Does the thought of christmas and who to spend it with (famly members) stress you out?

[DrNortherner]

It does me.

the question 'what are you doing for xmas' from my mother has already come. we've no idea of course, except we'd just like a quiet one ... and a limit of £10 on presents.

In a word YES!

yes
my stress began about a month ago
all i want is to spend it with dh, dd1and dd2, and my mum
but my dad just assumes he is coming to my house too
and dhs family spend about a zillion pounds on each dd and its revolting

i keep wishing i could go on holiday over xmas

no

the year dh and I bought our first house we said 'just us for christmas', and have managed to keep it up.

my family for my birthday (weekend before christmas), PIL for new year.

no arguments.

We used to go to Dh's parents for Xmas as my da was a heavy drinker & I hated Xmas before I got married to dh & moved away.

Then when we had dd we went to IL's the first Xmas & after that we stayed at home, with the IL's coming up Xmas morning to see the kids.

My sister has had my mam & dad the past 2 Xmasses [is that right???] & she is angling that it might be our tunr this year.... hmm... I doubt very much if my parents would find it anywhere near relaxing in this mad house!!

Oh yes

Lots of complicated family combinations this year

But suffice to say that my Christmas day is going to be ruled by what time Bil's ex wants him to see the children

Grrrrrrrr

my brother gets to spend xmas day with just him and his gf
but becuase i have children i have to accomodate the rest of the family

Mrs Badger, that sounds ideal, but I only have a mum, and am an only child, so if she didn't come to me she would be on her own

and as I invite my mum feel honour bound to invite his parents as well

Nailpolish are your parents divorced?

Mine split before I had dd [I mean about 4 weeks before I had dd!!] But they now seem to get on better...

Well past few years we have had my parents for christmas. Dh's Dad and step mum and his mum live localy so we call in on them. This year dh wants just us, so I have to tell my parents this. I am only child and this may upset them.....

Ohh nooo... the thought of both my & dh's parents in the same room for more time than it takes to drink a glass of wine makes my blood run cold!!!!!!!!!!!!!

With you all the way DrNortherner. My ex used to say that, but his parents had a daughter whom they went to every year.

My mum and dad just had me, and I hated the thought of them sat on their own.

they are separated (have been for 15 yrs)
mum asked dad for a divorce and he said "over my dead body" so mum is scared to ask again
it ruins mums xams as well as mine

It would if we did it, but we took a decision many years ago that Christmas was just for us and the children to spend together.

Nope. When we moved in together DH and I decided just us for xmas day. We see one set of parents on boxing day and the other on new years day. We alternate each year. Works perfectly as everyone knows what's what and we now have a lovely xmas day with our DDs and they will effectively have 3 xmas days

Dh and I made a pact last year that we would stay at home from now on, purely for the childrens sake.

If we have to go to one families house, it means either a 30 mile trip or a 70 mile trip and then pressured into arranging something for boxing day so that the familys house we didnt go to, can see us!

If we're out the house the kids cant play with their pressies.

We're quite happy for whoever to come to us and I will cook for anyone but the kids come first imo.

Yes to a certain extent. But it's easier now we have the children as we get to choose a bit more. And it's only a question of my parents or home and both are fine. Only a 14 mile drive for either of us.

Nope, will spend it (god willing) with new DP,DH1, our children and my mom and sister same as last year.

Will be at DH1s this year as it was at ours last year

Oh god yes! I cant stand dhs family, he always wants to spend it with them as do my dc. But i dont want to. I managed to get out of it last year, so will undoubtedly have to go to them this year. I would love just to stay at home with dh & dc only, but thats never gonna happen

Oh yes god oh god

yes

gah ! my SIL is already planning where to go to eat en famille after Christmas - can't begin to think of that stuff yet...

Haychee just be brave

we always have Christmas day here just the three of us - you can do it

it is just the rest of the bloody season that I have to put up with them all

F&Z
Have been brave in previous years, spouted rubbish about having an xmas with my family last year (which worked a treat) but this year im all out of exscuses. It will be just rude if i force him to decline again this year.