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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

how long should good sex take???

119 replies

stopusingmynicknames · 20/07/2013 18:16

That subject got you reading!

Have just slept with internet chappy, who informed me immediately prior to having sex that I should look forward to five hours of undiminished pleasure. I pointed out that five hours of it wouldn't, in my humble opinion, be particularly pleasant, but rather bloody painful, and in the end I gave him about two hours and then feigned sleep...

Anyway, it got me thinking. How long do you girls and boys think a good shag should take???

OP posts:
nowahousewife · 20/07/2013 18:43

Sounds exhausting! Two hours is far too long let alone five hours! Unless it's a daytime shag I need my sleep and certainly do not want to be kept up half the night shagging. Half an hour tops including foreplay, but then we have been married for over 20 yrs!

stopusingmynicknames · 20/07/2013 18:44

missbopeep no, i'm very,very far away from being 14!
Good foreplay, for about half an hour, and then banging away...
I take everyone's point about stop-start sex being good (but even 5 hours of that???), but this was continual penetration.

OP posts:
headlesslambrini · 20/07/2013 18:46

Was he after your Yoni? More importantly, did he find it?

nowahousewife · 20/07/2013 18:48

Continual penetration?! For an hour and a half! No wonder you got your shopping list doneGrin.

swallowedAfly · 20/07/2013 18:51

yes five hours of that. god yes to five hours stop starting. if you've only just started seeing this guy and find sex tedious and tiresome and have clearly mismatched libidos then i think it's time to say goodbye. it'll only get worse.

personally i can go eons without sex but once i do have it i go into nympho mode and could have it ten times a day. clearly if i got with someone who wanted a ten minute shag once a night and found sex tiresome it wouldn't be the makings of a good relationship. for you it's vice versa but the same conclusion.

swallowedAfly · 20/07/2013 18:53

and obviously it depends on whether they are actually good in bed and whether you have gotten to the point of really enjoying sex rather than seeing as something to be given and gotten through. ten years ago i'd have probably responded in the same way as a lot of people are on here because whilst i liked getting head and snogging etc penetration seemed a chore. that has really changed for me though thankfully and i now really love sex and have a good intuition for who is going to be great to make love to and who would be a pointless bore.

sorry probably wtmi.

LittlePeaPod · 20/07/2013 18:53

I thought Op meant stop start sex... Dear god two hours continual penetration... Arrrggggg. Shock

Was it continual Op? I don't blame you for pretending to be asleep...

LittlePeaPod · 20/07/2013 18:54

Please ignore my previous post just saw your note above Op...

missbopeep · 20/07/2013 18:55

sounds as bad as giving birth.

LittleSporksBigSpork · 20/07/2013 18:55

Ouch, my partner once went almost an hour continuously with a long-last condom once, I told him never to do that again. My hips hurt thinking about it.

Good sex, for us (married 10 years), usually takes 45 mins to an hour or so including foreplay with about 15-20 minutes at the end being humping away.

Dirtymistress · 20/07/2013 18:57

You should tell him that it was....shite. Else he will subject some other poor woman to a dreary afternoon of humping when you have moved onto a man who knows what he is doingGrin I could have sex all day (if someone would take the kids out) but it wouldn't involve dp's cock taking up permanent residence in my fango.

MadeMan · 20/07/2013 18:59

Five hours would be like watching snooker after a while. No surprise that Sting goes on for hours, hardly the most exciting person in the world; probably talks about rainforests throughout the whole session.

I just like to get on with it. Job done!

Heartbrokenmum73 · 20/07/2013 19:01

I want more info from Swallowedafly please on what she can spot in a good/bad potential shag! Ready with a pencil and paper here to take notes for future reference...

ouryve · 20/07/2013 19:02

Oh gawd, I'm often bored after 5 minutes, even if it's really good!

ImperialBlether · 20/07/2013 19:10

OP, is this guy Scottish by any chance? If so I think I know him! (Not in the biblical sense, thank god.)

Twinklestein · 20/07/2013 19:14

Any man thinks he knows 'what women want' is bound to be shit in bed... what a presumptuous tit.

Send him on a course OP. (On what I'm not sure - dog training?)

SelectAUserName · 20/07/2013 19:32

An hour and a half of continual penetration??? Jeez, I'd need WD40 to get my hips moving again.

OP, if one of the positions was doggy, could you not have grabbed an interesting magazine and had a quick flick through while he was banging away?

Lweji · 20/07/2013 19:33

I'd dump anyone who told me prior to sex that it would last 5 hours, or 5 min or any time at all.

Good sex lasts as long as you want it and feels right.

Chopsypie · 20/07/2013 19:39

Urgh. I like an hour at most, including foreplay. After a couple of orgasms I get supersensitive so would have to make him stop. Provided you were actually having orgasms that is.

ihearsounds · 20/07/2013 19:46

The type to say right we will be fucking for 5 hours, would be told to fuck off elsewhere by me.

I like being spontaneous. Adds to the appeal. Laying/standing/kneeling thinking I will be doing this for x amount of time is a massive turn off.

How long for good sex depends. Sometimes a quickie hits the right spot. Sometimes you want it slow. How long we fuck for I don't know as I generally don't watch the time.

stopusingmynicknames · 20/07/2013 19:49

selectausername when I was on my back I did at one point find myself checking if my nails needed another manicure!

No, I didn't orgasm. I think it was the thought of five hours that put me off.

OP posts:
Ragwort · 20/07/2013 19:50

Shock Five minutes is more than enough for me.

Are you meeting him again?

liquidstate · 20/07/2013 20:05

dear lord! 2 hours of that. 45 mins at most for me and I get sore after 20 mins of penetration. Once we went on for longer and I told DH to give me a break for a few mins as my hips were locking up...

I think there was an episode of Secret Diary of a Call Girl where one client was taking forever so she stuck her finger up his bumhole to speed things up. Perhaps something to consider?

internationallove985 · 20/07/2013 20:08

The longest and best sex session I had was about 5 hours in a hotel room. I had countless orgasms.

The worse and quickest session I have ever had was on Wednesday evening. He came in less than a minute x

internationallove985 · 20/07/2013 20:10

The longest and best sex session I had was about 5 hours in a hotel room. I had countless orgasms.

The worse and quickest session I have ever had was on Wednesday evening. He came in less than a minute x
However I suppose its quality not quantity.