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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH wants us to go Left Handed. HELP.

347 replies

PetulaClarkMementoMori · 07/07/2026 16:58

Not sure if this is the correct thread, but here goes....

My DH and I have been together for over 30 years and, as we're getting on we've both become more aware of and conscious to avoid what I suppose is called Cognitive decline.

I enjoy crosswords and reading, so I think I'm at least using my brain daily. DH has never bothered much with what he ( Mostly jokingly ) calls 'Book-Learning'. Anyway, all of a sudden he's become an 'expert'. He told me he'd read an article ( Although I suspect he means he's seen a two- minute video on Tok Tok ) which claims using your left hand for tasks that you would normally use your right hand for can stave off cognitive decline and now he thinks this is a miracle cure-all.
And, of course, he's become obsessed, everything has to be done left-handed, and if he see's me using my right hand, he booms 'Left!'. I can be chopping vegetables or opening a jar of coffee and I'll suddenly hear 'Left!' in my earhole. I've told him it's annoying, but he's as stubborn as a goat that's been struck by lightning.
Yesterday he spent over two hours repairing the lawnmower left-handed and somehow thinks it's turned him into bloody Einstein in a cloth cap.
I've tried suggesting some 'alternatives', as I read that learning a new language is effective. I've always fancied trying Portuguese, or even Hausa or Finnish. But I suspect trying to entice him with any of this will be met with the equivalent of 'Foreign Muck', and it will be the Moussaka situation all over again.
Honestly, I could scream. I know men get fixated, especially as they get older but this is honestly too much. I'm no Carol Vorderman so can someone explain whether there's any truth in his claims of Neural-plasticity in the brain?
I really need to get some answers because if I keep hearing 'Left!' I may well go hard right! In fact, the other day whilst driving he started rabbitting Left! Left! and it was only when I realised that he was pointing to the entrance to the Garden Centre, that I heeded what he was saying.
So, is there any truth to it? And is anyone else's aging husband going as mad as an Aardwark at an all you can eat Ant-Buffet?
I better go, I can hear him rumaging in the airing cupboard and if he see's me typing with two hands it'll be all she wrote. Literally!

OP posts:
whatacroc · 08/07/2026 00:22

thistimelastweek · 07/07/2026 17:02

Ask him if he's now a left-handed wanker or just a wanker.

🤣🤣🤣🤣 brilliant

idkbroidk · 08/07/2026 00:26

well, not only is he a twat, he's a racist twat

99bottlesofkombucha · 08/07/2026 00:28

MrsArcher23 · 07/07/2026 18:22

You could fill a spray bottle with water and every time he shouts at you, squirt him with it (I haven’t tried it on husbands but it stops my pug from scratching the furniture)

This, and shout have you done a crossword today??? Get the waffle app, and go sit near him and talk through doing it every day.
it’s that or murder him so worth trying.

ErrolTheDragon · 08/07/2026 00:35

I must admit when I opened the thread I thought the title was some sort of euphemism, but the reality is better.😂

ClairDeLaLune · 08/07/2026 00:41

Tell him from now on he can only use his left foot so he has to hop everywhere. Then challenge him to kick a football.

CanOnlyBeMyself · 08/07/2026 01:16

The only thing that needs to be left is your husband, OP.

EconomyClassRockstar · 08/07/2026 01:18

Pickleball. What you need is pickleball. Great exercise, great hand eye coordination, great social scene. And if you do it together, you also get the benefit of being able to hit him with your paddle.

JoyousSquid · 08/07/2026 01:21

Not using ChatGPT to write Mumsnet posts probably staves off cognitive decline more than using your left hand...

PlayingDevilsAdvocateisinteresting · 08/07/2026 01:28

godmum56 · 07/07/2026 22:05

have you tried Squaredle? its excellent.

No, but I will look into it, thank you! However, if it starts making smoke come out of my ears, I will give up 😉

PetulaClarkMementoMori · 08/07/2026 03:39

MrsJeanLuc · 07/07/2026 23:12

Oh, bless you!

Parkour is an urban action sport that involves running, jumping, and vaulting over obstacles while adapting your movement to the environment.
Probably not something you want to take up!

