Didn't lose the weight, now it's too late!

[noonetoblamebutmyselfandpizza]

There will probably be someone on here who will spot it's me! But I just need to say it all here in the hope that someone can make me feel a tiny bit better, after all I have no one else to blame but myself!

My wedding was meant to be last July. We've rebooked for August.
I bought my wedding dress last February. I loved it, but I lost about 6 kilos ish to get into it.

Then lockdown, stopped dieting, two young toddlers to look after, couldn't exercise because of hip pain ...I could go on! But ultimately, regardless of those things I've mentioned above I just ate.too.much.food! And for some reason I just couldn't get the motivation to get the weight off. Still can't.

I've since gained about 10kilos more than when I bought my dress so obviously it doesn't fit me. I've left it too late - due to my denial and "diet tomorrow" attitude and now I can only get a dress off the rack. Or I can get mine altered - going to see about that tomorrow.

I just feel so fucking stupid and disgusting! It's only now dawning on me how I've really let myself down :(

Can anyone make me feel better? I doubt it but it's worth a shot.

Go low carb, it will drop off you, you immediately start shrinking. Any chance you can start some exercise?

I lost a tonne of weight before my wedding, but it's actually a bit depressing having a wedding dress sitting in my cupboard that I can't even fit one leg into any more! I don't even really look like myself in the photos. I'm sure you'll look gorgeous, and I hope you have a great day x

Can I ask why you don't want a corset back or panels put back in??? Just curious, as this seems the logical thing to do, along with healthy eating.

Think positive and you can certainly do it. I'd go on a keto diet. you can till eat, aren't hungry, but do need to alter what you eat.

You have your plate full already with toddlers, covid, a wedding etc etc, so IMO, I'd have a corset back put in the dress. That way, the dress will be moulded and done up to your wedding shape, without putting yourself in even more stress to also crash diet or get to a specific size.

@Arbadacarba Thank you so much! I'll keep you all updated!

@Stonelovelace That does actually help! Haha
Something to look forward to!
Im glad you enjoyed your wedding day and that it didn't matter in the end because you had a great time. Do you still not like the dress you wore?

@Bluntness100 I actually did Keto the first time round when I bought the dress last Feb! I really enjoyed it but after 6 months I gave up and I think I just went mental with the carbs which is part of why I'm the size I am now!
I've tried keto since and the weight hasn't fallen off, I wonder if I've messed my metabolism up?

@ViceLikeBlip I kinda know what you mean. When I first bought the wedding dress I was 57kg at 5ft 2 but I looked gaunt and tired. I think I'm going to aim for 60kg if I can as I look and feel good at that weight.
I bet you felt great on your wedding on your wedding day?

@Eleoura I'm a bit scared I won't love the dress with those changes, we haven't discussed them fully yet so I'm not entirely sure what to expect.
I love the dress as it comes and I'd feel really proud of myself if I managed to get into it without those things being done.
I know, probably weird. I should just do as you say! But I'll make that decision in one month from now depending on how I've got on.

OP, just either get the panels put in or buy a bigger dress. You haven't let yourself or anyone down. I spent my 20s starving myself to get into smaller clothes. I wasted so much money on clothes I was going to diet into. And so much time trying to starve myself into them. Finally in my 30s I accepted I am fat and started buying clothes that fit me. Now I'm 40 and the happiest I've ever been. Because I'm not permanently starving.

@Pikachusbutt Love your username haha.
You're probably right....But I've got to give it a shot, and if it doesn't work so be it I will have to get those adjustments made.

I'm glad you're happier now and living life the way you want to. The not starving all the time is definitely a bonus!

I'm in the exact same position OP, bought dress 2 years ago, postponed from last year to end of this month and dress didn't fit when I picked it up in May. I've been hammering the gym and (mostly) eating sensibly but the weight isn't shifting. Because of the back on mine, alternations will be tricky.

I've bought an off the rack dress as a back up, and hoping that all my work over the last couple of months will pay off. I've got my first fitting on Wednesday, so that's decision time. Im dreading it tbh 🙈

@whatthehelldowecare Hello!
Gosh, it's a stressful situation to be in isn't it?
Does the seamstress have your dress?
I chose to keep mine with me so I can try it on before I go to see her!

I'll be thinking of you on Wednesday, it sounds like you've done your best snd you may have lose inches through toning etc.

Let me know how you get on?

I'm getting worried now,

I've gone from eating whatever I want / portion size etc to watching everything and exercising every single night at the gym.

And I've gained half a kilo?!

I'm 5ft 2, pear shape, eating between 1200-1400cal a day. Going to the gym and burning 600+ cal a day.

Don't understand?

Buy that book I posted. It’ll FALL off you. You can lose 20lbs in 2 weeks. (I did.) And it’s all fresh, natural, healthy, unprocessed food.

Breakfast every day: grapefruit, toast.

Lunch varies each day but is 2 eggs and salad, cheese on toast, fresh fruit, fish and salad, etc.

