Holding in farts

[Kittykat93]

I am so sorry to even make this thread but I need help. I have IBS, and have recently started dating somebody. We spend a couple of evenings together a week, and things are going well and I do feel comfortable with him.

However. I spend half the night squirming around feeling like I need to let rip! That sounds gross and I'm sorry but I really am a windy person and I can't help it I hate it :(

It's really painful and obviously I do go to the bathroom to let some go but I can't spend the whole night in there!

This problem sounds ridiculous I'm aware, but it's actually really getting me down. I was falling asleep last night and all of a sudden was awoken by a huge trumpet sound which I very quickly realised was me!!!!! Its because I'm holding them in all night!!

Please, how do I reduce this problem? Give me all of your remedies. I'll try anything.

Thank you if you've managed to read that to the end :)

BooFuckingHoo2 I know this isn't meant to be a funny thread but I am howling at your farty tale

I have a wind problem too OP. If we're downstairs I just get a drink or go to the toilet or put out a bin or something when he's out of ear shot. When we're in bed I'll make sure my arse is facing away from him, discreetly pull back the covers so the smell doesn't fester under them and literally spread the a-hole using my thumb and fore finger 🙈

As much as I'm really grateful for the suggestions and remedies, I am enjoying the fart stories

Okay that's what I need to do!! Get an Alexa and blame the farts on her!!

OP, you'll enjoy this, then:

(small boys + Alexa sound effects = Grandpa in joyful hysterics)

Jokes aside, hope some of the PPs' advice helps.
Miserable (and painful) for you to suffer in silence.
Your boyfriend will understand, I'm sure: it's medical.

Oh god I could have written this post (without the boyfriend, my arse is thankful that I'm single atm!!)

I ended up cutting out onions and that has helped loads but not completely. Mebeverine helped too.

But the thing that helped most when I was last in a relationship was how pleased my boyfriend was that I farted in front of him. He was DELIGHTED, said it proved that I was comfortable round him. And he always took fart bullets for me in public, bless him

So, you should just be honest. If he can't embrace you, farts and all, then he might not be the man you think he is!

Oh I would love for him to be delighted!! But he seems to be quite private when it comes to bodily functions.. I'd feel so much better If he just let it go too!!!

I have tears streaming down my face from laughing at the fart stories.

Just tell him! And not by text! If he's worth hanging on to, he won't care.

I held in my farts at the beginning with my then future DH. One day he let rip in front of me and I THANKED GOD for the green light. Pretty sure he's regretted it ever since - when he does one it sounds like a bomb going off, whereas mine smell like flowers do they fuck and he can't stand it!

You have a medical problem though, it's not that you're just disgusting and love everything about your own farts (disclaimer: I love mine).

You might find that he actually loves it and is willing to engage in a game of Fart Tennis...

What happened op???????!!!!!

@FeeFee832 I'm glad you revived this, I've had a right laugh. But I too need to know. FWIW the worst dietary culprits i've ever come across are meal replacement bars - I'm on new diet and have ulcerative colitis - the dogs won't even stay under my duvet. So loud, and soooooo disgusting. But I'm losing weight... prob farting it out.

For people who cut out carbs, what do you eat? I don't eat meat or fish so it's quite tricky.

I know it's not meant to be a funny thread, but I was in hysterics at some of the stories.

Also would love to know how OP got on!

@Kittykat93