Welcome to the Advice Clinic - Please come in

[pineapplebryanbrown]

Do you have problems? Would you like to hear solutions? My team of unqualified but experienced Agony Aunts and myself have a 100% success rate. We're very friendly and never judgemental. Even if you're riddled with the clap.

Do what i do, when the weather is bad enough that only a four x four will get through, curl up under your slanket (ideally with the fire lit) and eat snax all day. Also you can drink hot chocolate with brandy in at 10am as no driving can be undertaken that day. You do need an enormous freezer, but in the summer,that can double up as body storage, until autumn when the rivers flood and you can dispose of them that way.

Dog that does sound like you have all the body storage and disposal suited to West Wales weather, I commend you! Also, I would be near you in order for us to be closer yet never visit.

Dog what about people hating me for not speaking or even being Welsh - and indeed for being a "London type"?

I find a thick skin works well.
Also, no visiting and only venturing out for essential snax, although Tesco deliver, so I've managed to reduce my contact with 'the outside world' to a bare minimum.

Yes I would like you to move to Wales too! it's nearer to not visit me as well! [heart emoticon]

Aww DT we'd be closer whilst never seeing or speaking to each other, it'd be lovely. Or Herefordshire - that was pretty too.

Wax - loving the topiary.

String vests only if you do the sandals and socks combo. Maybe a hankie on the head as well

Raindrops - let him kick off and take you to court. You're not denying him contact you want what's best for your children. Keep all contact between you two as text/email.

Update about the hospital... Not looking good. To change trusts is very hard as this is what would be needed. Cannot get hold of the secretary. But spoke to GP who is suggesting have it in the main hospital which I am fine with, cannot fault their treatment. Also looks like psychiatrist will also be supporting this as unfortunately been referred back. Also going through PALS, so fingers crossed.

Sorry to bring the thread back down. But will post a joke to bring the lighthearted back.

Oh and welcome back thigh.

Small - We are still waiting for the joke!
I hope whatever it is you are needing treatment for can go ahead in a place that you feel safe and where you can recover without distress.

PALS is a good start. Good luck

I now realise my name looks a bit like I might be a fan of shaved fannys but I can't be arsed with any of that kind of topiary so any suggestions for new names welcome thighsters!

Waxawanker?

Waxawanker sounds like you might be offering a waxing service to wankers.
WaxAttackWithASharpImplement?
WaxATopiary? To advertise your skillz?

world you’re not bringing the thread down! The main hospital is better than the previous hospital? Is it with the same consultant or was the consultant not the problem? Tell us about the psychiatrist if you want, none of us is quite sane here as it probably obvious.

Are you very attached to wax? I like the sharp implements one. I wonder if TopiaryQueen is taken.

Hmm, I can leave Wax behind. I'll have a look.

Tada

Oooh wax , or TTWT, I love it!!

I am very annoyed. Or at least I would be if I could summon the energy.... I can no longer twiddle the bath taps with my toes, and now must sit up in order to adjust the bathwater temperature.

What can I do about this very pressing issue? Thigh, perhaps you could ask your plumber? Are remote controlled taps a thing nowadays?

Are you toes just too tired to twiddle. I love baths but sometimes I’m too tired to get out and they cool around me

Fucking typos

I’m getting ads for medical negligence now, you’ve officially arrived on the thread, world!

Too tired to read thread.. has the ZA already happened?

Good for you world ! Hope you get a good outcome.

This I think my toes were too tired to twiddle... (that sounds ridiculously rude!) but I have heaved myself out of the bath to eat a ready meal in bed #lovinglife#soblessed#singlelifeforthewin

world if we can pull off the zombie apocolypse, we’ll commandeer you a hospital.

just do you have any men kept in a cupboard somewhere who could come and twiddle your taps? We used to have some in a cage, but I think we forgot about them and they starved.

thigh the road was less busy, but we should have seen it coming. Coming from London, traffic is nothing compared to living next door to crack den or whatnot, but we forgot that it might annoy potential buyers NOT from London.

But never mind all that because things are finally moving on the house front. I’m going to have to join one of those buyer/seller threads! I definitely put this down to vibes from the cabal, thank you thisters.

Did you get an offer?? If so can I personally take credit on account of the professional work carried out in the grounds?

I did! It was definitely the topiary lady that did it wax. Plus I wore my string vest and threatened to cut their legs off at the knees. All the advice worked!