what's this PO stuff all about? I have just read some really vile stuff on here....

[Portofino]

Women presumably who don't have a certain sense of humour, or don't agree with certain (long standing) posters being described as beige admin workers who nag their ugly husbands, who were friendless at school, wear cheap clothes, have no fun in their sad little joyless lives etc etc Literally paragraphs and paragraphs of nastiness.

This is some of the most vile and misogynistic stuff I have ever read on MN from other women. These kind of comments normally come from trolls and MRA invasions. Is this really what MN has become? Does everyone think that this sort of shit should stand? What happened to the fucking sisterhood?

I am astounded to be quite honest.

Lenin talks sense, as usual

lenin? wow? new name? which one?

I think this thread's been fascinating really, in terms of how people see MN and the various different posters/friendships on it.

As much as I agree with 'calling' posters at the time if you disagree/think they're out of order, I can totally understand why some people feel they can't do that.

Some people can express/defend their opinion more eloquently than others. Some people are afraid of being flamed and some don't give a toss.

I'm guessing if anyone had posted on a thread moaning about POs - to 'call' someone for being out of order, they would have been buried under an avalanche of PO accusations...so probably not a wise move.

So ( and bear with me because I've totally lost my train of thought due to spilling a hot cup of tea in my lap ) I guess threads like his make the 'lone voices' realise that actually, they're not as alone as they thought?

I have gone and had a reread of the thread - lemon you did come on and put your pov - and I was an arse to you actually. Which makes me feel pretty shamefaced. So I am sorry for being a cow.

You're name makes me feel very guilty anyway, I bought a 12 pack of swedish lemon muffins the other day and ate the whole pack in 2 days.

but worra. it was one thread out of thousands....easy to ignore. like we all ignore many many threads. it wasnt some mahoosive invasion of mn. i do thik it needs to be kept in perspective.

YOUR

I cannot remember whether when I saw the thread if it was full or not. TBH I hesitated as well because it was full of very well known, head girl type, prolific posters who I find intimidating. I know I was not the only person to feel that way. I would far rather take on a room full of hormonal fifteen year old boys lesson 5 on the last Friday of the term than have posted what I thought on that thread.

That actually makes me rather pathetic and I am sorry for that.

You're right Madame it was easy to ignore.

But my post was more about the reasons why some people perhaps felt they couldn't 'speak up' on that (or any other) thread IYSWIM?

That's why this thread might make them feel that they're not alone in the way they think...because there may have been others who also felt they'd be PO'd into oblivion if they said what they thought.

On the other hand I could of course be talking complete bollocks.

It's been known to happen on occasions

On occasion Worra? Just on occasion?

I think instinctively people avoid those who are not willing to listen to, or hear, the views of others.

You didn't spot the 's' on the end did you Frank

It's a healthy self-protection thing, nothing pathetic about it, Arisbottle.

Ah, it would appear not. That's better.

I think thr problem lies more with those who cant cope with being disagreed with!

and when several people disagree with them, call it bullying or cliques

It is daft, because in real like I am fucking rock hard.

Worra - agree completely

Arisbottle after a statement like that, I hope to God you're not a bloke

I am really sorry you see it like that Hully because the incidents I have seen have been very far from that.

I'm not saying it doesn't happen as you describe but it is not the case all the time.

Sorry Hully, but I don't agree with that.

Its possible to disagree with someone and have a debate. Its different if you shut someone down by telling them that they're a po, or don't get the joke or humour, or are jealous as they are not as witty / popular / whatever.

Sometimes that is the case, Hully.

Sometimes it's just too pointless to bother. We all know full well any objections to certain posts would've been dismissed as po.

I dont know, Mrs w, I dont see that, honestly I dont, but maybe it happens on threads I'm not on.

Quite, Babyheave.

Thanks Getoeuf. Appreciate that.

im not well known. and having had a break for over a year i know i am on newbie level. but i have really seen a difference on many many threads which feels just as much like bullying as any other. a little quip to lighten the mood is ignored. people dont engage with each other except to sneer. it horrible. you might feel that thread was headgirly but i promise you from my perspective its like we have a whole new prefect layer that just loves lording it over other posters.