Very cute photo of lovely rescue puppy

[Rhinestone]

Fucking fed up with MNHQ deleting threads. They just deleted my thread 'Er...whatever happened to LadyEvenstar's thread?'

Re DBF and her possible ban, her FB page is Vallhala MN.

oops, xpost Kid.

UPDATE from the AIBU thread -

Justine MNHQ has confirmed that DBF has indeed been banned for personal attacks on that thread. Fucking outrageous. Anyone wanting to complain please come over to AIBU as MNHQ seem to be taking notice of that thread.

Of course they'll probably delete it soon....

Looking at the MN bod posts on the occupation thread - the big bad mean Doghouse is in the... um... Doghouse for not laying out the welcome mat when they all troop in here wanting to get rid of their fashion accessory labradors they bought for being "perfect family pets" who dare to poo and look at a child. So I'll be re-banned soon lawl. FFS I get sick of the expecting this place to be a rehoming service - no questions asked, no judgement made.

However since it appears I have no hope of working out wtf's gone on from when I was away - can someone send me the details in a blonde-proof PM before I get zapped? I'd go add to the occupation but they'll just pull my account no doubt.

They do have some really fucked up priorities though - hell they banned me at the time I needed support the most of all - and they've let fucking tonnes of anti-dog baiting, specifically designed to wind up the "baddies" of the doghouse - particularly DBF go on utterly utterly unchecked for months and months. You're allowed to say what the hell you like if you're playing the mummy card on here - but if you dare defend the animals, or the childless... out of the door.

Place is fucked up.

there is another HQ update
She basically got banned for her comment:

"You are a liar, foolish and a disgrace, not just for what you are doing to this dog but for trying to discredit someone who works her arse off to save them. You appall me..."

but also because she had been warned previously for being agressive. I actually feel sorry for DBF.

I didn't see the whole thread, but from what I did see, DBF was quite tame compared to what she could have been.

There is a thread to get the ban lifted

I'm wondering what changes they want to see in doghouse (as stated by Justine)

DBF was VERY restrained on 'that' thread. I cant say the same for others though who were horrendous bullies toward the children and personal hygiene.

Its just awful. I have DBF email and fb page and will pass it onto anyone who would like it via PM.

Well, dbf, if you are reading this - you have singlehandedly got me to break my vow never, ever to visit AIBU or post on a single thread there

Just to let you know, she is receiving messages that people have PM'd her here, but she cannot get them. So contact her through FB instead if you wish.

jax - can you pm me dbf's email and fb? i am leaving. ive posted all i can on the aibu thread but reading justine's personal attacks on top of the inconsistent monitoring of this site means i am going. will keep checking my pms until i go to bed so please send info as soon as you see this. thanks

I was very surprised they banned her. I didn't see anything on that thread that warranted it. I also normally ignore AIBU & can't keep up with that thread. I wish they would hurry up and reinstate her already.

I read about two pages of that thread and I was ready to explode. I logged off because I would have told that individual exactly what I thought of them.

I can't believe DBF was banned for saying what she did. In the circumstances, and given that she was actually having to defend herself from accusations of dishonesty, I think she was calm and measured in her response.

This is all so awful. I have such respect for DBF and valued her advice. I've learned so much from the Doghouse and it has offered so much support to me and others.

I read all the thread and tried to post but it had obviously gone over 1000 so I'll post it here instead:

'The Doghouse has become a scary place and we are here to make parents' lives easier, not scare them shitless.'

IMO the Feminism section is the most unpleasant place on Mumsnet. And that's not even factoring in the so called trolls.

I've read The Doghouse for quite a while, but before I got a dog I didn't post. Now I have a dog I have been posting and asking lots of questions, and have found much help from DBF and many others in The Doghouse. And I have learnt an amazing amount. I wouldn't even begin to compare the vileness I found in the feminism sections with the help and friendliness I've found in The Doghouse. I've seen the most disgusting people posting there and threads that have gone on for pages and pages which pretty much contain ONLY personal attacks.

Justine, I do hope that you can find a way to allow DBF back onto Mumsnet, and also clear out all the vipers in Feminism - which is the one place which EVERY woman (and man tbh) on Mumsnet should feel safe to post. Y'know, the place where woman are supported being as it's feminism and all.

