To not be ok with race-based segregation?

I remember that @Smellslikesummer and feeling sad that black people have to have that chat with their kids so they don’t get shot by the police. This is one of the reasons a white person could never begin to understand what it is like. I can’t even imagine how awful it would be to have to consider this day in, day out.

@LusaBatoosa I have a friend who was sexually assaulted by a gang because she was white. Perhaps she would be more comfortable speaking in group therapy to women who also experienced this type of offence?

I'm a lesbian. On Saturday I attended an event that was for lesbian women only so that we could talk and dance and enjoy each others' company without having to deal with the male or straight gaze. We didn't have to explain ourselves. We didn't have to feel self-conscious. We didn't have to deal with the unconscious homophobia we are sometimes subjected to by even the most right-on of feminist women. We didn't have to talk to men while wondering whether they are particularly fond of so-called lesbian porn. Or engage in smalltalk that requires us to out ourselves and face that millisecond of silence while our interlocutor processes the fact that they're dealing with someone 'other' whom they'd assumed was like themselves.

I don't have any truck with all the 'whiteness' and social justice nonsense around at the moment, but I can absolutely understand why people of any minority like to get together without others there so that they don't have to deal with other peoples' stuff. Being a minority isn't easy, even in the most enlightened of circles.

Really? You can't think of why white minority groups like Irish travellers or Ashkenazi Jews might want their own groups where they feel safe and where they might be able to discuss their own unique culture and concerns? Do you not know about their historical oppression?

You’re embarrassing yourself, now.

Genuinely, thank you for the links.

I had a high risk pregnancy myself (twins) but once the babies were there it was all about them
so I don’t really get the argument about wanting to share with others having a similar pregnancy experience. BUT the social/historical aspects discussed in the last article you linked make sense.
So let’s say I’m not convinced it warrants having a restricted group but I understand/accept that others might feel that it does.

White people can be part of a minority group, but the minority is not their whiteness.

Those are minority groups. You had to qualify or caveat their whiteness. You clearly see how that’s different as you’ve highlighted their unique culture and historical oppression, so unsure what point you’re making.

But they aren't meeting because they are white, they would be meeting because they are Jewish or have traveller heritage. And technically they may not even be white.

Oh, so you've come in, dropped a bomb and now because things haven't gone your way you want to delete it? And people who disagree with you are =n't prejudiced, but people who don't are?

Mumsnet, please let this thread stand as testament to this poster's opinion.

I agree with @Pluvia None of the people pointing out that OP is wrong have done anything to justify deleting the thread. she's just upset that only 2 posters agree with her.

Maybe, just maybe, someone reading this thread will have a "oh" moment and learn something.

I really hope Mumsnet don't delete it. Important conversations should not be hidden.

You still don’t get it. It doesn’t stop at birth. Black babies are three more times likely to die than white babies:

https://amp.theguardian.com/global-development/2023/nov/09/black-babies-in-england-three-times-more-likely-to-die-than-white-figures-show

https://www.bliss.org.uk/news/2023/nhs-race-and-health-observatory-report-shines-light-on-inequities-in-the-care-of-newborns

And bias against black children starts in nursery:

https://metro.co.uk/2020/08/19/children-are-suffering-racism-nursery-cannot-turn-away-13149595/amp/

And the fact that I’ve just had to explain all of this to you is yet another reason the groups exist. Black women do not need to explain this to each other (or have their need for support questioned at a time when they are most vulnerable).

What a shame you didn't start it without prejudice

This is social media you don't get to just stamp your feet and decide everyone has to shut up just because they are saying things you don't like

In particular when black posters and mixed race posters have been answering in good faith, shutting down the conversation because some of them are saying things you don't like absolutely shows why they might need their own spaces sometimes to discuss things

LOL, I suspect just one. The other one is her tag team partner IYKYK

According to the poll, 48% of people reading this thread who voted agree with the OP. That is approximately 166 out of 347 voters at the time of writing.

😂😂😂

Yes, hopefully those who would not have understood why meetings like this are important, will begin to think about why they really are. Hopefully some good will come from this thread, despite what the OP is trying to achieve.

Why would this thread end soon?

There is room for another 800+ comments

Even that alone highlights the need for such meetings.

So you want BAME people to explain to you why you shouldn't be racist? There's not enough information readily accessible for you, you need them to spell it out for you?
I'm always puzzled how those who preach anti racism are often the least tolerant ones in the way they share their views. Aggressive attitude really goes against tolerance.

I consider that learning and knowledge is forever evolving. It's not a case of learning the truth but being open minded and listening to every individual's needs.

I hate putting people in boxes and hate being put in a box. I am not white. Well I am but this is not a word I would ever use to describe myself because it doesn't define me. I am so much more than 'white'. So I don't ever make assumptions on anyone else because of their skin colour. I don't assume they must been persecuted, regularly discriminated, racially abused because they might or might not have. I would listen to their personal experience and empathise.

I suppose that a poor black person living in a predominantly white area is going to experience a very different life than those who have been educated in private school, earning a high income living in a diverse area.

Everywhere in the world, people like to mix with others who share similar experience, that's totally normal. The key issue here is that these get together are referred to as 'parties'. Until we understand the context of these 'parties', who are we to judge if they are appropriate or not?

2/10

Must try harder