Please help dress a frump I for a wedding with a colourful cocktail dress code 🙏

[Connachtfive]

Hello you lovely stylish people.
Im the frumpy aunt. I want to be the stylish aunt. Please help. I’m 60. 5ft 4inches. In reasonable shape. I’ve no idea where to start with the colourful cocktail dress code. The wedding is in London in August. Budget up to £300. I’ve been procrastinating so any ideas, styles and tips very gratefully received.

I don't believe in age "rules" either - but I also think it's disingenuous to believe that we still suit what we wore at 28 when we're 58, or whatever.

As for the Alemais dress, we'll have to disagree on what's cool, then ...!!!

I’m a 12. A 5ft 4 inch size 12. I love your posts. You’re super insightful and observant. Are you a personal stylist in real life? ❤️.

It’s all day!

Thanks! No, I'm not - but I clearly wish I was in another life, from my meddling on S&B clothing posts!!

I did go to art college though, & am a designer - of gardens! But I have lots of friends & clients in the art & design world - including interior design, jewellery, & fashion (in fact one of my clients used to head up a major European fashion house ... he's now retired but his gossip is excellent!).

Are you still feeling a bit overwhelmed/bewildered, or is there anything else that's been posted that has caught your eye?

What about a co ord set like this?

https://www.marksandspencer.com/tailored-drawstring-wide-leg-trousers/p/clp23078609?intid=mobile_app_pdp_share

That is absolutely gorgeous, OP, and definitely not frumpy. You could always team it with shoes/accessories in a brighter colour to match the theme.

IMO that makes even the slender model look like a loo roll holder. It doesn't even hang nicely.

That’s lovely.

Black tie though - not cocktail? It's much too much IMO.

It may not be for OP but It’s a beautiful dress.

How about this? It’s a colourful cocktail dress from an expensive, quality brand but an absolute bargain. Would have thought sizing was flexible. Shouldn’t swamp, simple shape, comfy, shows leg, covers arms…www.vinted.co.uk/items/7891016592-ashish-rainbow-sequin-dress-size-m-never-worn

https://www.ralphlauren.co.uk/en/cape-georgette-cocktail-dress-100067559.html?dwvar_100067559_womens_lauren_apparel_primarysize=10&dwvar_100067559_colorname=Cruise%20Royal

https://www.ralphlauren.co.uk/en/cape-georgette-cocktail-dress-3616856983908.html?gclsrc=aw.ds&&utm_subchannel=shopping&utm_source=google&utm_medium=paidshopping&utm_campaign=sale&utm_term=pmax&utm_content=crid_campaign22669749518_adgroup_tid_pid3616856983908&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22669781195&gbraid=0AAAAADnESOwOORZXzJ1ro8lxsS8VEVT5_&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V2F0LajuV2yVr1aacy9Jz0qK5QXPCkvPyfybYyEXUcusqUvCKULwthoCni4QAvD_BwE

https://www.ralphlauren.co.uk/en/lace-trim-charmeuse-cocktail-dress-100081256.html#pmin=200&pmax=500&start=1

https://www.johnlewis.com/adrianna-papell-floral-sheath-mini-dress-navy-multi/p114735646

https://www.karenmillen.com/product/karen-millen-twill-prom-woven-midi-dress_bkk23137?colour=navy

https://www.karenmillen.com/product/karen-millen-modal-drop-waist-midi-dress_bkk29366?colour=cobalt

https://www.harveynichols.com/rixo/dahlia-floral-print-silk-midi-dress-71270-mult-cara-mix-blue-248051/

https://www.thereformation.com/products/anaiis-silk-dress/1314547TAV.html?&dwvar_1314547TAV_color=BVD&quantity=1

https://www.mytheresa.com/gb/en/women/leo-lin-yvonne-floral-satin-minidress-blue-p01059735?dplink=true&utm_source=sea_pla&utm_medium=google&utm_campaign=google_sea&chn=sea_shopping&src=google&cmp=23742446068&tarea=gb&tar=&ag=&ptyp=&feed_num=P01059735-6&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6VwqS7JAdt7RM0-VGCxOljnyS6Tdz7VoAyGkOOwcIHnm6-JQHT42cGRoCZ8YQAvD_BwE&gbraid=0AAAAAD3Pw-ltSEh_qxW9uYAC7TZBWmE7y&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=23737829945&gbraid=0AAAAAD3Pw-ltSEh_qxW9uYAC7TZBWmE7y&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6VwqS7JAdt7RM0-VGCxOljnyS6Tdz7VoAyGkOOwcIHnm6-JQHT42cGRoCZ8YQAvD_BwE&slink_id=bb2d0d02-be99-4b41-a203-e7d66ccd599c