The doghouse is only "vile" to those who want to use it as a rehoming service (oh shit MN you banned one of the chief rescuers didn't you - oopsy) for dogs for ridiculous reasons with no questions asked or judgement made. FFS you've only got to look at that previous thread where heaven and earth was moved to save a dog to see just how it DOES band together when the chips are down... but unconditional doggy-disposal? Fuck that shit cos there's no way it ever SHOULD be acceptable to treat dogs like they're disposable commodities.

Can't see me sticking around either - let's face it - there are hundreds of pregnancy forums out there - the doghouse was the only really decent place because of the humour and the regular posters... and the growing greyhound infestation (but again - I can find other houndy places).

And this site has NEVER supported women as an entireity. You've only got to look at the attitudes to the childless and the infertile - look at the delightful stuff judging women's professional ability in certain fields as inferior because they haven't reproduced, look at how they all kick off when their child's teacher dares to get pregnant and request similar part-time working to what they trumpet for the rest of mothers... this site only supports "women" when it suits them to. I miss the days of the old places like Handbag (before they turned the forums into shit) where ALL women and not just those it suited them to back had an equal voice.

'The Doghouse has become a scary place and we are here to make parents' lives easier, not scare them shitless.'

If the Doghouse scares you, don't visit - you're an adult and you don't have a gun to your head!

There are other forums specifically for dog owners, visit them. One I frequent is devoted to rescue dogs - it can also be scary, but only if you act like a numpty and show you're more interested in having a fashion accessory than a best friend.

Bring back DBF, she's only been banned because she's says out loud what the rest of us are thinking.

"make parents lives easier" -when they want to get rid of dogs for ridiculous reasons or get a completely unsuitable dog that we can all see as the forthcoming disaster it invariably is.

What the fluffy injured bunch want - is a doggy disposal service, no questions asked, behavioural improvements at the wave of a wand with none of that inconvenient "effort" required, no questions, no judgement, no walking on crap cold winter days required... stuff like "my dog has separation anxiety - well you need to do these things to work on it - nah I don't have time for that, I'll just crate him for 10 hours a day and when the neighbours complain about the barking - well you lot will find me a rescue place for him to go won't you."

Funnily the people who care about animals (and it's more than DBF) don't seem to want to oblige on that one.

oh man this is bad. read the thread also and was livid.
hope dbf is ok, how shit for someone who gives so much to everybody on here that asks for help no matter what idiots they are.

This is such a shame - The Doghouse and the regular posters does a valuable service in pointing out the realities of dog ownership to parents/families. The idea of having a dog and the reality of what having a dog entails are often so far apart from each other, and lots of people who haven't owned a dog before unfortunately haven't thought through the whole responsibility of it and what they will do if thing don't go optimally.

What I hear most loudly from DBF is her advocating firstly that people think through very carefully before they get a dog, and secondly that they take full responsibility when things go wrong. Really wise and kind words coming from a good place and from hard and painful experience of dealing with fallout.

Where it all goes pearshaped in the larger analysis is that there are some people (most of those in the Doghouse) hold firm that a dog, like a child, is not a disposable item and needs to be considered and made provision for for life, and there are others who just cannot abide this comparison and cannot give dogs this importance in their mind-frame, and so resent being prompted to feel guilty about the treatment of an animal. I'm not sure how this divide is bridged without there being some hard feeling on both sides, but I definitely don't think it should be solved with the banning of a strident but ultimately extremely caring and hard-working voice on one side.

We know you've got a grudge - you've got what you wanted so how about you let it drop now.

And yes, there are idiots on here who want to use this place as a dog disposal service for the most ridiculous reasons and it's sickening.

I've been mostly a lurker on Mn , and sadly has become less of a lurker over the past year or so, as the site and posters seem to have changed .

The only places I haven't stopped looking at daily include the doghouse. DBF has helped me with advice a couple of times off board, and along with others on here, have offered great advice, in all manner of doggy subjects.

I did read the original thread that started this, and was shocked that the op had the audacity to post whats she did, asking for help and advice and as usual totally ignored said advice. ( I have seen it on other subjects too).

I hide AIBU but have seen what has happened since.

It's sad that people 'help' people with advice and this is the way they are treated, Ok DBF does get passionate about this subject, but I thought MN was about parents helping and advising other parents.

Sadly this doesn't seem to be the case now,, it has got increasingly more aggressive and shouty.

I will miss the doghouse, and the other 3-4 subjects threads I haven't hidden but I'm off .