Trapped toddler parents: Inspiration and support needed through the summer hols!!

[PinkDaydreams]

Following on from the previous trapped toddler thread!
Sorry for rubbish title!

Have proper mum guilt today. Had chat with DS at bedtime (trying to understand why he keeps talking about kicking me, standing on my feet etc, and tries to do it as well as asking for lots of cuddles) and he said he wants to be at home instead of going to nursery. I need and want to work/have some time with just DD and to get things done sovhis three days in nursery really help me, and school starts in just over a year. But we're only just at the stage where he can explain his feelings like that and it's pretty hard to hear him say that and know I'm making him upset by doing something I need. Being a mum sucks sometimes.

@prettygirlincrimsonrose totally understand that. Separation is hard for all children but it's something we have to do sadly to make everything go round. I follow this account on Instagram called @ourmamavillage and she has some good resources on things like this. Maybe you can set aside a special time once a day/once a week where he gets your undivided attention?

I'm currently at loggerheads with DM...DH and I don't put any photos of DS on social media by conscious decision, but we do share photos with our families via WhatsApp etc. DM will occasionally put these photos on Facebook without asking us first. I've let it go the previous times but today she literally posted 2 pictures maybe half an hour after I'd sent them, so I sent a nice message explaining that we'd like her to at least tell us before she posts a photo...to which she put "well I don't post many but point taken". All I wanted was an apology and understanding...feel like I should be posting this on AIBU I just feel so hesitant about sending any photos because I don't know where they'll end up!

Thank you everyone for your support, both DS are feeling a little bit better today and we had a better night. Not right yet but hopefully we've turned a corner.

How is everyone today?

@squishymamma I think you are right to be frustrated at that, hopefully you have made it clear what the boundaries are now.

@prettygirlincrimsonrose, ah, try not to worry. I think as the DC get older they are more able to express how they feel and they become more aware of things. I think it's usual for the older DC to feel like they don't want to go to nursery if they think you are having more fun with the younger one at home. My DS1 is the same so I just say he will have more fun at preschool and I'm just doing boring things at home with DS2.

How are you feeling now after your jab @Motherofmonsters?

I would be annoyed to @squishymama, I don't have any photos of the kids on Facebook either

Glad you're feeling they're feeling better @chocolatetrifle.

I'm feeling better @chocolatetrifle. Panicked this morning as my mouth started bleeding which i read some people had and then realised I sped ate some frosties so probably cut my mouth on that....

Sorry I haven't been on here much lately. I hope everyone is well?

Sounds like there's a bit of mum guilt going on....we all do our best and what we think is right for our little ones, it's normal to feel guilty occasionally.

Illness still going round as well from what I've seen on here, my ds has got a cold again and so have I!

DS finishes nursery this week for the summer. Has anyone any plans?!

@squishymama sounds frustrating, and would definitely be nice to have an actual apology, although hopefully at least having acknowledged it the posting will stop. Does she usually apologise?

@PinkDaydreams Taking DS out of nursery for August and hoping to have some days out while DH is off and then taking kids to my parents for a week when he's working (first reasonably long drive solo with both of them - hoping one stop for feeding/picnic/potty/nappy change/run around will be enough). For days with both of them will probably be on here/previous threads for inspiration! DS is currently into Hey Duggee so I might try and plan some things based on badges. And lots of trips to local parks/woods for picnics. Fingers tightly crossed for nice, not too hot weather!

Hi, sorry, haven't caught up but feeling awful.

Doing bedtime for twins and DD1 in shower - finished brushing DT1 teeth and he was lying on his back on our bed "going over it" with his toothbrush. DD1 called through that she had soap in her eyes and could she have a towel? I glanced at DT1 and could see he was away two feet away from the edge and lying flat on his back. DH was on the bed too. I thought it was fine so nipped through the door to get DD1 towel.

Then I heard DH call "stop rolling, STOP ROLLING" and a huge crash. DT1 had rolled off the bed for no reason with his toothbrush in his mouth. He fell face flat on the floor and jammed the TB into inside of his cheek. Blood everywhere. He was crying for ages, max dose of painkillers etc etc.

It looks like he just bit hard into his cheek so I haven't rung a dr - at first I thought 111 but then he stopped crying and was more normal, and I know there will be a 3h wait at A&E plus Covid risk so thought I should leave it. He is asleep now but feel so bad. I never leave my children on beds, but fgs he is nearly 3.5 and he was almost a body-length from the edge and not moving! I though surely it was fine for a minute.

Apparently not.....

