OK MN I'm calling you on this one

[EuniceDumbsdown]

Regular troll name changer starts nasty thread on Style & Beauty. You get masses of reports - even one from me! But you are leaving it because

"the OP is a long time Mumsnetter, who from time to time writes mischievous thread like this one.

She's a good egg though, and we know she doesn't mean any harm. With this in mind, we're going to leave the thread as it is"

So she deliberately starts a goading thread about fat people (again) but that's okay because she's deemed harmless not hurtful.

And I'm not fat so not taking it personally just asking for MNHQ to be consistent.

Eggy
I think she namechanges because of a RL stalker, not to mislead or troll.

Just read the Breton Top thread, and I have to say that it is ridiculous. I bet that had I posted the same statement, there would have been no controversy at all. There are some really nasty comments on there too, and not from Der Fisch.

This is a bit daft, isn't it?

Answering the question put to me - no, it's not 'nice' to make issue of the anthropometry of a contestants upper arms, particularly as it is the Mid Upper Arm Fat Area that is the focus of such a thread, rather than the Mid Upper Arm Muscle Area Enjoy reading about various measurements that can be taken

However, whether 'nice' or not, it is not comparable to discriminations of sex/race/disability/age/gender because (barring surgery for sex change) the person in those groups is unable to change it. Any such description is completely by virtue of their genetics.

A person's weight can fluctuate, can be reversed, can be accelerated. Yes, there may well be conditions that hinder the person in either maintaining or returning to a desired weight, but it is not genetically impossible.

On the subject of the poster in question...does it matter who it is? Would it matter if the 'good egg' had turned out to be Maryz, Custardo, Aitch, Soupdragon or anyone else? It sounds as if people have issue because they've realised that the poster is one who used to have an iconic nickname and now that they change their name a lot, posters get riled that they are still 'a good egg' in MNHQ's eyes despite posting annonymously.

I think that 80% of threads on here are not 'nice', tbh. It's horrible if you recognise yourself in posts. It stings. If MNHQ delete everything which stings, there will be no MN.

I think they've got the balance about right on this one, regardless of who the poster is. Illegal discrimination - delete. If not...campaign for weight discrimination to be illegal. I'll be amazed if it gets through.

Eggys spot on.

Sometimes posts hurt people. Even if that's not the intention. I have huge respect for a poster that goes " didn't intend to upset you, that was not my intention, I am sorry I have made you feel that way". That acknowledgement shows decency.

Sure the post is within the guidelines. No the hurt party didn't have to post.

But the moment you've reached that point where someone says "hang on a minute...". you've got two choices, to either give a shit or not. And if you openly choose not to give a shit than you can't complain about the consequences.

If I had a stalker, I wouldn't keep drawing attention to myself in this completely transparent and predictable way. Slagging off groups of people who behave/dress/look a certain way isn't really like food, water or oxygen ie. an unavoidable thing is it ? It's clearly done as an enjoyable pastime.

She gets namechecked pretty much every time, too.

I'm all for freedom of speech despite any stalkers and don't think she should be silenced at all

But why the sniping, and the snidery ? It's un-necessary, and I do think it's ok to question it.

It all goes back to Hully/Cod and the Moldies. It brings the whole site down imo. They should be banned.

In the Days of Yore, cod posted all over MN, joined in chat threads, had long running potty training support threads, and most people knew who she was. So when she posted the 'fat people dress funny and hurt my eyes' threads, people knew it was her and laughed or told her to shut her yap.

However now she namechanges frequently and only seems to post on S&B, and mostly on the mocking what other people wear type of threads. And the majority of posters don't know who she is anymore.

So most posters will see someone who namechanges to post an inflammatory thread and then apparently scuttles back to another forum (Twitter) to snigger about the result. We've had other posters like that before; usually they get deleted by MN as trolls.

Ah, I see. Thanks for the explanation, Zachary.

"Honestly if you need protection against someone criticising your footwear you really need to get some perspective."
^^
Yy to this.

