Help me find a mid-length but not frumpy haircut!

[Blondbombsite]

I’ve been growing my hair for a good few years but have had it every length under the sun in the past.

I’m bored of it now and have decided it’s time for the chop and originally wanted it to be shoulder length but I’m going to donate my hair and it needs to be at least 8” which would take us to bob length. I’ve got a 17 month old and am 20 weeks pregnant so want something low maintenance but don’t want to look like I’ve given up and gone for a mum bob.

I’ll attach a pic of my my hair but there’s lots of it and I have a cow’s lick so a full fringe doesn’t work (but a side fringe does). It’s pretty straight but has developed a slight wave over the last few years.

Just to add these pics are from good hair days (it’s usually flatter but it has more bounce when it’s short). I’ve got a round face which is particularly exaggerated now I’m pregnant too.

but don’t want to look like I’ve given up and gone for a mum bob. right so you think everyone who has a bob is a mum who's given up?!!

That's not what she said!

I understand OP and following hopefully for inspiration- I find Pinterest is shit for this.

Yes, that’s why I’m looking for suggestions for bob length hairstyles 🙄

Yeah I’ve got a few pinned but lots are either wigs, extensions or so heavily photoshopped and styled that the minute you move they’d look shit (or be in your eyes all day)

I’ve had plain bobs before and loved them, so no judgement on bobs! The difference is that I was a lot younger and thinner then. I’ve had a rough few years and already feel haggered and frumpy so want a nice haircut that makes me feel good about myself. I don’t think the kind of pics I’ve attached would look the same on me now.

Maybe cut hair to a one length shoulder basic ‘bob’ shape , softened by a few layers and long bangs that will tuck behind your ears ?

You have lovely hair and a gorgeous face.

I’ve had properly short hair before too and asymmetric cuts but I felt like I needed to make more effort with makeup etc then and that’s just not my lifestyle now, I think short hair and more casual clothes (I wfh) would make me feel quite scruffy. Again this is not a judgment on anyone else, just how I’d feel about myself at the moment.

Italian bob?
www.thehairbros.com/our-cuts/the-italian-60s-bob

Ok I've misunderstood maybe. What is a mum bob that you're so keen to avoid? Any pics?

Is this what you mean by mum bob?

I think that pixie where you're holding the microphone looks best.

Thank you 😊, unfortunately I don’t think I have the face to pull that off in the same way now.

I used ‘mum bob’ as a shorthand that I thought most people would get but it seems I’ve just confused things. I suppose I mean the kind of bobs I had in the past, I could pull them off then as I was younger but I don’t think they’d look the same now. It’s not just age, Anna Wintour looks great with a plain bob with fringe- I’d look like a prison guard.

I suppose I just want something that will still feel sexy and not as if I’ve lost my identity and gone for a sensible cut.

Dear me, since when did we have to explain our style preferences on S&B?

I know what you mean, OP. To be honest, you look fantastic in every pic and I doubt you’re ever going to look frumpy. Choose whatever you like, you have the face for it.

Mum bob is used on Mumsnet to denigrate women. Honestly, OP you know you don't look haggard - just Google, see what you like and talk to your hairdresser.

Wow people have the claws out today…! 😳

op I think you have lovely hair. I would just get it cut to the shortest layer at the front and have some texture / longer layers put through it to give it some movement.

Like this. Although a lot of it is styling.

That looks like what OP had when she was younger that she now wants to avoid

I think a choppy bob messed up with hair putty and perhaps a bit of colour - pastels? Would do this?

I've had the same debate as you recently as I had mine cut into a jaw length bob and when I have it straight I hate it. Feels too polished and neat! I've got naturally curly hair which I straighten and then recurl and it looks like the picture posted just before my post, much nicer....a shaggy bob we used to call them in the 90s. Are you brave enough to go for a wolf cut?

Yeah I guess so… maybe there’s only so many variations of a non you can have!

I am but prefer them a bit longer. I think when they’re above the shoulder they become a bit thin and would empathise a round face. A shaggy bob might be the way to go!

I think you’re right and I’m asking for the impossible really 😂

I’m not denigrating anyone except myself, I’m not saying that I’m horrendous looking or hate myself but objectively after a rough few years and a non-sleeping baby I’m aware that I’ve aged and look more tired than before with a fatter face.

I suppose I’ve always liked my hair and had fun with different styles, I just want this cut to still make me feel that way. Like many mum’s I sometimes feel like I’ve lost my identity a bit, to me the phrase ‘mum bob’ kind of sums up these fact that you’re projecting an image to the world of being a mum first, I don’t want that- I want to still be me.