😕

Good lord can I join? I am the keeper of a 16mo. Last weekend we ended up in the peads urgent treatment centre with very high temp. Given antibiotics and whatever the illness was cleared. This weeks fun is teething. Please can someone suggest any activities that'll distract him for any length of time?

Thanks for the support all, much appreciated. @prettygirlincrimsonrose my mother is notorious for never apologising to my sister and I (or her DH for that matter) and usually I let it slide but her response really annoyed me today...maybe because it was early!

@JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff oh wow, what an evening. Don't feel bad, I would have left him too - especially if DH was there. And it sounds like he's fine. We all have incidents like that (ref my hot water drama a few days back) and thankfully children are quite resilient! Hope you have a nice relaxing evening and can treat yourself to a favourite drink or snack.

@Chocolatetrifle glad to hear everyone's getting better!

Welcome @Letsallscreamatthesistene, I also have a 16 month old DS and distraction is 100% the name of the game. My DS is obsessed with putting things into containers and taking them out again, I bought him some big cars and a garage and he absolutely loves it. Though one of us always has to be playing with him...maybe something that might work? Glad to hear his illness cleared up.

DS was ridiculously overtired here last night and his whole routine got out of whack today as a result. Its also been really warm, almost 30 degrees in the shade. But today he soothed himself to sleep and it was slightly terrifying. As in, we put him in his crib awake, and he fell asleep on his own. Maybe he was just so tired he couldn't help it? Or maybe he's finally learning he doesn't require milk to sleep?

I have my first jab tomorrow, DH has been for his tonight - hopefully we won't both get bad side effects. It's a big birthday for me next week so I'm off for afternoon tea tomorrow with some friends, really looking forward to it!

I've been to A and E again this afternoon via ambulance, had to call 999 for DS2 who is still spiking high temperatures in the late 38's and he was panting this afternoon so I was stressed about whether he was breathing properly. Apparently he is doing it due to the high temperatures, he's had them continuously since Friday then the treatment for croup on Saturday. Anyone know how long croup goes on for? I've no experience of it at all. He is asleep for now thank goodness.

@JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff, oh love, sorry to hear about the accident with your DS. Hope he is settled and you are feeling better?

@Letsallscreamatthesistene, welcome . I have a 3.9 year DS and DS2 who is 19 months.

@squishymamma, good luck for your jab, birthday plans sound lovely too.

Sleep well everyone, hopefully

@Chocolatetrifle oh no cross posted - sounds horrible. Glad he got seen quickly though. We've never had croup, only false croup which is apparently a thing, and it only lasted for a few days (I'd say 3 or 4). They say with false croup at least that cold air can help them to breathe easier, is it possible to use a fan on DS? It was winter when DS got it here so cold air was easy to come by, not so easy in summer temperatures...hope he feels better soon. We also let DS wander round in just a nappy and gave him paracetamol when his fever got to around 39. Sending support to you, it's not easy when they're struggling

Oh Johnny don't feel guilty about leaving DS on the bed, lots of DC are sleeping in single beds/occasionally playing in their rooms by themselves by 3.5 - you only popped out for a second!
I'm sure he'll feel better after a good sleep.

Welcome letsall Is your little one walking yet? mine loves toddling about trying to kick a football. He also really likes any kind of lift the flap/feely books.

I'm feeling a bit sad/worried about DS2 today - he has a little patch of dermatitis and has been prescribed steroid cream, special moisturiser, and special bath stuff. DH has had really bad excema all his life and I'm worried incase DS2 ends up getting the same. To top it all off I pulled a muscle in my back lifting the laundry basket and spent 10mins lying on the corridor floor yelling at DS1 to get my phone for me. - don't worry I'm up now I did hobble about for a while though - luckily DH discovered there was ibuprofen cream in the bathroom cupboard.

Ooooh, can I join please? My DTs are 3.5, feral, and break up from nursery for the summer holidays at the end of the week! They’ve only been going to nursery for a couple of months but they love it and have taken so well to it that I have no idea how I’m going to cope without going completely bonkers.

No high temperatures here in the night or this morning so hopefully turning a corner.

Having a day in, got some bits out like the Magformers and foam blocks but watching Zog and Zog and the Flying Doctors and trying to get both DS to eat and drink.

How is everyone?

Oh my goodness I completely missed about your ambulance/A&E trip, you poor things I'm glad DS is feeling a little better now.

Ah don't worry @Camomila, both DS are looking and feeling better today and luckily DS2 has now started to eat a bit, he hasn't eaten since Saturday morning! Scary few days really but over the worst I think.