https://www.karenmillen.com/product/karen-millen-embroidered-detail-pintuck-waist-shirt-dress_bkk29097?colour=blue

https://www.karenmillen.com/product/coast-floral-placed-tulip-sleeve-mini-dress_bcc12165?colour=blue

https://www.allsaints.com/women/dresses/prue-draped-asymmetric-midi-dress/W123DE-10455.html

https://www.wolfandbadger.com/uk/bel-dress-midi-in-green/

https://www.wolfandbadger.com/uk/bareback-dress-in-green-taffeta/

https://www.wolfandbadger.com/uk/high-neck-sleeveless-dress-abstract-print-blue/

https://www.theoutnet.com/en-gb/shop/product/badgley-mischka/dresses/gowns/one-shoulder-cape-effect-crepe-gown/46376663163073731

https://www.theoutnet.com/en-gb/shop/product/rohe/dresses/maxi-dresses/draped-silk-twill-maxi-dress/46376663163037962

https://raishma.co.uk/products/kiara-navy-dress

Oh my goodness, @Choconuttolata what beautiful dresses!

The first one would be perfect, or the mytheresa shift

https://www.adolfodominguez.com/en-gb/satin-long-dress-with-side-drape-29304237110361.html?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=AD_UK_PMAX_GEN_MIX_AON_GADS&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20499599661&gbraid=0AAAAADlVNdJtH8HXB7By1vCsj25hV0BCd&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V0k5_eB71CGYiBYQMOxZPLFwUb2ushRw5qlWliJfBJ-oTh8LAC8rwhoCwlQQAvD_BwE

https://www.wolfandbadger.com/uk/midi-dress-with-a-silk-textured-boat-neckline-and-an-asymmetrical-hem-gold/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=22897495587&utm_content=&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22897497792&gbraid=0AAAAADrNWmyvirUGAkIzLbx4Wkq5NOrNu&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V-D8sLewK3QaL9jKEJ0ZBUPxWsmD6B4p_X6gGehxRee-BqELNc7kqhoChhkQAvD_BwE

https://www.johnlewis.com/florere-waist-panel-satin-midi-dress-ochre/p115255912?size=8&s_ppc=2dx_mixed_fashion_BAU&tmad=c&tmcampid=2&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20158969807&gbraid=0AAAAAD2el1wnso91PfOyvUzwkLHY_jT6D&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V4kxSRnvzsExZFyao38fghendRR9Y81nElB7ojMRFlWKm83krcsDkBoCpksQAvD_BwE

https://www.anthropologie.com/en-gb/shop/hybrid/by-anthropologie-casey-cape-overlay-satin-midi-dress?color=230&size=6&type=REGULAR&cm_mmc=rakuten--affiliates--Lyst+UK/EU-_-3725712651945548299139075&utm_medium=affiliates&utm_source=rakuten&utm_campaign=Lyst+UK/EU&utm_term=1924305&utm_content=3725712651945548299139075&utm_kxconfid=v3sdgzjs8&ranMID=37257&ranLoyalty=0&ranEAID=gcdL/ATRVoE&ranSiteID=gcdL_ATRVoE-GkNR5JPtRvtofzzyRPtZGQ&quantity=1

https://www.farfetch.com/uk/shopping/women/malina-draped-maxi-dress-item-32607042.aspx?lang=en-GB&size=20&pup_e=3337&pup_cid=206008&pup_id=32607042-20&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_keywordid=&utm_shoppingproductid=32607042-20&pid=google_search&af_channel=Search&c=22796887603&af_c_id=22796887603&af_siteid=&af_keywords=&af_adset_id=&af_ad_id=&af_sub1=&af_sub5=32607042-20&is_retargeting=true&shopping=yes&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22787364390&gbraid=0AAAAADsmKHRXLGC738I32obhWWffaEOpN&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V5zYOMLri3HJ1oZHRCwTN_VjNkURNBligS8fMirPFsYWm8kBIvdY4hoCx88QAvD_BwE&mm_rf=mm_4efda0e16997cd1bd3e3

https://bymalina.com/uk/p/cassia-maxi-dress-amber/

https://bymalina.com/uk/p/sabrina-maxi-dress/

https://www.reiss.com/style/sv045908/v69260?utm_content=search&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_search_type=nonbrand&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=11403244488&gbraid=0AAAAADy9EnqpHNjG93dIaMjJMUZGx4jEY&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V3bCvKP2bwqGis-OLoSm3g-U60qIO9d71Z_x4FyXnG5aFqpaMRv5HhoCWEgQAvD_BwE