Dinners are stuff like chicken and veg, beef burger and salad, lamb and ratatouille, fish and veg, etc. You eat like a supermodel. Plus it retrains you into what a meal can look like - salad and fish can be a meal.

So had my fitting today at IT FITS!! I am absolutely godsmacked but absolutely delighted! The seamstress is going to let it out a little around my hips just so it is abit comfier, but the back (where it was tight) doesn't need touched at all!

I'm still a stone and a half heavier than I was when I bought the dress, but must have lost inches through the healthy eating and gym.

It is still pretty snug, but another 3 weeks of hammering it and I'm hoping it'll be great!

@whatthehelldowecare Yes!! Well done! I'm really happy for you that's such great news! :)
You must be feeling so amazing right now!

Keep it up, that really made me smile as I was thinking of you today.

Congrats x

@ThatOtherPoster sounds doable :) I'll check it out!

@noonetoblamebutmyselfandpizza thank you! I was honestly speechless. I tried it on last night with my mother in law and it still seemed miles off fitting, so I'd resigned myself to wearing the back up dress. Took it with me on the off chance the seamstress could work a miracle.. turns out my mother in law was fastening it wrong and it fits!

Stick at it OP, you'll get into yours too!!

How are all the other wedding plans going?xx

@whatthehelldowecare You could so turn that into a 'hate the MIL thread' 😂 what a relief and the build up! Did you cry? I will if mine fits!

Just watched my future husband demolish a pizza and beers, when he doesn't fit into his shit and has just ordered the exact same one in the size he needs now...no stress! So jealous.

We need to get planning tbh! But I've been going to the gym every night and when I get back I am exhausted. I think I need to go every other day or something ...

Is yours all done?

Hahahaha what a typo!

SUIT!!!

SUIT!

@noonetoblamebutmyselfandpizza

Hahaha, I definitely could! She came to the fitting with me and was absolutely mortified when the seamstress just effortlessly buttoned it up when she'd been basically panting trying to get it fastened last night 😂 we had a right good laugh about it on the way home!

I feel like we're living the same life at the moment! My OH is wearing a kilt, and he done the exact same... went for his fitting two weeks ago, got the next size up and is entirely unbothered by it all, if only it was as easy for us!

I'm the same, trying to get ahead in work so I can get finished up without stressing, keep at the gym, finalise plans, eat well and keep the house remotely tidy and it feel impossible to do all of those things well at the same time.. but I'll get there!

We're in Scotland so still won't be allowed dancing etc indoors come the end of July, so we cancelled our band today and now on the hunt for new entertainment, but other than that, I think we're all sorted! x

You are not disgusting, it's bloody hard. I am an extreme person and went for surgery which worked well. But don't forget there are things like orliatat which can drop a few kg quickly and also nettle tea is a massive tummy flattener. Please enjoy your wedding and don't hate yourself x

Hi all.

I have failed. I tried my best but only lost 2 kilos. That's with 1200-1400cal a day and gym every evening, totally different to what I was doing before (nothing and eating 2000 cal or more and eating crap)

So disheartened. I've got about 12 days until I have to go back to the seamstress and tell her I failed. I haven't lost any inches either and today I just had a big binge because I feel so crap about myself.

It's so hard. I am a similar height to you. To lose weight over the past few months I have been down to 1000-1200 calories per day with exercise on top (never eating any calories 'earned' though). If I eat over 1200 I maintain or gain.

What types of things are you actually eating?

@Elmo311 Are you the OP with a name-change?

2 kilos is a decent loss - don't think of it as a failure. As I said upthread, you will look wonderful on the day no matter what your weight, because you'll be happy and radiant, and groomed to be your very best.

Your weight will not be what you remember about the day, nor what you see when in years to come you look back at your pictures. Your photographer will make sure all your pictures show you looking at your absolute best and, if you're anything like me, you'll look back in 15 years' time and marvel at how young and beautiful you were on your wedding day.

I strongly recommend one of these.

www.johnlewis.com/miraclesuit-waist-cincher/black/p2233249

Hi all,

I just thought I'd come and update the thread as I'm getting married next week!!

I didn't lose much weight at all, not for lack of trying. I wonder if now because I'm mid 30's it's much harder? Previously I just used to say "I'm doing it now" and the weight would come off.

Anyway, I went to my fitting yesterday and I burst into tears because I just knew the dress wasn't going to fit (again) and I felt so humiliated and embarrassed and a failure.

The seamstress didn't tell me that after my previous visit, and leaving the dress there that she was doing all the alterations. So when I put the dress on she zipped it right up!
She had let out the panels either side of the dress, and now it fits just fine. My arms look awful but there's not much I can do about it now.

I'm glad I didn't have to have the corset back, but I wish she would've mentioned that it was all going to be alright!

Thanks for everyone's nice kind comments, they meant a lot to me

I really need to work on not just thinking that I'm worth nothing when I'm overweight, I hate that I feel like that about myself.

I'm so glad it all worked out - I hope you have a wonderful wedding!

So happy for you that it fits , the stress of it was probably making you eat. Have a wonderful day and you will look amazing x