One liners and quick posts on MN that have made you laugh?

[Snooks1971]

As in... tickled you.. have a wry inwards smile.. dare I say it have a silent chuckle? I don’t drink tea and so have never spat it out

There are tons... one from this week is from a thread where the teenagers had drunk all the milk at 2am leaving none for the OPs morning tea. What tickled me was a different poster empathising and saying that in a different thread the other OP had retaliated by “aggressively hoovering” outside their teen’s bedroom door.

Aggressively hoovering. Love it.

On the thread about expectations Vs reality:

I bought a sequin jacket that I'd spotted on Instagram. I looked like Lionel Blair in it. 🤣

@DaysAreGettingLongerNow

On the thread where a DS was in trouble for commenting his teacher looked like an 8 bit game. He was accused of meaning that she looked like an 8 [out of 10] and a bit game.

One poster said something along the lines of “Tell her not to worry, DH says she’s only a 2 and not game at all!”

That was today wasn’t it?! I was reading that whilst waiting in the car for my chiropractor appt Bloody brilliant updates from the OP As if her 9 year old was rubbing his thighs in a Benny Hill way and rating his teacher an 8 out of 10

@Fckingfuming

On the thread about expectations Vs reality:

I bought a sequin jacket that I'd spotted on Instagram. I looked like Lionel Blair in it. 🤣

That thread is in Classics I think? There was also a poster on that thread wearing a wafty white frock but she looked like she was walking around the gardens of an asylum on day release

'Postman splat' still makes me chuckle from time to time. I can't even remember what the OP was initially about but it was one of those threads that shows how quick witted mumsnet uses are

This thread title kills me..
"I bought a white coat in the sales to look like Olivia Pope, but I actually resemble a middle aged taekwando instructor"

🤣

Recent thread where posters confessed to fancying Matt Hancock and Boris Johnson.

Other posters accused them of ''voting with their fannies... the suffragettes must be turning in their graves''

Made me laugh!

@TiptopJ

'Postman splat' still makes me chuckle from time to time. I can't even remember what the OP was initially about but it was one of those threads that shows how quick witted mumsnet uses are

Wasn't it about a glass Pyrex dish and erm poop?

One of the first threads I ever read was if MNetters were Miners when the Mexican miners had just been rescued. I was in awe of the wit.

Wasn't a one liner but the poster that derailed her own thread with the most amazing of typos makes me laugh every time.

'Boil in the vag curry'

Fuck off then you spud cunt

I’M CANADIAN

@OhToBeASeahorse

Someone asking for middle names for baby Havana and someone replied 'oohnana'

I needed this today. And this thread!

There's a thread atm on terrible boyfriends and somebody posted a vivid description of absolutely shockingly terrible sex, the type to make you cringe and want to run a mile from ever having sex again. A poster quoted and asked if she ever considered writing erotic literature.

The other day about someone's friend had sent a pic of her kids in the bath and her fellas dick was floating in the corner of the pic, the first comment was about the penis floating by itself no longer attached to its owner 😆😆

@Nyctophyllia

Also someone complaining about the amount of swearing here and the first response was " off you fuck then cuntychops '

Love this

Penetration man. Mumsnet classics!

Anyone using this emoji makes me think they are a bit thick.

@Babymamaroon

Aggressively hoovering made me chuckle too.

The oldie "I snapped and farted" causes a smirk whenever I think of it

I never got snapped and farted at all - people found it hilarious and I still don't know why!

I was coming on to say boil in the vag but Ive been beaten to it. There was a recent thread where someone was asking how to handle an old man peering through her window. One of the replies "just close your shitters. Job done." I was helpless.

Bloody hell it's Colonel Gaddafi (said by a relation to a poster after a bad perm)

Someone had a perm and upon walking through the door at home, was greeted with, "Fucking hell, it's Colonel Gadiffi". 😂

I read snapped and farted 'live' as it happened and it just caught the moment and was hilarious!

The one where someone accidentally creosoted a pigeon and people were imagining all sorts of scenarios. Someone simply said that the pigeon flew home and his family said "Paul? Is that you?"

I don't know why but it had me in stitches.

Also ages ago someone was going on about Gandhi being misogynist towards women and someone (I know it was a well known name at the time, but I've forgotten exactly who) just waltzed in with "Yeah, that Gandhi. What a bastard."

On the thread about fancying Matt Hancock someone aptly described him as "a pudding-faced estate agent".