Do men really prefer a fully shaved/ waxed woman?

[PhillipaLalla]

Hi all,

Slightly embarrassing topic. After a drunken chat with a group of friends (mix of men and women) I am starting to question what I have always thought was common or expected in terms of women's intimate grooming.

During the convo, all the male friends said they prefer it when women are fully shaved/ waxed down there. All of them! They said it is better for oral and a turn on in general. Also most of the female friends seemed to agree and implied that that was their preferred style.

I was a bit surprised, as I never realized that had become the expected norm and most popular style? I must have been living under a rock! Especially considering that I have been single for a couple of years

Of course I acknowledge people have different tastes and expectations and not everyone is the same.

I have no desire to get drawn in a debate with anyone as to why I choose to remove my own pubic hair, nor was it the original issue raised by the OP. I’m in my 40s now and been doing so since mid teens; that’s more time without pubic hair than with. I have had men ask me to grow it and known women who are lesbian remove it.

Rather than porn, my own personal influences were French Art (I was brought up in France) my late mother, who kept hers ever so closely trimmed (nudity was never a big deal at home) and my elder sister who whips it all off. There is not a lot of porn influence there!

Another influence for many in recent times has been the brevity of lingerie, swimwear and gossamer fabrics, I am sure. It’s not that we all want to be porn stars! Far from it.

As for evidence throughout history, I do not pretend to be an historic expert, furthermore several things I have read have been in French, which I won’t search for again to link here even if I could find them. That said, you may wish to look at Wiki - Pubic hair removal, not linking here as it contains perfectly normal photos which still may offend some or, maybe take a look at this:

I have no desire to get drawn in a debate with anyone as to why I choose to remove my own pubic hair, nor was it the original issue raised by the OP. I’m in my 40s now and been doing so since mid teens; that’s more time without pubic hair than with. I have had men ask me to grow it and known women who are lesbian remove it.

Rather than porn, my own personal influences were French Art (I was brought up in France) my late mother, who kept hers ever so closely trimmed (nudity was never a big deal at home) and my elder sister who whips it all off. There is not a lot of porn influence there!

Another influence for many in recent times has been the brevity of lingerie, swimwear and gossamer fabrics, I am sure. It’s not that we all want to be porn stars! Far from it.

As for evidence throughout history, I do not pretend to be an historic expert, furthermore several things I have read have been in French, which I won’t search for again to link here even if I could find them. That said, you may wish to look at Wiki - Pubic hair removal, not linking here as it contains perfectly normal photos which still may offend some or, maybe take a look at this:

www.historyundressed.com/2008/03/ladies-have-you-ever-forgotten-to-shave.html

renresearch.wordpress.com/2012/12/09/did-renaissance-women-remove-their-body-hair/

Now, can we please credit all women with some inteligence, no matter what their choices without involving the Pubic Hair Police.

Starlight- I don’t think your links support your position as much as you think they do. In particular the Wordpress one.

I opted for 2 links which I thought fairly balanced and showed both sides of the coun, which I think is the best way to present things.

I think some French sites were better written but that leads to translation probs for many.

I will bow out of this one now, hair free and proud to be so.

StarlightLady I saw your post about oral. I am 44 and never shaved so genuinely interested to read your post. Does it honestly enhance the experience for the woman?

"I think it looks amazing and is so much better to go down on!"

If I shaved in the morning, I'd have stubble by the evening or the next day so you'd expect the woman to shave every day or even twice a day? Or do you like stubble?
With waxing, hair comes back after about a week, but my waxer (only ever done bikini line) only allows waxing once a month so the woman would be hairy for 3 out of 4 weeks anyway.
Does that look good?

"It looks better, especially when moisturised."

Can you explain this? Because moisturiser is invisible once absorbed.

I don't find that the presence or otherwise of pubic hair has the slightest influence on how oral feels, nor do I see why it would; no hair grows on the relevant area anyway. I acknowledge that if it's an awkward length it can get in the way for the giver a bit, but there's a long way from that to waxing yourself completely bald.

Starlight, many of us (1) read French and (2) are aware that non-peer-reviewed blog posts are not credible sources for making historical arguments. One of yours is still recycling the old myth that Ruskin was unmanned by Euphemia Grey’s body hair, apart from anything else.

This is simply a case of personal choice. It doesn't and wouldn't bother me either way but I personally prefer a lady to be 'natural'. I don't think it's a case of 'fuck what men think' either. It depends on your own personal relationship of course but taking your partners opinion into account is a reasonable request I think? I shave and don't have a beard because my oh prefers me to clean shaven. It's not a case of 'fuck what you think'. In a loving, caring relationship, surely you compromise on all sorts of things? But I prefer her to have the 'lady' look, so she does nothing more than trim which she prefers as well.

Heavens, what a despicable comment. Reported.

I wonder why nobody ever says “Yes it is to do with porn. I had never thought of doing it before I saw it there. I decided to try it and I loved it, so I carried on”

@BertrandRussell maybe because they genuinely don’t feel like their choice has been influenced by porn? I have no hair down it, because I like the way it looks, the way it feels (I hate the feel of pubes) if a partner wanted me to grow it back, I’d possibly trial it (as I’d ask him to trial a clean shaven face if he wasn’t) but I doubt I’d keep the change for good.

