private parking, charge £85 (or whatever you decide)

• when CF parks, take a photo and send it to the company

• they issue a ticket and chase CF for payment.

There are other companies providing similar services. Some you pay a one-off fee for the signage, some (like this) it’s an annual fee, others there is no fee but you get a cut of any parking charges.

But the main benefit is that people will only do it once….

Can I ask if the uncle Ebenezer is Ebenezer Goode? Because I've heard he's a main geezer.