Porn

[Hmmiwonder]

What are people's thoughts on porn usage in a relationship? Is it a natural thing to do? Is it potentially damaging to the relationship? Does it have any reflection on how one might feel towards their partner? What are your thoughts on it? And do you watch it if you're in a relationship?

er because it's about sex.
It isn't hidden of course - you found it.
If it was in a more upfront place on the forum doubtless there would be complaints.
Of course some people like to complain.

It started on AIBU and got moved. This forum is not a part of Mumsnet I take part in otherwise I wouldn’t have seen the thread at at.

well welcome to the sex forum.

See the second most read article here, from the house journal of the British Sociological Association. Full article should be available for free https://journals.sagepub.com/home/soc

One more point relating to this article, subject - people, women increasingly, watch porn, but are aware of its degrading, exploitative aspects, so do discriminatingly (yes, I know this is separate from children's access) -, a claim based on stats from statisica on Pornhub: The ‘Reality’ category made a whopping 165% growth in 2022. Additionally, in the United States, searches for ‘Real Homemade’ content saw an impressive surge of 310% in 2022. From this, you can gather that people crave the real deal when it comes to sex. They want intimacy, passion, and pleasure shared by real-life couples without the smoke and mirrors. It seems pizza delivery pornos are a dying art!

The problem with porn is that the genie is out of the bottle
so it’s so easy to acess versus 10 years ago

i even watch some select videos myself now

i think if they do it privately and you don’t know about it …. It’s not an issue

its when it becomes an issue it’s a tough one

genie porn?
I'm clearly so yesterday.

It's instant gratification. Cookies, cigarettes, drink, speeding, what's your poison.

I do enjoy watching the lesbian porn on a good quality site.
The one I watch most has 'Girl on Girl' films of the same quality as a movie. They are actresses in a specialised market.
Sometimes I go to a UK site for a minor kink stuff.
My GFs have mainly liked these movies.
Never did watch any kind of porn when married to a man.

interesting - what do you put this shift of interest down to?

@FordAnglia I got married about 20 years ago and the Porn was rough and IIRC mostly on Video Tape. Not attractive to most women. H did not watch it as I know of.
Firstly I suppose I used it as a guide to what do women actually do with each other together. As actresses their caressing and kissing is very sexy, I try to be like that when I am with a GF.

So often sex is about what men do to women. These are showing mutual enjoyment.
Now it is a few minutes of part of my time to relax. Sometimes it is part of my 'Pleasure Time'.
I think it is another example of the way I changed after the split from exH.
(My) Sexuality is more fluid than I thought.

What do you watch?

thanks for polite interesting reply @Janinejones

appreciated.

there are it should be said what might be termed "stronger" flics for lesbian couples so inclined.

Best probably I don't answer your last question - am male and the forum festivaloflight would doubtless descend.

(though will say that I have sometimes watched porn with female partners - not a lot - sometimes)

@FordAnglia , Interesting that you remark on 'stronger' styles. Violence is always implied if not depicted in those and that is why it's not for me. I did befriend a lady, a committed lesbian who had an armoury of toys, no other word sums it up. I did not go back for another date with plastic and an elegantly shaped glass which was not an ornament to any room!
I think of myself as Bisexual not lesbian.
The 105E was cute, good for driving practice. but the Capri was much faster, not allowed to drive it though.

@Janinejones
you might possibly find this film interesting - or maybe your swerved lady friend might.

https://www.theguardian.com/film/2021/nov/24/rebel-dykes-review-the-unstoppable-rise-of-the-raddest-of-the-radical-lesbians

It's not a porn film I stress though there are references to somewhat porny happenings in a patch of London that is now somewhat more sparkly.

Recommended though - interesting, fun.

@FordAnglia Thank you for sending that info, interesting but not my scene. As well as their style there is a willingness or is it enjoyment in confrontation which leads to aggression.
One of the reasons I shy away from calling myself a lesbian is that I have never lived in a city based working class social world. Much more a country market town upbringing. Private day schools, farms, my own pony sort of life.

Yes I am aware of anomalies in the preceding para. Life is often contradictory.
Do look at Bellesa.com to see what I like.
Do you think we are hijacking @Hmmiwonder Thread? I hope she doesn't mind.

Not for me and my good lady, it’s a deal breaker for both of us.

I'm sure more or most people watch porn now and more than people did before, as it is so easy to get. So it probably depends on the individual relationship for what is acceptable or agreeable.

I have talked about it lots of times with my husband and he honest enough to tell me that he has watched porn since he was younger and he started watching it in his teens. I personally don't mind porn itself, but like most people I'm sure, my husband can't just watch it for 10 minutes and turn it off, he gets turned on quickly and then really needs to masturbate.

So I don't mind him watching now and again, I just don't think that watching porn everyday is a healthy thing.