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The doghouse

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Original poster

Devastated rehomed dogs yesterday

62 replies

Annieberrie · 08/02/2020 12:19

As title says I am devastated. I rehomed my 2 dogs to blue cross yesterday, I can barely breathe and cant stop crying, I have had them since they were puppies and they are ages 6 and 7.

I signed them over and asked if blue cross could just send a message they are ok and if rehomed lady said no. I said I dont want details of family just that they are ok.

My circumstances have changed drastically. When I got my dogs I had a very different life, my daughter was late teens and they were like children to me. Life has changed I am ill now and became unable to walk them, financial circumstances changed also, lost home then moved to a council flat with a lot of stairs in which I can barely go up and down due to pain. The council due to my illness found a new ground floor property for me, and no pets allowed. So my dogs are now with Blue Cross and I can barely cope today. They must be so confused.

Really what Im saying is has anyone gone through this before? How did you cope?

OP posts:

Original poster

Annieberrie · 09/02/2020 14:20

Id give anything just to know they are ok, I am keeping so busy as all I want to do is get in the car and bring them home, but I cant

OP posts:

Apple1971 · 09/02/2020 14:38

I had to give up my two little dogs three years ago. They were 9 and 11 and if had them from puppies and they were my little soul mates.

I’d just separated from my ex after he had an affair and moved out. I took the dogs with me I was living in a rented flat (which was fine with the landlord but I’d had to find one that was more pricey because of the dogs). They had been used to a county life with a big garden they could access and now were in my flat all day while I was at work. I spent £400 a month on a dog walker (I’m in London) which meant after my rent and bills I literally had almost nothing left to live on. It wasn’t viable and they were unhappy - one started weeing on the floor just as I was leaving for work and they were becoming distressed being shut in for 12 hours a day.

I found a wonderful local charity that rehomes via foster families but like you I wasn’t able to know where they had gone when they were rehomed, but I know they stayed together. I wrote long letters about each and all the things they like and don’t like and I hope that their new owners have them a happy home.

I cried for a week when I took them and even now I can’t look at photos of them without feeling sad but it was the right thing to do. It was a very turbulent time in my life - I’d just left my home and marriage and a month after I gave the dogs up my dad was diagnosed with cancer so I spent the next year travelling up at weekends to see him before he died - so I don’t know what I would have done if I’d still had the dogs to factor in too.

I know the charity I used has a ‘return ‘ policy for adopters in case their circumstances change and I often look on the website every few months just imagining I might see one of them there and be able to have the back. Silly I know but also not seeing them is reassuring and I know they must be settled in their home..

You have done the right and responsible thing and like all hard decisions only time will help. They will settle and I know from friends who have rescued pets that they will have a kind and wonderful home. It’s actually hard to adopt a dog - hoops to jump through etch- so the person will be committed and look after them.

I hope you are ok. Be kind to yourself.

Original poster

Annieberrie · 09/02/2020 16:02

Thanks so much for your post Apple I really appreciate it x

OP posts:

Wolfiefan · 09/02/2020 16:32

I’m so sorry Apple and OP that you had to make that decision. Many years ago we adopted two young cats. They had been handed over to rescue after the break up of a marriage. I still wish I could let the people know that they were so very loved and both had lovely lives. We didn’t lose the older one until she was 19.
It must be so hard to give up pets that you love and so much want to keep. But you’ve done the right thing. For them.

Episcomama · 09/02/2020 16:33

OP, I think the test of what makes an owner a good one, is that you do the best thing for your pets. This is what you've done. You've put them first. And I'm so, so sorry that you are having such a difficult time at the moment.

Hoppinggreen · 09/02/2020 16:48

I do home inspections for a couple of dog charities and without exception the people wanting to adopt are absolutely lovely people who really put their pets first and offer a brilliant new home
I know you are in pain OP and you have been very brave to do what you have done. Your dogs will never forget you but they will be loved again by their new family I promise

Original poster

Annieberrie · 09/02/2020 17:23

Thank you, its the reason I went with Blue Cross as I was frightened of advertising on gumtree or facebook. Its just so final and horrible to hear that they cannot just leave a simple message that they are ok, I understand the reasoning but still..

OP posts:

Apple1971 · 09/02/2020 18:56

I adopted a cat last year - I now own my own home again and have a new partner but think it would be a while before I could imagine ever having a dog again. But to adopt our cat we had home visits, a trial a lots of support so I know charities do a great job of making sure they get the right people. It’s nice to have a little furry friend again - my little cat is very spoilt and loved x

Original poster

Annieberrie · 09/02/2020 19:38

Thats a nice ending Apple. I have had dogs all my life, and my 2 little dogs that I have had to give up I love so much, I dont think I will ever have a dog again, due to my circumstances it seems highly unlikely and a kind of betrayal to my little dogs, it would feel wrong

OP posts:

MimiLaRue · 09/02/2020 19:46

Big hugs OP ((((((annieberrie))))))
You are not evil in the slightest- you have been thrown into an impossible situation of which you had no control and you are now trying to do the best for the dogs. You acted out of love for them and not a single person can say you did wrong.
If you love someone, you want the best for them and thats exactly what you have done, despite the fact your heart is breaking.

