23 and 18?

Your daughters sound bitchy AF.

They are at different life stages. It’s not so big of a gap as to be ridiculous, but he should be very careful. it would be easy for him to dominate the relationship since he is more established.

my own dd of that generation has similar strong feelings about age gaps. She and her friends tend to be very sensible about dating and relationships. They have no patience for behavior they perceive as predatory and really look out for one another.

i wouldn’t disparage your daughter’s. The relationship pings their radar for a reason, even if they ultimately need to respect the young woman’s autonomy. It also shows they are sensible and will likely be careful themselves . I wouldn’t want to make them doubt that cautious approach.

No, same age difference between me and my husband, I was 18, he was 23, 31 years of marriage later, and 3 gorgeous children later, still going strong. However I remember my mum not liking him at 1st, as he was too mature for me, now, they are best pals!!

I wouldn't have felt it was weird at 18, but at the same time when I was 23 I couldn't have imagined being attracted to an 18 year old. I don't think it's especially unusual though.

Looking back with the benefit of hindsight, I do see the older men who approached me when I was 18 as creeps even though at the time I didn't think much of it. Not the 23 year olds, though, that still feels pretty comfortable to me - more the 25+ ones I would say.

Agree with PP that attitudes have changed/are changing though, and your daughters' opinions are just a reflection of that.

Wow people have got some nasty things to say about OP’s daughters who are just expressing their opinion. Sometimes young people like OP son aren’t aware of power dynamics and maybe his sisters are a little more alert to the possible weirdness of that given they are girls and nearer his girlfriend’s age.

18 and 23 isn’t necessarily unhealthy but it easily could be, because lots of people esp men pick younger partners because they feel “automatically” superior to them and want to take the upper hand. Plus with an 18 year old she’s unlikely to have left home (or not long) and had an independent life etc as he has. I wouldn’t say he was wrong I would say he needs to be really careful to ensure it’s an equal relationship.

My DC (23 and 19) would think the age gap was too much. I don't.
What would bother me is the work situation if they were to split up.

Normal to me, but I was 19 and DH was 25 when we started dating (nearly 30 years ago).

I was 19 and exdp 29 when we got together. We’re together for 14 years.

I was 21 when I met my now husband ☺️, I’d literally just left uni. We worked together and he’s 10 years older and was my senior at work. Nothing happened between us until a few years later when we randomly met in a local pub on a weekend after we’d stopped working together and we both admitted that we’d been drawn to each other. 10 years on we’re married with a baby and still totally in love! If only we hadn’t been so worried about what others thought we may have got our acts together a little sooner 😁.

I don't think it's a problem. But I agree lots of teens today think age gaps are creepy
If she was starting uni full time and living a student lifestyle they may find it didn't pan out, but a degree apprenticeship she will be working, they probably won't notice an issue.

”Plus with an 18 year old she’s unlikely to have left home (or not long) and had an independent life etc as he has”

I know you weren’t criticising the gap, but I want to point out that he’s not necessarily had that much of an independent life at 23.

Ok, so he’s been to uni, unlike her, but plenty of recent grads still have a lot of maturing to do. And with house prices as they are, there’s a strong chance he’s not living independently yet - going by statistics, he’s probably living with his parents.

She’s working and will be more mature than many uni 18 year olds.

It’s fine. As someone else said a lot of 18 year olds still see themselves as not quite grown up ( as do their parents) but others do.

It has fuck all ti do with his employer!!

Well it does, as they both work at the same place and there could well be a conflict of interests. Some employers are not comfortable with relationships between employees, and most will request for such a relationship to be declared, regardless of ages or age gap.

It's basically got nowt to do with your daughters has it .

My dd is 18. I would be concerned about her going out with a 23yo tbh.

It isn't so much the age gap - 5 years isn't that much at all, and would be fine if both parties were a bit older, but I think it's a lot at that age.

My dd has a friend who is with someone with a similar age gap. DD and her friends all find it inappropriate, so I don't think the OP's dds are unusual.

OP did your DS go to uni? If he did, then I can see they are at a similar life stage - in first “proper” job post education, he might be a year ahead, but she’s in a similar stage. She’s probably got more in common with your DS than an 18 year old at full time uni or a 18 year old who’s in a dead end job.

It's interesting that most people seem to think this is fine. I am struggling a bit to see how an 18yo and a 23yo could have an equal, balanced relationship. One has so much more adult life experience than the other.

If he is her boss everything! It could be classed as sexual harassment. They aren’t 16 year olds working in the local McDonalds.

if I was his boss and we brought in an apprentice and he was a mango g her then started dating her I would be less than impressed.

and we are just having a conversation - no need to the over the top reaction.

Perfectly fine but you should ask your daughters to tone down their complaints. They sound mean; to call their brother and his girlfriend creepy is not respectful.

It's absolutely fine.

It's absolutely nothing to do with your daughters either!

18 and 23 is too big a gap and IMO creepy she's only just became an adult. 5 years gap when your brain hasn't even finished growing (ie under 25) is a huge gap. I'd be concerned your son is chasing teenagers. When I was 18 and that was many years ago, 23 year olds didng want anything to do with us and we were seen as kids or babies by 23 year olds. You grow up so much and experience a huge shift from 18 to 23. There have been pedophiles that are men in their early 20s, he was effectively grooming her before they got together if she has only just 18. 23.perving on a 17 year old..eew
Your daughters are right, he is creepy.

The younger generation are much more sensitive, uptight even, about age gaps. (Due to all the social anxiety about pedophilia I believe), but I don't see any problem here at all. I think your DDs reactions reflect this newer mindset. But if I were you, I'd be pleased for my DS.

If I was the woman's mother I'd probably be a little wary. No more than that- but certainly a little wary. 5 years is a long time at that age. Knowing she was his first girlfriend would make me less wary, though....

I don’t see an issue at all, sounds completely reasonable to me. I know a couple who got together at 16/30 which would be quite frowned upon these days but it all worked out well.

When did they begin their relationship?