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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Devastated rehomed dogs yesterday

62 replies

Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 12:19

As title says I am devastated. I rehomed my 2 dogs to blue cross yesterday, I can barely breathe and cant stop crying, I have had them since they were puppies and they are ages 6 and 7.

I signed them over and asked if blue cross could just send a message they are ok and if rehomed lady said no. I said I dont want details of family just that they are ok.

My circumstances have changed drastically. When I got my dogs I had a very different life, my daughter was late teens and they were like children to me. Life has changed I am ill now and became unable to walk them, financial circumstances changed also, lost home then moved to a council flat with a lot of stairs in which I can barely go up and down due to pain. The council due to my illness found a new ground floor property for me, and no pets allowed. So my dogs are now with Blue Cross and I can barely cope today. They must be so confused.

Really what Im saying is has anyone gone through this before? How did you cope?

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Fudgecakes · 08/02/2020 12:26

Oh, bless you....my heart goes out to you. What an incredibly hard thing to have to do. I have no advice as I've never had to do this....but Blue Cross lady seems mean not to keep you informed ☹. Sending you big hugs and a handhold. Am sure your dogs will be found loving new homes and be well taken care of 💐

GeraltOfRivia · 08/02/2020 12:28

I am so sorry. How heartbreaking for you. I have no words but I hope you make it through today.

Sussexmidwife · 08/02/2020 12:31

I cannot imagine how hard this is for you. I think you have shown yourself to be a truly loving owner to make this decision in your odds best interests.
We adopted our girl from a charity almost 5 years ago and I asked them if they could please let the original owners know that she was safe and would be well loved by us. All they could/would tell us was that the owner’s health issues meant she had to be rehomed. As in your case, their policy was not to pass any messages or share any info. I often think of the previous owners and hope that they somehow know that their precious girl settled very well with us after some initial issues, is hugely loved and spoiled.
Your dogs lives had already changed as your circumstances did. People who go to charities for a dog/dogs are well vetted and will recognise that your dogs will need time to adjust. The home they will go to will give them a life much closer to what you were able to give them previously. They will recognise that happiness and enjoy it again.
You have done the right thing. Let that knowledge bring you strength at this really tough time xx

Didactylos · 08/02/2020 12:34

So sorry Annieberrie, for you and the dogs
Youve done the bravest and hardest thing for an owner. Of course you love and miss them but you are also being responsible and selfless enough to know that they need a different home, both for your and their welfare, and have used an organisation that will take their future care and home seriously
totally unmumsnetty hugs

Chocolatedeficitdisorder · 08/02/2020 12:37

My current two and previous two came from reputable rescues. Your dogs absolutely will be OK. They have rescue back up for life.

My current boy has been with us for eight years, and my girl for five. They are with us forever.

Smilethoyourheartisbreaking · 08/02/2020 12:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 12:45

All of you thank you for replying. I am just so sad and dont know what to do with myself, they were always beside me, it is the worst I keep thinking they are here.

They are such beautiful little dogs, blue cross said they would not be waiting long, I only hope they can stay together, especially the eldest I am do worried for her as she was so attached to me and I her. I feel so evil just abandoning them, they were so excited as we were leaving yesterday they thought they were going on a day out, and then I just left them.

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Handsnotwands · 08/02/2020 12:48

We’ve just rescued a 7 year old dog. We are totally in love with him. He’s going to have a brilliant life with us. There’s someone out there who will welcome your dogs into their lives and consider themselves very lucky to have found them. They’ll love them, keep them safe and give them everything they need. You’ve done a good thing, giving them and another family a chance to have a happy life together

failedatlife · 08/02/2020 12:49

Oh my god I can't even imagine your pain. Can you ask the council to reconsider the no pets? If you're on benefits you can access housing legal aid and you may be able to argue it's detrimental to your mental health not to have the dogs?

Wolfiefan · 08/02/2020 12:52

Oh you’re so the very opposite of evil. You’re putting their needs first. Flowers

Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 12:55

No not on benefits, I work and its ironic that recently I can work at home due to illness, working at home was my aim so I would be at home more; now I work at home and illness forces me to be unable to walk very far

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Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 12:57

I do feel evil, poor wee things must be scared

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Frequency · 08/02/2020 12:57

The Blue Cross said no because it is less traumatic in the long term to both dogs and owners to make a clean break.They are one of the better, possibly even the best, rescues. Your dogs will be fine. They'll find a loving home able to give them what they need. Although it's sad to hear, dogs are very adaptable. I've rescued and fostered dozens over the years and not one of them failed to adapt and be happy after time, even the most difficult one found a loving home and bonded with his new friend.