https://www.marksandspencer.com/maxi-column-dress/p/clp60782703?color=TANGERINE&extid=ps_ps-pla-pmax_ggl_ww_ch__-UK-_-_jaeger&cq_src=google_ads&cq_cmp=21684719513&cq_con=&cq_term=&cq_med=pla&cq_plac=&cq_net=x&cq_plt=gp&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21678309561&gbraid=0AAAAAD7g6bTvi8X_prU_SgESvz_SR0XGp&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V2n2f11ktDuk8GjAxV1CrCBgy9zBHO2e_7zgkdXWcpd_XlgfILLf7hoC__EQAvD_BwE

https://www.johnlewis.com/reiss-flossy-midi-dress-pink/p115216026

https://www.boden.com/products/women-ruffle-silk-midi-dress-red-d1678red?variant=42994514231505&tc_ch=ps&tc_ve=goog&tc_so=pmax&tc_me=cr&tc_campid=21221764987&tc_adgroupid=&tc_targetid=&tc_locphys=9194966&tc_matchid=&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21218304686&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V6lAK4HPMLIru01y9sJYZXovL_0v9XyB8wvH3VH3ahzcxhaEE_-R_xoCbo4QAvD_BwE

https://www.mytheresa.com/gb/en/women/alemais-inez-ombre-linen-blend-minidress-red-p01063705?dplink=true&utm_source=sea_pla&utm_medium=google&utm_campaign=google_sea&chn=sea_shopping&src=google&cmp=23742446068&tarea=gb&tar=&ag=&ptyp=&feed_num=P01063705-5&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6VxI0y4VMLH_qUeKU-1xqxPZ2rBM2-Lm-SPsMlpxMjNq0GIwWKwqhyBoCQi8QAvD_BwE&gbraid=0AAAAAD3Pw-ltSEh_qxW9uYAC7TZBWmE7y&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=23737829945&gbraid=0AAAAAD3Pw-ltSEh_qxW9uYAC7TZBWmE7y&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6VxI0y4VMLH_qUeKU-1xqxPZ2rBM2-Lm-SPsMlpxMjNq0GIwWKwqhyBoCQi8QAvD_BwE&slink_id=bb2d0d02-be99-4b41-a203-e7d66ccd599c

https://www.wolfandbadger.com/uk/nina-dress-4/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=18057196750&utm_content=&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18062484476&gbraid=0AAAAADrNWmyZJuOhtWvvp7Npf6m9-n2mi&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V-supnWoc3zaFf326545K5vyK1DaxSau4RHjkBD9h3W1qStu3vc-YxoCwHcQAvD_BwE

https://www.georgiahardinge.co.uk/products/copy-of-opal-dress-floor-length-1?variant=41534646321203

https://www.georgiahardinge.co.uk/products/spiral-dress-floor-length-2?variant=55145120399734

https://thefoldlondon.com/product/salerno-crepe-dress-berry/?_gl=11k4fdxm_upMQ.._gaMTk0ODM3MTMyNi4xNzgxMjE3MTM0_ga_M8JV53WLST*czE3ODEyMTcxMzQkbzEkZzEkdDE3ODEyMTcxNDAkajU0JGwwJGg1NTU5NDY4NDI.&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6Vyy-3rh5BNroYLT42Sp7j5c_KjlKDUFatRwnY134nSn5h3NYOafioxoCHwMQAvD_BwE&gbraid=0AAAAADvgiGrcJDV0X3NhGoA4ZqmxNNY0Z

https://jaki.co.uk/products/ruby-halterneck-satin-dress-raspberry?variant=46979614441726&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21901242466&gbraid=0AAAAACVJXbc28Bo0NU5zVEPMAWAfz3_Eb&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V_uVOqPmVgj8u-NZvkvnhSUsPQD9iYhpYbmN-BKvlH8OCYi1IKhv8BoCzGYQAvD_BwE

https://www.prettylittlething.com/product/coast-one-shoulder-ruffle-crepe-pencil-midi-dress_bcc11293?colour=flame+red&size=8&srsltid=AfmBOordhrCA93ik9wJwfr0px4ZTx4MCPjRQESbiU1tF-YhKztpfxofgY6E

https://www.azazie.com/gb/products/hatsu-tangerine-maxi-dress-atelier-dress/112571154?campaigncountry=GB&utm_term=1078029&utm_term=&country=GB&currency=GBP&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=22433307798&utm_content=&gad_source=4&gad_campaignid=22433308758&gbraid=0AAAAAobpxK-VNckjBU4hMg2ZhqrrD9lvN&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6VwGEbZTL2fJbohx9DS-GVZ1xnRU614LyH55ptfGBu2RgrIafTz0csBoCG_QQAvD_BwE

