I fell in love with a guy and we became "official." Out of nowhere, after 8 months, he dumped me for no reason. Turns out he was cheating on me the whole time and had another woman. After a while, he came back, said he regretted it, and because I loved him, I believed him and took him back. But guess what? He hadn't dropped the other woman at all.
Looking back, I realize he never actually saw me as a girlfriend; he put zero effort into me and never even bought me a single gift. I was basically just a convenience to him. Furious, I went to find the other girl and told her everything. Instead of being reasonable, she blamed me, said "he's going to be mine," and literally kissed him right in front of my eyes. And get this: even though she knows he cheated on her too, she chose to stay with him because apparently, he's very good in bed.
That whole scene completely crushed my pride and it's eating me alive inside. Now, I don't want a relationship with him anymore, but I've developed this weird, unhealthy obsession—I can't seem to be intimate with anyone else, I can't stand anyone else touching me, and I keep craving his scent.
The guy is now messaging me saying, "Don't tell her anything, let's keep hooking up."
Should I go along with this and keep seeing him, or am I just doing myself a massive disservice and destroying my own self-respect? Has anyone else dealt with this kind of toxic fixation? How did you break it?