I hope your health improves with time and that you find peace about this decision. Your dogs will be fine- they'll find someone who adores them and they'll have a happy rest of their lives.

Astrabees · 10/02/2020 12:02

Our new dog came from rescue, she is 10. Everything about her indicates she came from a good and loving home, she has lovely manners, knows tricks and is super cuddly. When I think about her old owner I don't think that they didn't care or didn't love her , I just think something really dreadful must have happened to them and understand they had to make new arrangements for her. You did the right and brave thing to have ours rehomed and the Dogs Trust have a great reputation, and will make sure they have happy lives.

RedHelenB · 10/02/2020 17:32

Just watch paul o'Grady Batterseas programme. Even the most depressed dogs are happily rehomed. And it looks as though yours will be very soon too.

Original poster

Annieberrie · 10/02/2020 22:32

Astrabees thats lovely, I worried that it would be thought they were unwanted and unloved, I even said this to Blue Cross as its just not the case

OP posts:

SecretWitch · 10/02/2020 22:37

Oh, Annieberrie, my heart goes out to you. What a painful decision for you 💐. I’m praying your sweet dogs go to the best home possible.

amazedmummy · 10/02/2020 22:49

I can't imagine how hard this must be for you but sadly we don't have a crystal ball. When you got your lovely wee dogs you had absolutely no idea that this would happen. I have 2 cats, one was dumped on the street, she is timid, wary of men and took a long time to settle. The other came from a loving home that just couldn't care for her, she rules the roost, assumes that everyone loves her will grace us with her presence according to her own schedule. Their new owners will be able to tell they were loved, it will come across in their behaviour.

elastamum · 10/02/2020 22:58

I am so sorry for you. It must be heartbreaking. I have a dog that was rehomed from someone who could not keep him. I am lucky in that we are still in touch as the rehoming charity was run by a friend. He is so much loved by us and we are so very grateful to them for letting him go to us. I am sure that your dogs will find loving homes too.

twinnywinny14 · 10/02/2020 23:11

I’m in tears reading this as I can’t imagine life without my dogs and to know they are still out there somewhere must be the hardest thing ever. I’m really saddened that you cannot find out when they have been rehomed as it wouldn’t take much to do but would mean so much to you at this difficult time. Remember no matter what has happened now no one can ever take away the times and memories you have shared together and whether dogs have the memories like we do or not you will have shaped them in to the lovely dogs they are. I hope you find some comfort soon xx

JayAlfredPrufrock · 10/02/2020 23:17

I volunteer with a breed specific rescue.

Many dogs come in due to circumstances like yours.

They are all loved and cared for and suitable forever homes are found for them.

MasakaBuzz · 10/02/2020 23:29

I do think that is so sad. I rehomed a cat recently, and was given the previous owners number. I send her pictures and texts every month or so, letting her know he is well. She is really grateful.

Canklesforankles · 10/02/2020 23:47

They sound like really lovely well cared for dogs that will be easy to find a home for. If they even make it onto the website (some get reserved before that) it will show when they are reserved.
Sorry maybe it will be too painful to look.
My 2 dogs are 10 now and came to us when they were 5 due to previous owner’s ill health. I like to think they spent half their life happy there and then half with us being loved and happy too. They were a bit sad for a very short time (days) but soon settled with their new pack.
You had no choice and have done the responsible thing. I’m sorry it’s so hard

Honeyroar · 11/02/2020 17:07

I’m so sorry for you and Apple. It must be so heartbreaking but you both sound like you did the kindest thing for your dogs (and I despair of others that dump dogs for the slightest reason). For what it’s worth I’ve got two rescued dogs that didn’t have easy lives before coming to us (so in a much worse state psychologically than your dogs) and they both settled down and trusted us remarkably well- so hopefully yours will do so even faster. Best wishes to you both.

florriepeck · 11/02/2020 17:16

You've been very brave.
I think this must be harder than losing dogs when they pass away.
I feel terribly sorry for you.

MintySpud · 11/02/2020 17:19

Heartbroken for you.

RightestPersonOnMN · 11/02/2020 17:21

You did the responsible but it must’ve been heartbreaking for you. Much love to you

RightestPersonOnMN · 11/02/2020 17:21

Responsible thing

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