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Original poster

Following on from another thread...How soon after giving birth did you start having sex again???

102 replies

Nemo2007 · 29/03/2007 09:56

Just wondering if I am completely odd as people seem shocked that someone with a 6wk old is thinking about sex again. Now with Ds was the longest I waited which was 4wks, DD1 was 3wks and DD2 was 2wks. Now will say I didnt have any stitches but did have tearing with Ds and DD2. Obviously I must be 'quick' back into action as there is only 12mths between the girls.

OP posts:
whywhywhy · 29/03/2007 19:00

god you lot are brave, or keen

doesn't sex after a csec or tear really, really hurt??? (I had no pain issues just no libido whatever)

Original poster
Nemo2007 · 29/03/2007 20:16

I would have thought after c section would be unbearable...as I said I didnt have any stitches etc but slight tears which I didnt feel. I remember the first time after having Ds asking whether I was still the same and DH told me I was quite a bit bigger. After both the girls he told me I was normal but dont know if thats compared to pre children or post Ds..pmsl

OP posts:
EHM · 29/03/2007 20:30

dd was born 24th may 2006, had sex again mid july 2006

Daisypops · 29/03/2007 20:35

4 weeks to the day & I had stitches. I was gagging for it. Poor DP hadn't had any for 7 months. It was FANTASTIC!

Original poster
Nemo2007 · 29/03/2007 20:37

Wonder if it makes a difference as to whether you were into it while pregnant???
I was not so hardly had any from being around 4mths pregnant which might be why I was keen after..lol

OP posts:
Indith · 29/03/2007 20:38

5 weeks? ish? I think anyway (considering ds is 11 weeks you'd have thought I could remember that far back.

Indith · 29/03/2007 20:40

of course you'd have thought it had been years the way dp was gagging for it when in fact we were still having sex at 41.5 weeks and ds was born at 42!

SugaryBits · 29/03/2007 20:48

We waited about 2 weeks with both- which people seem to think is really soon! Seemed liked ages to me!. They were both easy births with no tearing.

On a similar note I always feel really oversexed reading these threads... It seems the consensus is that for a couple with young children, sex once or twice a month is normal (whatever that means) DH & I have sex every day... I'm not a nympho or anything but feel like I'm a minority!!

tigi · 29/03/2007 20:59

bled for weeks here too!!!!!! Am i abnormal???

morningpaper · 29/03/2007 21:03

I couldn't even FEEL that I had a vagina for several weeks

DH would have rattled around

It was 18 months before it was not painful with no. 1 - did it a handful of times to check progress

Rantum · 29/03/2007 21:05

tigi - no I was bleeding for 6 weeks after ds and I had stitches and bruising, not to mention alot of extra fat (dh never minded, bless him, but I felt about as sexy as a large rhino).

Tbh I wouldn't have blamed him if he had been put off! Bfing didnt help, nor did the the sleepless nights, dh's long working hours or the fact that we both only had eyes for our son - really we both lost any real sexual urges for 5 mths. Don't know how normal that is, but I don't care because everything is just fine now - no long term damage done.

Rantum · 29/03/2007 21:07

HAHAHA!!! Me too, morningpaper!

Daisypops · 29/03/2007 21:32

You're not on your own Sugary, me and DP do it at any opportunity. He works shifts so its not every day but we always make up for the days lost

sheepgomeep · 29/03/2007 21:39

5 months for full sex after ds and I had to get pissed to do it,

I was very frightened though and I did have a 3rd degree tear. took ages to heal.

think it was about 7 weeks with dd, didn't tear so it was easier.

foxybrown · 29/03/2007 21:41

DS1 - 4 weeks
DS2 - 8 weeks
DD1 - 6 months
DD2 (due in June) never, ever, ever again.

TwinklemEGGan · 29/03/2007 21:42

Umm well it's been 8 months so far...

Posey · 29/03/2007 21:48

Can't remember exactly but know it was several months with both, more than 6 but less than 12! Stitches with both, particularly nasty first time. Then absolutely knackered and also bf really lowered my libido (both hormonally, but also because of leaking etc felt very un-sexy).
Am absolutely amazed how many of you got back to it in a matter of 2 or 3 weeks

ilovethis · 29/03/2007 21:54

agree with morningpaper - it was at least a year and a bit before it didnt hurt - felt like i had a bit of barbed wire inside me. I had an episiotomy and 10 stitches. With DD2 i tore a bit and had stitches (forgot to ask how many!) but feel almost back to normal now, 6 months later. Weve only done it about 4 or 5 times tho...
Anyone else notice improved sensitivity in that area? I read somewhere its all the extra nerve endings that grow during pregnancy...

Pruni · 29/03/2007 21:58

Message withdrawn

lucyellensmum · 29/03/2007 22:16

no stitches for me, so, um, three days, after being the first q i asked midwife when she came round, must have been the hormones, ive kinda gone off it now!

Original poster
Nemo2007 · 29/03/2007 22:28

lucyellensmum I always wanted it earlier but felt it was somehow wrong..lol I remeber sitting in the bath when Ds was 1wk old think I really wanted to do the deed but was actually quite scared to so I never told DH.

OP posts:
MrsSchadenfreude · 29/03/2007 22:54

6 weeks with DD1.

4 days with DD2 . Bleeding had stopped and I was feeling great!

cece · 29/03/2007 23:05

at all this lack of bleeding after given birth

dd - 12 weeks

ds - only 4 weeks!!

margo1974 · 29/03/2007 23:12

It must have been 6 months after dd1

Still b/f dd2 and do not feel that I could see myself as a sexual being until after I swap dd2 to f/f or cows milk (did that sound poncey? It didn't mean to be)

Greenleeves · 29/03/2007 23:16

With ds1 (six months in wheelchair, six weeks in hospital, two weeks in intensive care, haemorrhage, transfusion, retained placenta, third degree tear plus multiple cervical/vaginal lacerations, 200+ stitches) - about 5 months.

With ds2 (straightforward pregnancy, OK labour, shoulder dystocia, third degree tear and several other lacerations, haemorrhage, transfusion, stitches but fewer than first time) - about 3 months.

But then, I'm a bit of a coward