https://www.asos.com/maya/maya-floral-embellished-v-neck-kimono-sleeve-ruffled-maxi-dress-in-amber/prd/210962528?_gl=11iam2a0_upMQ.._gs*NA..&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V6lyBEO7hZ0tR5GBLRyI4Kxvn2tiAXHXdUFn7go6JHTkVTZ9KbTnThoCI9kQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&gbraid=0AAAAADqFjOCp6jDuC7aiscHRSyB4dRgL0#colourWayId-210962541

https://www.asos.com/nobodys-child/nobodys-child-occasion-nala-high-neck-sleeveless-bow-back-maxi-dress-in-orange-floral/prd/210157331?_gl=15mqrf4_upMQ.._gs*NA..&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V6lyBEO7hZ0tR5GBLRyI4Kxvn2tiAXHXdUFn7go6JHTkVTZ9KbTnThoCI9kQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds&gbraid=0AAAAADqFjOCp6jDuC7aiscHRSyB4dRgL0#colourWayId-210157335

https://www.dvf.com/collections/wedding-guest/products/tansy-dress-lemon-curry

https://clubllondon.com/products/destiny-yellow-satin-asymmetric-neck-midi-dress-with-feather-details-cl136382382?variant=55444861190517&currency=GBP&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=google%2Bshopping&gad_source=4&gad_campaignid=23148500531&gbraid=0AAAAADCHewKeH6BYstBdCqRbbIY9-Wfa7&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6V-CMCL9f4-_X3-Q6of015VK--wJyM14ZEw1llrCae1nTQeb_AWlpOhoCzHAQAvD_BwE

https://www.debenhams.com/product/cy-pleated-long-dress-with-organza-pleated-cape-sleeves-in-yellow_p-12b9a910-3861-458f-bdf9-c9486724818e?colour=Yellow&size=One+Size&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=4&gad_campaignid=22709836258&gbraid=0AAAAABevdS5qZQ5iE_HbqcMI1gAEiwffY&gclid=CjwKCAjwuanRBhBSEiwAY5y6VzvUJpIavuiX5noNNiiiLwyWYz8Bz7Mcw6gSo_6P27WGkQP-3lxuTxoC-sYQAvD_BwE

Some lovely dresses in both your posts. The OP doesn't like patterns though, so I'm guessing that rules the cute Alemais shift & several others out. Anything that's properly maxi/floor-length is IMO more black-tie/formal than cocktail, which is meant to be semi-formal.

Good morning 🌅
I do like this.
https://www.mytheresa.com/gb/en/women/designers/alemais
I also really like the black beaded dress you posted. I think I’m more of a classic style. I definitely suit knee length. I feel swamped and out of proportion with anything longer unless it’s maxi. My arms are ok so I don’t feel self conscious about showing them.

I like this but I’m worried I’ll look like Batman! https://dtcralphlauren.scene7.com/is/image/PoloGSI/s7-AI253980921006_alternate10?$rl_4x5_pdp$

I really like this but I’m worried about the length.

I love this.

I love this look.

I’m a warm autumn. Typically Celtic - pale, prone to sun burn, brown hair and green eyes. Please do post links 🙏

So you need one dress that will bridge daytime summer wedding, as well as evening. And be bright & colourful & follow the code for cocktail dress attire. Plus, as it's a wedding, something that not's so flashy/blingy/revealing that it's overly distracting. That's a slightly trickier balance to achieve than if it were just evening wear.

I dislike being in something really OTT evening-y or very overly sparkly etc during the daytime, especially out-of-doors on a sunny day. It feels a bit weird to me. So I'd probably avoid excessive brightly coloured sequins & sparkles & choose satin/silk/metallic/brocade fabric instead. Those are all better day-to-evening "crossover" fabrics, I think.

That said, I think the khaki sequinned dress I linked above would be fine (with brighter accessories), as it's a single colour not multicoloured, & it's not primary colours. Or a sequinned skirt with a plainer top would work.

It's lovely - if you're fine with black plus coloured accessories. Though it's now out of stock in your size & I can't see it being sold elsewhere! Sign up for a reminder if it comes back in?

Having given the dress code a bit more thought, I think I personally would try for my dress being a fairly bright colour, as well as the accessories. So I would probably avoid black, muted pastels & sludgy colours ... which might be your preferred colours, OP??!

I think that this is a style of dress that can easily overwhelm the wearer.

Thank you so much for your help 🙏 I veer towards blues, greens, gold, dark brick red and coral.