Surely he can't get away with this....

[MusicMakesItAllBetter]

DPs department is the only department to not receive a pay rise.
They were due to have one as it was a whole company increase but it didn't happen..... And now DPs dept manager has said the big boss told him that it won't be this year and that he doesn't give a fuck (the big boss).

Like... What the actual fuck????
I bet he got a lovely pay increase and bonus though.

Without this department they wouldn't have the parts to make what they make.
They are assembly operatives.

DP is reluctant to go to HR as he doesn't want to get his boss into trouble. I said that it's absolutely not ok for the CF to say that and he is within his rights to complain/contact their Union.

I'm not the right person to fuck off at the moment as I'm quite temperamental and I think, he can't get away with this surely? 🤷🏼‍♂️

Advice gratefully received.

I was imagining you storming into his bosses office telling him to stop fucking around

🤣 that really made me chuckle, thank you it was well needed 🫠 as much as I would have loved to have read him the riot act of injustice on behalf of the whole department and there were scenarios going through my mind I'm not that unhinged 😆😁

I have ADHD and perimenopause and I was due on yesterday I think but who knows when it'll come plus it was the full moon. I have 2 mental kids and there are other people on the road when I have to drive so I can get a bit worked up 🤔 I've had a headache for two days. Oh and the travesty that I have to pay to park at work and it's pay by phone and they rob me of 20p every time I have to park there
£2.90 + fucking tax.
£3.10 total. What the fuck is the 20p for?????? My god I hate robbing bastards. Maybe I will storm his office after all 😉 come with me for solidarity 💪🏼🙌🏼🫵🏼🖕🏼 (the last two are not for you)

I've had a headache for two days.

So have I! Can't shift it. I have found my headache twin😆

Hope your head is better now

But it is up to your DP to deal with it. It is his job ot yours.

His big boss isn’t scared of you and doesn’t answer to you, OP. Stropping on about hormones makes you sound like a silly teenager. Your anger makes no difference to the business.

I’m afraid I agree with this and I really dislike it when women blame poor behaviour on being hormonal. It gives us all a bad name and feeds into the stereotype. Just own it, instead of blaming your hormones.

Not to mention the ADHD. I've got ADHD and I'm fed up to the back teeth of seeing people on here and elsewhere use it as an excuse for poor behaviour. And then wonder why ADHD and other ND conditions are stigmatised. I don't tell anyone IRL that I have it because of all the stigmatization.

I don't care what you think of my manner/presentation.
That's not what my post was about.

I was asking if my DP boss was allowed to do what he's done because botH DP and I think it's outrageous.

I was angry and riled up when I made the post and I'm not sorry at all for saying my outburst was hormone fuelled. I did also point out that life is chaos and stressful but you go ahead and belittle another woman for speaking of something that we all experience. And if you don't, jolly good for you 👌🏼🫵🏼💪🏼

How my hormones behave with me is individual to me. If you think that gives women a bad name and feeds into the stereotype (whatever stereotype that is because I haven't got a clue what you're talking about), that's fine because it's your opinion and guess what.... You're allowed that.
But to tell me I'm wrong because you don't agree with it.... Whatever 🙄

I think maybe posting on a public forum is not for you....

Is this how people genuinely treat their partners? The idea that his employment is none of her business is just wild.

Massive difference between discussing something and telling someone what to do though.

@MusicMakesItAllBetter Have you looked at the suggestions I gave days ago and has Dh followed up on any?

I

I did and I passed it on.
Unfortunately DP has some flu/chest thing and hasn't been in work since Wednesday last week so nothing has come of it yet.
I absolutely appreciate your advice though, thank you and thanks for checking in

And he will sort it out.
He needed encouragement and guidance, that's all.

I'll say the same thing as I've said already.

How others handle/present their ADHD/hormones is great for them.
Everyone is unique and I am genuinely happy to hear that you don't share the shit that I go through. Because it is shit and I try to control myself, I mostly manage but sometimes I just can't hold it in. And that should be ok too.

I love having ADHD (diagnosed last year). I finally understand my whole life after 46 years of not understanding anything.

Im in perimenopause which pre HRT was completely character changing.
I went from patience of a saint to not being able to tolerate my own children and hated DP. The rage I felt was like those bulls you see in Spain and America raring to go at any given second. It was awful because generally as a person, I love everyone and everything. I'm a cheerleader, a pillar of positivity so it really was a savage change and I'm still trying to better this.

I've been in therapy and have learned to allow my emotions to 'be'. I have to allow my anger to show up so I can get to the root and nurture it. This means I can be a bit hot-headed. I may not word things correctly. None of this is wrong.

I have 2 ND kids, one of which was groomed only last year and exposed to god knows what and is displaying behaviour at school that is alien to us as well as baffling behaviours at home.

I have said that life is chaos and stressful.

I think to make negative comments on how they are for someone else, especially if you don't know them, is a bit shitty because I wouldn't do it personally because, what the fuck do I know? How do I know how it truly is for someone else?

So if I come across as a bit of a cunt, now you know why 🫠😶‍🌫️

I'm sorry that you feel this way, about the stigmatisation.
I have found it a good experience whenever i have had a conversation about it (I don't go around bringing it up fwiw).
People have been understanding and they've asked questions and genuinely seemed interested to learn about how it has affected me over the decades and especially since my diagnosis.

Generally everything has been a positive since I got diagnosed.

I have been the boss in this scenario - A male employee in his late 30s, two kids, who's wife was constantly calling/trying to get into the office to complain about things.

Absolutely insane and awkward as fuck 😅

She used to call in sick for him, and then kick off when I told her he needed to do it himself 😭

Now that is barmy lol

I have been very ill and DH had to call in sick for me. I had to go to hospital in the end. Cannot see why a very ill person is required to call in themselves. Never seen that as a contract of employment.

It’s normal for partners to be concerned about pay and the family finances. Totally normal to think what might be the best course of action and the op is consulting on that.

Thank you.
I know my initial post was gun-ho! and a bit mental but it really was a vent more than anything and wanting others opinion on if the Boss was ok to do this.
In support of my DP.

Sorry to hear you're unwell. There's lots of it about and I hope you get better soon x

Imagine some departments have evidenced some kind of additional value in the last year - for eg around savings, quality improvements, innovation,’or
their areas have experienced a market increase in salaries and so those departments need to raise salaries keep
the staff, while your partner’s department has done the work it was paid to do, or has caused issues in quality, costs rising, staff complaints/culture stuff, that makes big bad boss not want to reward them equally.
can you prove that big boss officially said that about “everyone will get a pay rise” or is it hearsay?

I wasn't there so I can't prove it but my friend who also works for the same company has told me it was company wide. My DP isn't a dishonest person so I do believe what he says.

I genuinely believe that the boss has said fuck em for no reason