That being said I wonder if it might be a plan to talk to Cinnamon Trust and the council. If the council are lenient Cinnamon Trust may have people who will walk your dogs. It's a long shot and you might decide the process is too traumatising if there is a possibility it might not work out but it's worth considering.

In the meantime be kind yourself. You made the ultimate selfless choice to give your dogs the best possible life. You are the kind of owner all dogs deserve.

BadEyeBri · 08/02/2020 13:04

awh I am so sorry for you. Your wee dogs will find a new home and will settle with time. One of my rescues came to me for similar reasons. Her owner got very ill and had to move and could no longer keep her. She has been with us for 2 years and lives in the lap of luxury. We rescued her through a foster home system so I do still have some contact with her previous owner and send photos.
You did a very brave thing and, although it will always hurt, as time goes by the hurt will be a little less sharp. I'll be thinking of you today OP

Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 13:06

Thank you frequency that helps re Blue Cross, i had a fit when on the form euthanasia was on it, the lady did say this is nothing to worry about, only for seriously ill and aggressive dogs. Spent last night on google terrifying myself.

Frequency I tried every avenue to keep my girls and as I also work for the council (not housing) I knew it was a no go, the property is strictly no dogs/cats. Its ridiculous to me what harm could they do.

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Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 13:10

Thank you all it helps to hear that some of you have rescued dogs and they are ok, i hope they forget about me, ill never forget them. I just want to jump into car and take them back, and I know I cant, I signed them over and then I would lose my home/be unable to hide them.

So lost without my shadows.

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peoplepleaser1 · 08/02/2020 14:50

I'm so so sorry to hear this OP. Please know that your dogs will be ok, the Blue Cross will make sure of it.

I work with dogs, including many who are very attached to their owners. It's true that they will be able to form a secure attachment in a new home.

I know that is hard to hear, as they are your babies but they will be ok and find happiness.

The stance of the blue cross re communication is really tough on the original owners. It does keep things more simple for them and for the new owners and in some ways makes sense- but not to the original owner who just wants some reassurance.

ProfessorHasturLaVista · 08/02/2020 14:55

They probably want their reputation as good rehomers to be the reassurance - they will do their utmost to find a suitable, loving home.
I know that doesn’t make you feel any better right now though Flowers

Getoffmylilo · 08/02/2020 14:58

The Blue Cross are really good at caring for the animals while waiting for new homes and the rehoming process itself. They, like a lot of other animal shelters, have one rule for everyone when it comes to communication after you've taken your pets in and they stick to it rigidly. I'm sure your dogs will stay together too, it's unusual for pairs of either dogs or cats who go in together to be separated unless they actually don't get along. I'm so so sorry you had to do this, it's a heart-breaking and very brave thing to do. Big hug x

FLOrenze · 08/02/2020 15:10

If I could come at this from the other side, I hope it will give you some reassurance. I totally understand why you want to know that the dogs are happy. My dog came from a rescue where the owner had died. She is so loved by all of my family and she has brought me so much joy. The rescue have a facility for posting updates and also put our photo on their site with her.

By pure co-incidence the mother of the owner saw a post I made about the dog on another site and contacted me. We exchanged texts and she was able to reassure the children that the dog is in a loving home.

Like your dogs, she came from a wonderful home and I know that made it easier for us. Naturally she took a little while to trust us, but treating her gently and taking advice from the rescue was all she needed.

Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 17:59

Again thank you, its reassuring they may not be separated and blue cross will do their best. I pray they get a loving home, theyve only ever known love.

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Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 18:04

Florence thats brilliant really helpful

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Original poster
Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 19:47

Bless all of you who have lost your dogs, it must be a million times worse x

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SaskiaRembrandt · 09/02/2020 09:41

Oh, OP, my heart goes out to you. You are most definitely not evil, just in an awful, insurmountable predicament. I can imagine how painful it must be at the moment and you'll probably always miss them, but the pain will ease.

I do think it's cruel to leave a previous owner in the dark about the fate of a much loved pet. A simple message saying they have found a new home would be a small kindness.

SaskiaRembrandt · 09/02/2020 09:43

And FWIW, my cat was a rescue, I hope her previous family know how happy and loved she is with us. I'm very grateful to them for putting her needs first and not only because it means she is now part of my family.