Thanks everyone. @squishymamma I took your advice and have bought some trucks/garage type toy. My DS seems to love putting things in other things too, and he also seems to really like trucks at the moment, so fingers crossed it'll be a hit!

@Chocolatetrifle how is he today?

@MuchTooTired my DTs are exact same age! Are yours boys or girls? Mine are b/g

Thanks for kind words. Intense couple of days. On Weds morning, DS woke crying, which he never does, and his face had swollen up massively and the bitten cheek gone all dusky red. I called 111 who said we'd get a priority callback in 20 mins as he was under 5. They never rang back. DH took the day off work to be with him and rang the GP surgery who didn't want to see him but said "give him ice cream and look out for signs of infection". Helpful!

I had to work but went to Boots on way home and spoke to young pharmacist who was actually some use and gave me teething gel with anaesthetic and antiseptic in. We had to force DS to have some but think it helped. His face is still swollen but less bad today.

Phew! And argh!

Hi, can I join? I was briefly on the first thread but quickly dropped off. I only usually have sole care of my DD3 one day a week as I work the other 4 days and then DH is around weekends. However am pregnant and due no.2 early Oct, will be on mat leave from early Sept and then will have the two of them alone 3 days a week for a year or so eek.

My DD has been unwell since Monday and got antibiotics from the OOH GP this evening as she's getting worse not better. Consequently I haven't left the house since Sunday and have had to be off work since Tuesday late PM. Going stir crazy and I shouted at her today too. I'm autistic and the sheer volume of her screaming is just massive sensory overload, I still struggle with it, I wish she would grow out of the shrieking!!

Sorry to read about all the other poorly little ones! There is soo much going round nurseries atm isn't there? My DD was actually mildly ill for a couple of weeks just a few weeks ago and now this. She is suspected asthmatic so coughs for months on end whenever she gets a cold too. Luckily we've avoided croup so far though.

Morning everyone, just catching up. How is everyone?

Welcome @MeadowHay, how is your DD today? Really tough when they are poorly, especially when you are pregnant too. Sending you support.

@JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff, how is your DS's cheek now? It's awful 111 didn't call back. I waited 7 hours for a call back a month ago for DS1. Pretty useless. Hope he is feeling better and you are too. It will take time for his cheek to heal up.

@Camomila, how is your DS2's dermatitis and your back?

Not much to report from here. Thankfully last night was the first night since last Friday that DS2 did not have a fever. He slept peacefully and didn't cough or get sick. I have asthma and developed cough (from the stress), cold symptoms this week, luckily my GP gave me antibiotics yesterday and I've just literally had my PCR test from yesterday through as negative. Phew. Hopefully we will all get better now. It's been an awful week.

Do hope everyone on here feels better soon.

It's supposed to be nice weather this weekend and next.

Morning all

@Chocolatetrifle DS2's steroid cream appears to be working magically thank you. My back is still a bit achy if I lean forward (to pick up toys etc) but could be worse!

What's everyone up to today, I'm working all day but tomorrow we are going up to London to visit the ILs. They have a really good playground 10mins from their house so we always go there if its not raining.

@Chocolatetrifle how is DS?

My DS cheek has gone down a lot but still swollen and nice big bruise coming up.

DD2 (DT2) got hit in the face by another child with a toy and now has a split eyebrow! Seriously.... didn't even bother trying to get anyone to look at that one 🙄

Oh how awful @JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff your poor DD2. What on earth has been going on this week at all with all these illnesses and incidents, it's like the universe is throwing us all these challenges? Enough now I think.

My DS1 is still on his antibiotics so as per usual he's acting like a crazy child as they don't seem to agree with him. dS2 is so much better but not better if you know what I mean? Still full of it but breathing ok and no fevers any more so that's something.

Boiling hot today so got the garden toys out but currently inside watching Peppa Pig .

Hope everyone is ok and has a good weekend.

I'm fantasising again about a weekend away by myself....

Hi hi and welcome to the new people!

Have been catching up with your messages, hope everyone/everyone's DC feel better soon. DS is still coughing but not so much, I guess if he's still going when we're back from summer holidays I'll take him to the doctor.

We've had a really busy few days, Thursday we went for an overnight camping trip in the forest with my BIL and his family. First time DS slept in a tent and he did surprisingly well! We camped by a lake which was lovely but also meant we had to be on DS the entire time because he loves water and so was trying to jump in constantly.

Today we had my other BIL and his family over for a barbecue. Need to pack as we're off to my in laws' cabin in the mountains tomorrow but I just want to sleep. It's also roasting here so we're making full use of the TV too, DS is exhausted but we're trying to keep him awake until bedtime!