One liners and quick posts on MN that have made you laugh?

[Snooks1971]

As in... tickled you.. have a wry inwards smile.. dare I say it have a silent chuckle? I don’t drink tea and so have never spat it out

There are tons... one from this week is from a thread where the teenagers had drunk all the milk at 2am leaving none for the OPs morning tea. What tickled me was a different poster empathising and saying that in a different thread the other OP had retaliated by “aggressively hoovering” outside their teen’s bedroom door.

Aggressively hoovering. Love it.

@Inastatus

I was trying to search for the anal bleaching thread but inadvertently came across a similar thread to this from last year where posters were sharing the funniest things they’d seen on MN. Someone remembered a post about PFB’s and a new mum who spent the whole first night staring at her new baby daughter in awe at how anything could be so perfect and beautiful. She felt guilty showing her baby to other mums because she thought they’d feel bad that their babies were ugly in comparison. A few months later she was looking back on those first photos and was confused as it wasn’t how she’d remembered and said ‘JESUS CHRIST, she looked like someone just beat up Winnie the Pooh! that ‘oxytocin is some powerful shit’ 😅

This was me under another username!

I'm so happy I've made the thread!

I cant remember which poster it was or who she was referring to but apparently she'd 'only kick him out of bed to fuck him on the floor'.

There was a thread recently where OPs snake had escaped and was asking how to lure it back home.

Another poster chimed in that when faced with a similar snake escapee, they lured it back by getting a dead rat, bathing it, blow-drying it then sticking a pin in it or something.

I was in frigging stitches, the responses were comedy gold!

@Snooks1971

“And for the record, my private area is on display. I'm a BDSM fan. I don't want to have sex with the lights off and my cardigan on like lots of you”

This quote from the anal bleaching thread reminded me of a thread when posters had brain farts and called innocuous household objects random names:

What stands out is: Rug
Poster called it a: A floor cardigan

Still tickles me

I wonder what the Mumsnet Sex Cardigan looks like? It could be a satin edged waterfall Next cardi for everyday, Hush leopard print for special occasions?

There's a current CF thread about lending money with one of the most confusing OPs that I have ever seen. One of the replies is:

"Take the fox first, go back for the chicken, leave the fox on the other side. Take the grain... No wait"

Perfect response. Made I proper laugh.

Current thread about an embarrassing item found on kitchen worktop which apparently belongs of OP teenage DS. Much discussion as to what the item is, as OP being shy - majority favouring butt plug. However this suggestion has just sent me in to spasms of giggles -

"Could it be a vibrator and he was only using it to put some froth on his hot chocolate (not an euphemism) last night?"

This one made me laugh a lot this morning

Quote: Not all dado rails go round the room at sofa height. In the Victorian houses on my street, dado rails tend to be much higher up and used as picture rails

Response: That’s because they actually are picture rails, not dado rails.

@wellahair

There was a thread on here months ago about why the posters didn't go on a second date and one of the posters said

"He picked me up in a really old massive Mercedes, something Saddam Hussein would have driven about one in"

Still makes me chuckle thinking about it.

Oh god yes. That was brilliant. I'm laughing all over again!

I've just read a classic on men and performance cooking:

"The salad dressing he takes half an hour to prepare and which must be fawned over like it's right out of Gordon Ramsey's ball sack "

'Sun In with exposure to sun using mirrors could set you on fire'

From the anal bleaching thread. Made me cry 😂

The start of the penis beaker thread. I thought I had heard of everything up until then.

This thread has brought me so so much joy this evening. I'm pretty new to MN so can't contribute other than laughing so out loud at these comments. So thank you all!

Posting because bookmarking doesn't work on my phone.

The I pooed on my skirt at work thread. ‘I’m so sorry Alan ‘