Crotch grabbing, jelly nailing, double-quick portions and man parts floating in a pear tree...dating thread 33 survived Christmas so bring on NYE!

[OhLittleTownofWesternWind]

Here we are!

I looked at the dating website out of interest (snug married ? Abd lolled at one woman called "Always laughing" who looked pretty grim faced in the bio

Plus why do people wibble on about where they've travelled to? And about walking to pubs and on the beach. Dullo

Enjoy Long walks in the country, also traveling (usu. with pictures of the pyramids), love nights out but also snuggling on sofa with a DVD. Like spending time with friends.. Looking for someone funny, attractive, honest. No liars or cheats.

cliche after cliche

But who would want a woman who was always laughing? I'd think she had a screw loose, tbh!

The beach must be fucking crowded

With all the sunset gazers!

I hate all those cliches too, but if I had to put the truth in my profile, it would be something like:
'weirdo loner, inveterate exercise addict seeks convenient arrangement for sex, dislikes travelling, hates small talk prefers books to people '

doesnt sound very friendly now does it

Mercury, that made me chuckle! Tis a little of my own truths too

Agree. DVD thing common. Just spent 20 mins on illicit encounters. Very odd.

Ooh. Just found a colleague on one website.

One woman on IE was chuffin hilarious.
Words to the effect of " don't tell me you're athletic when you're a stone overweight".

Hey my dating mates! My first post on Thread 33.

My dating advice is: enjoy it, if not fun stop, don't take anything personally, (there are a lot of fucked up people out there), treat everyone gently and respectfully, be careful but make sure that you dive in and have fun

You need skin like a rhino and self esteem like teflon.

VelvetSpoon, yeah I hope so. Last contact was him saying we should arrange something, me agreeing and suggesting NYE but afternoon/evening for coffee or a quick drink (he only works til 2pm so should be do-able) and no reply so far. That was xmas eve though so I'll give him another day or so before I give up and wander off!

Juliette and OWW thank you so much, things are calmer today, possibly dad said something. Stepmom was having a go at him too, striking out in all directions like a maddened reindeer, but they seem to have made it up. The plan is to head back Saturday visiting other family on the way, so two more days to go. I have packed up most of my stuff so I can make a quick getaway - if it all gets too much I will invent a crisis meeting at work. Brother is here providing some solidarity but he goes tomorrow. However so does stepsis who is stepmom's Mini-Me and tends to band together with her and make life more difficult.

There is no way on God's earth I am ever staying this long again. Two or three days are usually okay, a week is a bit of a strain and longer than that is asking for trouble. Next year I'll arrive Xmas Eve and leave as soon as I decently can.

Thanks everyone for the dating tips, reading with interest! I don't feel like meeting anyone new at the moment and will be so busy at work for the next three months that I think I will just concentrate on that but come the spring I expect to start dating again and it will have to be OD as opportunities in RL are few and far between.

Bant Laughed at the idea that 'first rule of the dating thread is don't talk about the dating thread'!!

I think my problem at the moment is that OD no longer feels like a sweetie shop to me. It feels more like the pound shop. When you glance at the window from across the street it looks all bright and colourful and you think there are going to be some great wee hidden gems. But when you get inside it all just feels cheap and depressing. Which is why I'm on the sofa.

My real profile is pretty accurate but would also include occasionally grumpy. It's the what I'm looking for that would reveal it all

When I say intelligent, I mean it. I know no one thinks they are stupid but really, if you don't know what an avocado is you are unlikely to be able to cope with me*

I want a man who likes sex. Really likes sex, and likes women. Everyone says they like sex, but some people are actually not that bothered.

If you think a woman has an obligation to shave her legs, that being gay is a sin and that racist jokes are ok, we will not get on.

*While we are at it, referencing the okc questions the moon is not bigger than the sun. Same goes for your penis.

Juliette, perhaps you need to say that you want a man who really likes and is bothered who he has it with!

likes sex, that should be.

Juliette, re men who like sex, i agree but I'd add that I'm looking for a man who truly enjoys sensuality and is physically affectionate rather than one who is only interested in his own sexual gratification

i do realise this is an all too common lament!

Angel I'm pleased to hear it has calmed down a bit. A lot of people go to a lot of trouble traveling to spend C with people who are not nice to them. At some point, it just has to stop. Remind yourself you are going to unavailable keeping it short next year.

Unfortunately yoga too much Coffee is not my problem .. Well Mr Cheeky cannot change his on call for Hogmanay so bang goes that plan .. I am (possibly unreasonably) pissed off with it .. He promised we would meet up over the hols and now says he is having to work or be on call .. He did suggest Friday but I have DD then .. So instead of enjoying lots of Coffee I will be stuck with a bunch of smug marrieds looking at me pityingly to bring in the bells (And the first anniversary of the spkit from ex ) Disappointed doesn't begin to cover it

and intelligence is relative, i mean, however smart i think i am there's still going to be a whole swathe of people compared to whom i'm a bit dim:o

i suppose you mean that you're not interested in someone who is not intellectually on your wavelength?

Mercury I totally agree, that is exactly what I mean by 'really likes sex', a man who revels in it. Good sex for me is is loving all aspects of it, being openly sensual without shame, being able to communicate, ots of affection and touching without assumptions being made and of course Imperial, likes sex with me and makes sure he shows it.

Totally agree with Mercury and Juliette.

Happy Boxing Day all. Loving your top tips. Not sure I can add much more, but I have benefited from your wisdom over the last few months.

Just taking a break from family stuff. I opened my present last night from Sugar Daddy, which made me giggle. Lots of in jokes. He really is lovely. I am just turning into a soppy git. Hold me back.

Mercury yes intellectual wavelength is spot on. I sometimes miss common sense things that are obvious to other people but I do need to be able to talk about anything of interest whether it is banal or esoteric without getting a blank look or the classic 'what are you on about'. I'm comfortable when I feel I am on a similar level with someone. It's just more fun, more banter, more depth of understanding, more common ground. It's not about formal education, it is about being able to 'get' the things I find important and for me to respect and hopefully 'get' theirs.