Tell him you'll do one activity left handed (preferably one that doesn't involve a sharp knife) if he'll go to a tea dance with you. As the earlier poster said, it's doing something new / different that's important, not using your left hand per se.

Oh good grief, Yes, I've just seen a video of some young Belgian's leaping about like Otters on heat...not for me I don't think, not with my ankles

OP posts:
PetulaClarkMementoMori · 08/07/2026 03:41

JoyousSquid · 08/07/2026 01:21

Not using ChatGPT to write Mumsnet posts probably staves off cognitive decline more than using your left hand...

I beg your pardon Squid? Using ChatGPT? I'm afraid you've lost me.

OP posts:
PetulaClarkMementoMori · 08/07/2026 03:43

idkbroidk · 08/07/2026 00:26

well, not only is he a twat, he's a racist twat

I think you''re on the wrong thread my love. Racist? No-one's mentioned race.

OP posts:
Odditea · 08/07/2026 04:02

What was the Moussaka situation, pray tell?

FeralWoman · 08/07/2026 04:17

Odditea · 08/07/2026 04:02

What was the Moussaka situation, pray tell?

Waiting to find out this too.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 08/07/2026 06:01

If he drives a manual car, tell.him he must now use his right hand to change gear.

Snugglything · 08/07/2026 06:06

Tumbler2121 · 07/07/2026 17:06

I think it’s to do with doing things a bit differently. If you usually go into a shop and work your way round clockwise, do it anti clockwise etc.

get your daft husband to research it further and write a paper on it …

With his left hand presumably

getridofthedamnboxes · 08/07/2026 06:08

Ok, OP is studiously avoiding the moussaka question for reasons unknown. BUT, I’ve read it back and realised it’s just that he called it ‘foreign muck’ (hence the accusation of racism). I’ll sleep better tonight for having read it properly !

SENcatsandfish · 08/07/2026 07:41

Give him a really terrible left handed hand job

TubeScreamer · 08/07/2026 08:48

If this is actually true then it sounds like your dh is having some sort of breakdown.

PetulaClarkMementoMori · 08/07/2026 08:58

TubeScreamer · 08/07/2026 08:48

If this is actually true then it sounds like your dh is having some sort of breakdown.

No, he has all his faculties, he just gets fixated. Men.

OP posts:
PetulaClarkMementoMori · 08/07/2026 09:02

Howyoualldoworkme · 07/07/2026 17:20

I'm interested in hearing about the moussaka situation 🤔

I've put the story up, I'm not sure if it will meet expectations...

OP posts:
sofffty · 08/07/2026 09:20

I'm afraid your writing style is very similar to a good-quality chat bot. You use a lot of very cute and quirky similes and the sentence structure is almost the same.

I'm with Squid on this one.

Beachtastic · 08/07/2026 09:34

sofffty · 08/07/2026 09:20

I'm afraid your writing style is very similar to a good-quality chat bot. You use a lot of very cute and quirky similes and the sentence structure is almost the same.

I'm with Squid on this one.

Oh, don't be daft! OP's writing style is that of a mature adult, and I can't see a chatbot writing something like "I can Julienne with the best of them with my right, but with the left I'm more like Visigoth with a claw hammer" 😁

LimestonePavement · 08/07/2026 09:47

Beachtastic · 08/07/2026 09:34

Oh, don't be daft! OP's writing style is that of a mature adult, and I can't see a chatbot writing something like "I can Julienne with the best of them with my right, but with the left I'm more like Visigoth with a claw hammer" 😁

It’s definitely been run through ChatGPT — the similes are a dead giveaway, as is the way it’s been strung out to something far longer than it needs to be.

PetulaClarkMementoMori · 08/07/2026 10:21

LimestonePavement · 08/07/2026 09:47

It’s definitely been run through ChatGPT — the similes are a dead giveaway, as is the way it’s been strung out to something far longer than it needs to be.

I love your conviction ' It's been run througha chat-bot,' the similies are a giveaway. Erm...humans have been using similies in language well before chat GPT...where do you think they learned it? Your argument is nothing but nonsense confirmation bias.

OP posts: