Swagger Inn Thread 135 - Series 3 is dodging through the schedules and nearing a climax. And frankly so are Team A after ep 8's bondage. So, put your bins out & get your perve on ready for ep 9

[FancyFancy]

Welcome regulars and noobs alike as we await the final two eps.

Filth and wild plot speculation is positively encouraged so let those imaginations run riot. Just remenber not to get so carried away that you forget to shere your thoughts here

Erm, not entirely what I mean helen

Good luck sorting out your laptop

Everything but your legs Fancy - what if you had an unexpected visit from an HBF?! Get your priorities straight.

Well obviously helen . And nothing will be crossed tomorrow - it's Thursday.

Well
I've taken the laundry bull by the horns and am washing my sofa covers for the first time
Eeeep
Having my hair done later
DC seem happy on their iPads which makes me feel guilty
How are the wenches today?

Sofa cushions?!...good god! I'm planning on leaving mine until the kids stop massaging yoghurt into them - and then I think it'll be easier and more pleasant all round to just take a flame thrower to it and head to the DFS Spring/summer/Autumn/winter sale!

I have got a list (my fat fingers always type that as lust) of jobs as long as my arm to do today, but fortunately I have been able to farm Airy Fairy and Little Shit out on an unsuspecting friend for a couple of the next five hours.

Might get a rewatch in later, depends how much eye rolling happens.

Morning everyone. badders I'm good thanks how are you? I'm currently enduring an episode of twirliwoos atm

Would anyone be so kind to explain what FAF ARF HRF etc are? I'm very confuddled at the moment

Thanks for your reassuring stories of your 2 year olds tomfoolery. Many a time I've done the rugby ball carry with tuts and the looks from people. I'm not brave enough to say anything back though! Jacob I hope you don't think I'm nosey but does your son have SN? Just my 3 yo is awaiting diagnosis for ASD and I hear that line all too often with people who meet him. Either than or he's ignorant for not replying, even though he doesn't understand and can't speak!

I had a couple of dreams last night as well. One with poldark one with athos! Poldark was strimming my garden and the one with athos I barely remember but we were at my grans house and we were in a couple and I remember him saying "I don't care what she says it's you I want not her" . Is it strange to feel disloyal to my dog?

Also would like to weigh in about Sylvie. I thought she was ok at first as a love interest but think she's a bit too meek for athos. The villains in series 3 were the best yet but compared to to rochefort well anyone is good

We got new sofas back in Feb...ikea ones with removeable and washable covers.
The footstool ones are on the line as we speak :)
We had leather for a good few years which is great with kids but not comfy and they faded quite badly.
I'm on fire this morning wenches!
Breakfast dishes done
Oven on self clean
Heated towel rail cleaned
3 lots of washing done and on line
💥 Boom!
Of course now I feel like a lie down 😃 with athos

Ah, yes.
2 year olds.

I always feel very sorry for parents of tantrumming kids and never judge so dont worry too much - people are prob looking and thinking "thank god mine are older now!" :)
I'm having my hair done later - DC at mums - which means I have to go and see her - which rally what I want to do. Grr.
Oh! I got a phone call last night from the hospital....I'm going to be contacted re the birth debrief! Got to say I'm very pleasantly surprised it's happening so quickly.
Elky...good luck with the jobs list!

Mine did the lying down screaming thing in Boots yesterday. Tucked her under my arm and carted her out. What with that and her biting her sister, it was a fun day all round

Wench lexicon for crumpet

Arf - a bit like lol
HBF - hot Beardy fucker
FAF - fit as fuck. Can be used as an adjective, verb or noun...it's very versatile
Nlt - not like that
Ylt - yes like that
RTFT - read the fucking thread
KHITFWF - Kill him/her in the face with fire , for those moments when sending in Vinny or lobbing a flaming pig just doesn't suffice

HTH

OMC = Oh My Cunt

Thank you elk for that

I know other people go through tantrums but always feels so much worse when it's you and people are staring! I really never try to judge parents because you never know what it's like until you've been through it. Unfortunately people seem really judgey round here, someone knocked at my sister's door the other day to say she didn't like the way her son was behaving.

Good news about the hospital badders usually hospitals are in no rush for anything!

I've never washed my sofa covers in my life. Tbf though ds has picked at the leather and eaten it so in desperate need for a new one! Would you recommend the ikea one?

I am most jealous of your Athos dream Crumpet....In over two years of unhealthy perving I've only ever had the one dream. Admittedly it was a corker, but still....

I only dreamt that Tom was my mum's boyfriend

Yes! I love them!
It's the Ektorp.
Very comfy and lots of different colour covers - apparently you can dye them too!
We have 2 X 2 strs and a storage footstool

Sorry Wicked but I've just PMSL at that

Wicked!
How very Freudian! 😀

I have Ektorp as well Bads

Sparks

Oh tell me about your dream elk

Thanks badders do you think theyd withstand two very very messy and destructive todddlers?

wicked bet you were gutted

Crumpet...I think so. You might need to wash them more often than I do but I know people with babies and pets who swear by them and they are so cheap!!
Wicked...as ever we are as one ❤️
Just got off phone with hospital...going to see them on 19th 😖

(And I use baby wipes to clean mine in between washes)

(Although to be fair I use wet wipes to clean most things slattern)

Yeah, I mean WTF

This is my sofa

Ooooh I love that and you
This is mine

God I love it when the kids are playing on the ps4
Just heard from ds2 (7) from the other room;
"Did you Jedi scum!!"
🙄😀

"Die" even!
Gah