Is this a red flag? Or am I being too cautious? (online dating)

[MardyPants]

So I've been talking to a man who I met on POF, we've not met in real life yet. He seems alright but incredibly forward about talking about sex. Not sure if I'm just being prudish or if this is just normal nowadays / or just a typical man, always thinking with his dick. We've been talking a couple of weeks over the phone and by text.

Stuff he's said :

I'm really highly sexed, I work out a lot so have loads more testoterone than other blokes so if I'm with a partner I need loads of sex
I'm quite grumpy, but I'll be fine after if you just sort me out (mmm, because grumpy is soooooo hot)
I have a thing about feet. Will you send me a pic of your feet? Will you send me a pic of your feet? Will you send me a pic of your feet? Oh go on!
I like foot jobs, I bet you can imagine what they are
Bet you're thinking, can't wait to rip his clothes off and take advantage
(loads of questions about my feet, are they soft, are they pretty, are they smelly (!) and, will I send a photo)

And he read me a load of guff about tantric sex off some website, over the phone. And not sex related, but has mentioned marriage or marriage related stuff at least 4 times, followed by, am only joking.

Hmmmmm.

More red flags than Lenin doing semaphore.

Nice one tethers :)

The big red marquee made me chuckle

RUUUUUUN!!!!

I met my boyfriend online four years ago and I have no problem with that, but came across my fair share of axe starved idiots on the way! Click block and move on lol

The first of those statements on its own is evidence that you are dealing with a tremendous self-entitled twat and that going any further with him is likely to produce a phone full of pictures of his cock faster than you can say "have you got a big cock?". Oh, and he's an araehole, too.

Well, we all know why he is single! 'Sort me out' sounds like something a 15 year old boy would say. It's selfish. Another poster is currently posting about a husband who sulks if he doesn't get sex when he wants it: think this guy is from the same charm school. How does he think that will win over a potential date? Think you had a lucky escape!

The fact you had to ask is worrying.

Genuinely didn't realise it was so weird / such a grossfest
You don't sound safe to be out on your own, tbh.

Oh love, no. No no no. Just tell him you've got chronic verrucas.

Agree with Flogging - you need a nanny !

Hello, I'm a guy. I've heard similar stories from two female friends, which make me feel that a lot of guys are just dicks.

I have no idea why a man thinks it's okay, on a mainstream dating website, to start talking pornographically about what he wants to do to the woman he's talking to, when he hasn't even met her. That means everything is just a generic fantasy. How alluring is that?

This behaviour reminds me of being about 13-14 at the oldest. It's just porny and belongs to shagging websites only. I hope you don't write us all off, but this is all a bit, ewwww....

Run very fast & if you fall don't take time to get up.

It's not even all the red flags fluttering in the breeze and the general yuckness, but BY CRIKEY THE MAN SOUNDS DULL DULL DULL.

Reset your filters and start again.

I'm genuinely shocked that you can't see the issue here.

He hasn't even met you yet he knows he wants to have a sexual relationship-so he sex focused. How flattering, you could be anyone to him.

He likes talking about sex with a virtual stranger, which means he is selfish in bed-that's a definite fact! He has low self esteem so wouldn't put himself on display by trying to "please you" sexually.

He's told you to expect him to be grumpy and the only way to achieve normal behaviour from his is by having sex with him. So you are just there to please him and again, it's all about sex.

He hasn't even had enough game to try and woo you and make false claims and promises. He's basically said "I'm a selfish shit who will openly sexually blackmail you"...and you are wondering if that's a red flag?!

Please consider what type of man and relationship you are looking for. You really need to protect yourself better from dating twunts!

Ok, what the hell is a foot job???

I assumed, like a handjob but with feet. Won't be trying it anyway, so won't be able to enlighten you, sorry.

Really, thanks for all the top advice.

Told him I don't want to talk to him, got a message back 'I wanted to ring you, you don't love me any more'

Have turned the phone off

When you wank him off with your feet.

He likes talking about sex with a virtual stranger, which means he is selfish in bed-that's a definite fact

I'm not sure what the logic for this is.

Of course it is. What a simpleton!

You've done the right thing. Tbh, my friends say POF has a lot of men like this. Fitness singles is a good one. If you like to keep fit

Now you know you can give it a go tonight! Spice things up a bit.

Ha yes! Because feet are soooooo attractive.

You could combine the foot wanking with pilates, for a win-win situation.

I just keep thinking 'Hobbit Porn'.
I don't know if that's an actual thing, though.

Send him this image of 'your' feet & say yes, I'd love to meet up

mardypants - do you not think you're being a tad fussy?

Good luck with your search, am so glad to hear you didn't meet him.