Oh I see Shy. I don't know what to suggest really. Like the others say - ban penetration for a few days and explore each other's bodies more? You said you tried the massaging didn't you?
I think men are more 'knob-centred' and don't always understand how we women like to be wooed and caressed and all that passionate kissing - that really gets me going - would hate it if that stopped but i had an ex who didn't like it too and it drove me nuts! Obviously HD is not one of them and luckily for me nor is my new(ish) dp but teaching someone who is stuck in their ways is hard. It is hard to find the words I know.
How about a game where he has to do everything you tell him and nothing else and you can direct him. If he saw how much it turned you on maybe he's take the hint!!!!
Huggybear - congratulations on the orgasm!!! I gave you some advice ages ago about it (you probably ignored me but I'm evangelical on this subject - like a reformed smoker because I'm someone who didn't have an orgasm til I was 37!!)How did you do it and was it great???