Trapped in a coffee shop because I’m being too British (LH)

[TaterHater]

I got a text this morning from a friend saying she was unwell and could we change our coffee date for tomorrow (no I’m working) but anyway- reply in the usual manner one does.

I decided to come into town and have a browse but coffee first- I grabbed my order and sat down and said unwell friend is in with a couple of friends and they’ve sat down. She hasn’t seen me yet.

I’m actually rooted to my seat and wondering how to get out without putting a bag on my head- no wait- I shouldn’t be embarrassed she should !

Every fibre of my being says sit and sip the coffee slowly and hope they get out fast or paper bag option.

What I really want to know is whether the cafe was doing badger and rice that day.

Drives me mad when people say they'll come to some meet-up or other and then cry off. You're a grown-up, surely you've got the wit to assemble the sentence, "Oh, not for me, thank you" or "Oh, I can't that day"?

AlexaAmbidextra

Shots fired

ooo er Tatler apparently you strolled out ' as proud as a ledge '

My ledge was adrenaline-pumped 🤟🏼👊🏽

The Mirror are waiting for an update, they must be refreshing with their wee thumbs on turbo.

So funny
Hope she sees it

I had no idea that tabloid journalism had stooped to snooping around MN!! (Well, I knew DM did, but I thought they were just exceptionally lazy/crap!)

Proud like a ledge, OP!! (Why oh why they didn't quote you as walking past them with your tits out??)

Unblock "sick" friend - if she gets wind of this she will be messaging you to fact correct "your" story!!

This has been great entertainment today!!

As a "journalist" would you not be embarrassed to be producing that and passing it off as a piece of work?????

As a "journalist" would you not be embarrassed to be producing that and passing it off as a piece of work?????

Really embarrassed, it's not even factually correct 😒

The journalist can’t even do basic comprehension.

This is not just a journalist, this is a Mirror journalist...

They are not even a journalist, I see they are down as “audience writer” whatever one of those might be.

I don't have time to read this thread, but I want to be on it

Lol I shotgun this for Classics!!

Just caught up after arriving via the Mirror. Well done OP!

You are to good for her and I hope she gets food poisoning from her Xmas turkey!

Oh I do wish I read this in real time 😂 excellent

Best thing I've read all week 😂

Hoping the daily fail can create a picture, complete with chest ledge minge ledge and naked teeth in a jar... good luck with that! Actually, first mumsnetter to provide a diagram of all relevant ledges, teeth, nakedness and bots- gets half a mars bar and an asda receipt!!

Best thread for ages.

Sorry about your shitty pal, OP. You sound ace.

Nothing from her- no text.

A message from someone on FB that knows us both who’s suggesting she knows what’s happened from my status.

Ahaha- i bet it’s so called “friends” sock puppet, it must be.

This is weird.

That or you are not in the privileged position of being the only person she has ever cried off on and then been caught in a lie.

Still no word OP? Is it likely this is someone you will
Bump into again?

Post the newspaper link on your fb page 😂 This is too funny. The only way to redeem herself is to totally own she's messed up and beg your forgiveness 😂

what @Spotsandstars said!!

Must put Miirror link on ur SM page.

You should have took a photo of them on your phone and text it to her with the caption "glad you're feeling better"