@bertrand was it porn that started women shaving their legs or underarms?

My wife hates me having a beard, is that a porn thing?

Can you really not see a reason why shaving faces, legs and underarms are less likely to be porn related than shaving pubic hair?

Well, I never thought I’d see a day when BR posted in the sex topic.....

No question in my mind that trends in porn has influenced waxing. Brazilian waxing places started appearing in far greater numbers in London late 90’s. For sure some women might have shaved it all off before then but getting a full wax in newcastle in 1995? No chance.

The problem is how many men now seem to think having pubes is a no no / gross / unhygenic. I just dont get it. If a woman told me they wanted me to wax my chest or hairy legs because it was gross/unsexy they’d get a somewhat anglo saxon response!
Do it for yourself, no problems at all but the fact you can pay somoen to do it for you is ultimately down to porn imho.

Can you really not see a reason why shaving faces, legs and underarms are less likely to be porn related than shaving pubic hair?
Actually no I can't. I am talking about the basis of the idea, not the actual implementation. Clearly the shaving of legs etc is pre motion movie type porn. Rather I am talking about the mindset requiring women to remove hair at all. Once you start with legs, underarms etc, is the pubic region not just an extension of that ideology? My point being that the mindset requiring women to remove hair is longer than movie type porn. Then there is the cultural aspect.

The men I’ve met who shave their tackle are literally only doing it for sexual reasons, mostly because they think it makes them look bigger. I find it all a bit try hard myself ( no pun intended) and a bit creepy. I prefer a natural look on a bloke even if they are really hairy - thinking of Ant on that SAS programme.....Sorry where was I....

but I get a wax because I’m super hairy and got fed up of having to check I didn’t have loo roll caught in it rather than spontaneously getting down to business.

I think this is a major generational thing. I’m nearly 40 and I’m fairly confident that I’m the only one of my friends who keeps a Hollywood going on.

My DP is a little younger than me and he keeps himself shaved too.

It may well have started in porn but it has now moved firmly into main stream ‘fashion’ and is mostly certainly not for porn addicts only.

I do it because I think it looks more sexually attractive so see all my bits in their beautiful naked glory. But mostly for practical reasons. Me and DP enjoy a lot of oral sex. No one wants pubes in their teeth or tickling their throat. Simple really.

I always find the whole “who cares what men think” bridgade so hilarious. Yes my loves, you stay up there on your high and mighty pedestals while your partner chokes on your pubes. I’m staying down here in the gutter and gonna get myself some awesome oral sex 👍🏻👅😊

I agree, LittleMiss, I'm an avid waxer, have been for many years and it's 'all off' for me. I still advocate a 'who cares what men think' view - and have expanded it to include women because of a vociferous group who believe they're entitled to poke their noses into issues that are none of their business.

What I find a bit irritating is that 'mansplaining' is jumped on the minute that it happens yet when a hirsuit woman dictates that a hair-removing woman cannot feel x, y, z about her own body, they largely get away with it. There doesn't seem to be a pithy rebuttal and I'm thinking, in the interests of equality, that the term should just be 'twatsplaining'.

I don't think it's anything to do with porn. Yes in porn everyone is shaved/waxed but porn is also full of men coming on the woman's face. Why then given the choice I prefer a woman fully shaved, but I find the idea of ejaculating on a woman face disgusting and disrespectful?

A previous partner wouldn't dream of not shaving her armpits as she thought having hair there was unhygienic, but equally wouldn't dream of shaving her pubes because not having hair there was unhygienic. Never could understand that.

• No I'm not judging anyone who wants to come on their partner's face (or who wanted their partner to come on their face) any more than I'm judging women who shave or don't. It's personal preference.

"A previous partner wouldn't dream of not shaving her armpits as she thought having hair there was unhygienic, but equally wouldn't dream of shaving her pubes because not having hair there was unhygienic. Never could understand that."

The skin 'down there' is much more sensitive. That's why having pubic hair is protective. I suspect we've evolved out of the original reason for having armpit hair.

I can't shave or wax down there, it's fucking agonising, and itches constantly until fully regrown. Never again.

And as for a man being allowed to insult natural women on Mumsnet with choice "unkempt minge" phrases - that's disgusting. Creepy asshole on the sex topic again. I'm glad I'll never have to remotely touch or encounter you in real life.

In fairness (notwithstanding the fact the terminology was grim) the comment was clarified as applying to both sexes.

Yes in porn everyone is shaved/waxed

No they're not.

Bloke here - love the bush of a lady garden, love the armpits.
It's not a fetish, I just like natural humans and I would say that religions always focus control on food and hair (think about it) cover your hair in church as a christian woman, ALWAYS cover your hair as a muslim woman, replace your hair with a WIG as a jewish woman, so eat this and don't eat that. Blah blah blah - it's all about control.

Now there's a weird orthodoxy that we should all (as men and women) shave off all our pubic hair ! For who? to honour which weird god or orthodoxy? Fuck off. Pubes are groovy. I like a the growling marxist hairy cunt of the 80s, I like a woman who has no idea why she should shave herself ever or at all. My pubes are ginger and fucking horny.