Neighbour embarrassment!

I can beat that. My 5yo really liked playing with a boy in his class. I asked the mum if she fancied a playdate, and she seemed reluctant. I pressed a bit and said why didn't she take my number so she could message when she was free and she could call me so I had her number. She took it, looked me dead in the eye as she called me - and it came up as private number. Then she walked off 😂
So overall, I think you're doing better than me.

Nope! And they are still in the same class and still really good friends! Took quite a lot of effort to brush that interaction off and I still see the mum (as she looks right through me) most days...

We had a note from a nursery mum asking for a play date with her number. I thought it was wonderful but when she found out I worked full time and could only do a weekend she just stopped replying. Such a bizarre interaction 🤣

This woman might be my new hero.

Imagine having that much confidence.

I know! I was slightly awestruck!

Personally, I like to keep my neighbours at arms length , I don't want to be in a Whatsapp group with them or them have my number.
I like my privacy and being able to say hello when I see them and walk on , I'm happy to help if a neighbour was to knock my door and ask for a lend of something if needed, I would also take a package in for next door if the postman knocked but I don't want to be involved socially with them, each to their own obviously but this is just what I prefer.

What a rude bitch that mum is!

I think you just need to relax a bit.

It can take time for people to reply. When we moved in here, a neighbour came and introduced herself and we were both pregnant with similar age older ones. Then I put a card through the door with my number in and didn't hear anything for weeks but suddenly got a text saying the card was underneath something and she'd only just found it.
We get on well now.

The other neighbours seemed really keen to be friends and then snubbed us a couple of times and then seemed keen again. I think they were just busy when we thought they snubbed us because they do seem to want to be friends.

But you only sent her the note two days ago! I think you’re being very unreasonable to expect her to drop everything and reply straight away.

I absolutely think it’s this - they don’t want to get into habits of watching each others kids / them coming and going and knocking on each others doors etc. Please don’t take to heart just say hi if you see them and leave it there! No need to be embarrassed.

Yes! Why are you so hysterical about her not having messaged you within 48 hours???

That’s not mortifying at all. You gave her your number. So now she has your number. She also knows where you live. Maybe one day she’ll be in touch to arrange a play date when the kids are older.

Or maybe she’ll be in touch in a week or so! I mean, I doubt I’d have responded to the note within a fortnight. It’s not a time-sensitive issue!

2 days have passed. If anyone in my life expected me to respond to anything that quickly - well, they would be disappointed.

Are you regularly “mortified” by this kind of social interaction?

….ooooh, was she Amanda Hughes (actress Lucy Punch) from Motherland? 😃

It’s too soon. Relax a bit

It can feel a bit awkward when this kind of thing happens - you question yourself and whether you’ve overstepped boundaries or behaved in a way someone else perceived badly. It might be she will connect but you’ve fallen down the list of priorities. Seems a shame if you don’t get together!

This. If she wants a play date she’s get in contact, if she doesn’t she won’t. It’s literally what you put in the note.

Exactly

Give them a chance!

A neighbour seemed really keen to come round and look at my new en-suite installation. I said to come round later, after dinner about 7. I made sure we’d eaten and cleared away and looked forward to seeing her. She never came.

People are weird. I feel awkward now about seeing her.

It's only been two days! The mother may be socially anxious/insecure herself? She could be run off her feet with the little ones? Possibly, they are examining their calendar so they can come back to you with dates they are definitely available? ...Or maybe, they have some more pressing matters going on right now, and everything (including your invitation for a playdate) is on the back burner, for now.

I know Mumsnet loves to think the worst of people. As well as assuming that everyone does everything with pernicious intentions. Luckily though, in real life, most people are decent, and genuinely don't wish to upset others🙂.

There's also the chance the note might have been missed. It does happen. Either it gets stuck to the bottom of someone's shoe, or sometimes toddlers/young kids pick up letters that come through and make off with it (...according to my mum I went through a fixation of stealing the post, so that I could play 'post office'🙄!).

If in worst case scenario, they never get back to you:
Then you are in the same place you were, had you never written the note. You haven't lost anything. You certainly have absolutely nothing to be mortified about. I think it's lovely you wrote a friendly note. It sounds sweet, and 100% appropriate.