Will be ugly and fat on my wedding day! 😖

[CutiePatooties]

Posting in hope that other brides felt this way and can tell me that on the day it didn’t matter?

HOPING.

3 weeks and 4 days to go and I’ve only lost half a stone since giving birth 5 months ago. Had hoped I’d lose the stone and a half I’ve put on through pregnancy. I’m also not very pretty, and being fat makes my face look even uglier than when I’m slim.

anyone else felt this way on the lead up to the big day?

did you change your mind once the day arrived and you were all glammed up etc?

my bridesmaids are size 10, gorgeous, curves in the right places. This also fills me with dread! They can’t help being beautiful but I’m hating the thought of looking even uglier in comparison! Some days I feel like cancelling it altogether or postponing until I’m in a better place.

Me. I have had a sudden peri meno weight gain and I'm currently a very different shape to that which I've been most of my life. I get married in 6 weeks. It's a last minute thing and I'm dress shopping now and finding it very upsetting as I no longer know what suits me and I just feel massive and frumpy in everything. Even Spanx and the like don't help as much as I though (hoped) they might.

At 5ft 2in, I weighed 13st on my wedding day and im no oil painting. Everybody there on the day somehow managed to make me feel beautiful! I'm sure your loved ones and friends will do the same for you.

Congratulations on your baby and forthcoming wedding!
You're not going to lose a stone in 3:weeks but there's a lot you can do to make yourself happier about your appearance.
Does your dress fit? Accept that you're not going to be as slim as you hoped to be at this point. Your body has done an amazing thing and made a baby but not everyone pings back into shape.
Eat well - cut out alcohol, cut back on caffeine, drink lots of water and try and get enough sleep.
Hair and make up can go a really long way in looking well groomed and presented. You don't have to be thin to be beautiful.
I'm sure you will look lovely and I hope you have a special day.

@warofthemonstertrucks ahhh I feel your pain! I HATED wedding dress shopping and ended up settling on a dress in the end - don’t be like me! There will be one you live out there!

@MaMisled ah thank you! That’s great to know and @Beamur thank you for all the advice! I’ll try and stick to what I’m doing so I at least feel healthier even if I’m going to be a fat bride 🙄 took me 9 months to shift the baby weight last time so should’ve known I wouldn’t shift it this time around in just 5 months!

Brides almost always look their absolute best on their wedding day because they are lit up with happiness.
Every wedding we have attended the Bride has looked stunning. I will say that this doesn't always show in the formal photographs so make sure you get some natural ones and check out the pictures your friends take for your unguarded joyous moments.
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding and your beautiful baby! What a fabulous year!

Hi @CutiePatooties , I was in exactly the same boat after having my little boy 9 months before my wedding day! I felt exactly the same feeling as you leading up to the day as I didn't look how I really wanted, and bought a big dress to cover myself - this, among with the other challenges of parenting has lead me to a new career in health and fitness helping women find their confidence post pregnancy.
I just wanted to offer you some tips to help.
Try to take some time for yourself to sit with these feelings, journalling can really help.
Walk as much as you can everyday, preferably in nature - this will help to relax and reframe your thoughts.
Make small changes to your current diet - try whole foods, veggies, grains and fruit, drink lots of water - this will help your energy levels and can be a real mood booster!
You will have an amazing day, YOU are getting married to YOUR person, try to write down some positive points about your relationship and WHY you chose to get married...
It will bring your lovely family closer than ever! That's what I took away from my wedding day, we had our little 9month old with us and it made it more meaningful.
Take a deep breath, you are going to have an AMAZING wedding day! x

I have a wonderful friend who is very short and very plump.

If you stand back from it her dress was totally the wrong shape.

But you know what - she was one of the most beautiful brides I’ve ever seen because the happiness was dripping from every pore. She had her perfect country wedding and a decent bloke she had waited a long time for. I’ll never forget her face when I saw her coming down the aisle. She was so happy it just radiated out from her. And thats all everyone saw - a glowing bride.

I hope you have a wonderful day

@ODFOx ahhh thank you - your comment made me smile! There has been lots of great things happening this year and I should count myself lucky and be thrilled about it all!

@CMPT thank you so much for the tips! Really helpful.

@Ted27 yeah I think my dress is wrong for me but nothing looked right tbh! Thank you; I’ll try and focus on how glad I am to be marrying my best friend and hopefully I won’t feel like cr*p on my wedding day!

@CutiePatooties it's my pleasure! If there's anything else I can do to help then please do reach out!
Have an amazing wedding day, you deserve it! xx

I’m fat on my wedding day. Got flabby arms in the photos. But still its one of the happiest day in my life.

@Abcdefgh1234 ah, that’s exactly what I wanted to know! Like, will the day come and I’ll just be happy and not give a s**t?

thank you 😊 your comment has really helped me. I’m hoping I will like at least one photo though.

@CutiePatooties if you're feeling brave why don't you post a photo here of you in your dress? It might get you over the initial fear, and I'm sure you'll get a lot of positive comments 😊
I completely agree with PP that brides always look radiant on their wedding day! I'm sure you will look beautiful

Feeling a little brave! I hate the dress as well by the way but hated it a little less than the other 49 I tried on hahahhaha.

I don’t think it’s possible for a bride to look fat and ugly!!

@LittleMrsPerfect well I really hope you’re right! As on a normal day I’m both… but, maybe my mua and hair stylist can save me a little bit!

You do not look at all fat, I suspect as you have got it wrong about the fatness you almost certainly aren't ugly either.

@Galarunner oh thank you, that made me well up then… as really, yes, I am fat. Perhaps the dress is more flattering than I thought or maybe the photos are taken at good angles?

all of which, makes me feel a little better. It’s nice just having someone say I’m not fat! 😂

I did have a melt down over it earlier and told everyone I’m thinking of cancelling the whole thing. Really petty, I know… But just feel like I’m at my worst and wanted to marry at my best. Ah, well.

You look fine in your dress.

A stone and a half doesn't make you fat either.

I think generally women feel a bit shit about themselves after having babies. I felt dreadful about myself after mine. But I look back at pictures now and I looked great. Tiredness and hormones do a number on us.

I’m in the same boat. I had my dress from pre-pregnancy as covid forced us to delay. I’m getting married in 5 weeks and have just accepted that it needs to be let out. Luckily I still like the dress. I feel shit about myself and my lack of willpower though.

I’m much fatter than you btw

@Blondbombsite it feels crap doesn’t it?
how do you stop the panicking? I feel stressed about something I can’t change and that’s the issue. 3 weeks isn’t long enough to change it, so I’ve got to learn to chill out!

@CutiePatooties I am being 100% honest here. You definitely don't look fat or ugly in any way shape or form. You look fab in these photos so on your wedding day with hair, makeup etc all done you will look stunning.

It is hard though when you feel a certain way about yourself. Especially when hormones etc are all over the place after having a baby.

I don't think you need to take drastic measures for your big day but if you want to do something then just normal routine stuff like drinking water, sleep, walking or whatever exercise you like, cut out salt, alcohol, bread.

Wishing you a magical day

As it currently stands (it’s a strapless dress with a jacket overlay)

I’m not panicking as I’m more focused on everyone else having a good time atm. I am quite depressed about it though and don’t want to spend the morning feeling shit. I’ve always had problems with my weight but liked my basic shape, I feel that has totally changed since the baby even though I didn’t put on much weight (I comforter ate after though when we had a shitty 6 months).