And I will stick my neck out and say there are some ladies showing waaaaay to much cleavage on CDWM also.

Sometimes people moan about the smallest things

I've seen miles worse all over MN that that CDWM thing

Get lives

Hully/cod and the Moldies?

Ambrosia - I don't know that Hully was here when the Moldies happened.

Or did you just put people you don't like in a line?

If we are just allowed to list who we personally think brings the site down that could take some time.
I would like to ban everyone who posts 'oh get a fucking grip. It's not all about you. You sound vile' on a thread about something like crisps.
But that's not my call.
And anyway I wouldn't list actual posters because that would make me a cunt.

I hate all this "back in the old days stuff", some of the most annoying and tedious posters, old and new on here are the "personas", who always post the same type of self-aggrandising response, regardless of topic or tone.

Actually can I apologise for my post. I have asked mnhq to delete them both. They are uncalled for and unhelpful.

I am quite accepting that some people are upset at the tone on areas of the board and that is valid enough for discussion.

But many of those issues are being swamped by axe grinding and persuing of a few key posters. It's personal and uneccesary but any attempt to defend them just means you get called a suck up, a bully or a lackey.

It's all no win . I am going back to the bar

I was only trolling, and I'm sure you don't think I'm really a cunt, Pagwatch. Life is too short for this kind of nonsense.

Peace out man.

You are right ambrosia . I really, really don't.
I was ranomly venting after a week of fight club on here.

I will indeed peace out

Yes. I am staying up all hours to be a twat

or on holiday

One of those two. Or both actually

Returning to this thread now that dh has given me my laptop back - posting from my phone is just tedious.

I think that we massively underestimate the importance of body image. I'm overweight and I don't give two hoots about that. I am comfortable in my own skin. I just don't think the personal appearence of women is a 'funny' subject. I think that people appearing on television invite comment but I think that wanting to comment on the size of a person's arms is just desperately shallow and more importantly contributes to a society where beauty really is skin deep. It's always womens beauty isn't it? Always used as an attack point.
A mate of mine has had an internet run in with some total twats this weekend. One of the (many) insults flung at her is that she has 'scrawny tits'. Personal appearence is the go to place for insults. Too fat or too thin, there's always a peg to hang abuse on and that's what's wrong with the S&B thread.

Only on page 5 but had to say..."touch of the sunset boulevards" is magnificent

Am now on page 6 (so this is probs covered but still in the interests of fairness)

PORE OL MNHQ DID SAY THEY HAD PROBS BEEN WRONG ABOUT SPOONS, but let's face it, they are so deluged by po complaints, they get a bit stressed...

Agreed NorthernLurker

What I like about Mnet is that when I posted on here that my dh had been considering sex with his work colleague Mnetters I mentioned it to went "your dh is a fucking twat".

When I mentioned it in RL people immediately went "oh, but you're so much prettier than her".

Well, I know I prefer the women who don't immediately blame the other woman, and do recognise a douchebag. It didn't matter what either of us looked like.

If Mnet is going to become a place where aesthetics is the be all and end all, and those that don't spend their life battling their bodies to fit some taut mould of banality, before they are considered worthy enough to be exempt from malice, than Mumsnet can go boil its head.

May I respectfully suggest, dear MNHQ, that part of the porblem IS the proliferation of rules.

So people complain about personal attacks = rule

people say Ooo trolling = rule

people complain about "goading" = rule

These are then open to different interpretations, hair splitting, angels on pinheads etc

Whereas, if people dealt with stuff on the thread, if someone said, Oh shut up fishface you horrid old caaaaah etc, then a hoo-ha ensued, then the thread could be deleted for a bunfight without all the 95 aggro spin off threads about rules and how they is applied to different posters.

See? Bloody genius.

So 99.9% of problems could be solved by posting

WANKAAAAAAAAAAR!

and then discussing the aforementioned with passion and forthrightness?