Archers thread #149: This is not a drill, it’s a plot device. Here’s hoping for Stella-r rows in Ambridge. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think George Grundy's bantz make him a great laugh and totally harmless to women, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks for title suggestions - @FallonsNewCoat started us off with Drilling down OR What’s the drill?: So many jobs hanging in the balance - what’s planned for Adam, Stella, Freddie and horrible George?, @OverArmour's suggestion was ‘Drilling down on less than Stella-r performances and who will be a pig in muck’ and @TeenDivided contributed the laserdrill focussed Lets drill into plot holes and hope George gets his comeuppance. I went for a bit of all of that. The phrase at the back of my head, which I am very pleased to have tracked down, was from one of my favourite film franchises where the character Conklin says in Jason Bourne's memory This is not a drill, soldier. We clear on that? This is a live project. You are go. Training is over. Training is over. Well, that's us, troops. Training is over, discussing The Archers is a live project, and it's our job to drill down into all aspects of what we hear.

On the last thread, people were discussing how unrealistic the portrayal of mental health problems is on TA. I wholeheartedly agree, but I suppose they don't feel they can tackle long-running slow burn storylines that often. They made a great effort with Jack Woolley's Alzheimer's. Other than that, I don't recall anybody having a recurring illness that's been portrayed realistically (and actually that goes for physical conditions as well). Most things clear up and are hardly mentioned again. Sticking just to mental illness, Pat had depression after John died, Mike Tucker had a bad bout of depression, so did Elizabeth. Helen's ED may or may not be about to re-appear, but nobody's mentioning it. Ben's rapid-onset depresssion recently led to a psychotic episode but now he's fine, not least because he got prompt, skilled and appropriate treatment on the NHS, unlike most of the UK. This is one area where I feel they shouldn't even attempt it if they can't do it in a way that reflects the reality of what most of us experience, for ourselves and our loved ones.

Anyway, with that off my chest - over to you!

parents with epilepsy don't get their kids taken away. they aren't babes in arms any more.

henwee comes to an age now where he would google about finding his bio father.

Jack is at school. No reason why he couldn't have access.

It might be supervised due to the risk of abduction but epilepsy or similar wouldn't be a bar normally. My cousin's little girl was trained to dial 999 and grandad if Mummy fell over or wouldn't wake up from the age of two. She had a speed dial set up, and had correctly called an ambulance before she was old enough for school.

"A tenner says tonight’s giggles lead to a Burns bump"

Oh, surely not? Someone in the Archers must understand contraception!

It seems likely that Fallon does, unless they have been having no sex for the past however many years they have been married.

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime Your mouth to God's ear.....

Ooh! I didn't see that coming from Ron!

I'd love to go to Eddie's race. There's a cluster of church and village hall fetes round here tomorrow, I'm crossing my fingers for ferrets....

Poor old discarded Lee.

For the record, I think they'll separate under the strain but get back together again eventually.

We were right about Ron () claiming unfit parenting but we didn't foresee the other bit.

I know it's all a bit late now but have never seen how Tom and Lee's ill-judged intervention justified Helen's. By this I mean her criticism of them. She's no better than they are.
Of course I can see the SWs want to spin this one out over the silly season.

God, Helen was bloody awful today.

There used to be ferret racing at some of the agricultural shows I went to in the 1980's. My favourite part!

I like Eddie's idea for incorporating humans...

Yes Eddie's ideas were great! Joe would have been proud.

So the scene is set, the custody battle is back on and Knob (or Ron) is well and truly back in their lives. Personally I'm finding it all feels a bit contrived - firstly the Tom and Lee intervention and secondly Helen's email and meeting (I mean just why would you do any of those things when you have a non-molestation order in place?), but I can see why both of these things needed to happen to set the wheels in motion again for the plot. I'm not quite clear about Miles' involvement. I don't really remember much about him from the previous storyline yet suddenly here he is ringing up Helen like Knob (Ron's) righthand man/Helen's old friend and I have no recollection of him being either of those things.

I can't see why a meeting was needed for Rob's lawyers to say that he wasn't dropping anything, or indeed why Helen's lawyers agreed to it, or why Helen and Lee needed to be present. Surely if you know your client has been abused and the subject of coercive control by her ex, you would be hyper-vigilant to prevent any further direct abuse of her, even via an online meeting?

And why would Miles even have Helen's mobile number? Who gives their contact details to their abuser's brother, FFS?

RobRon versus Lee will be more one sided than if I challenged Serena Williams to a quick game of tennis.

It'll be akin to a cat playing with a particularly stupid mouse.

Rob is a master manipulator who has had years to plan and prepare for this. Lee is a nice guy with a penchant for highly strung women.

She might have given it to him in the first flush. I have my ex-BIL’s mobile
number. After a good ten or twelve years since he divorced my SIL.

RobRon versus Lee will be more one sided than if I challenged Serena Williams to a quick game of tennis.

I liked this analogy! I suspect I may well use it in future- you have a great way with worlds @AlexCabot

Absolutely re the lawyers @Kiwano! And has no one advised or even suggested to Helen that the courts usually grant at least some level of contact to fathers, even when there's evidence they've abused children, never mind their mummies?

I mean I'd understand if she'd been told that and was still saying "No way, no how!!" but there's been no hint of it. Or that anyone else at Bridge Farm knows this.

She also needs to be told that she risks being portrayed as the obstructive parent, playing out her hatred of the man she stabbed via her son(s).

There's a lot of heartache ahead. Unless they veer into unrealism again.

She'd be advised to bring rape charges for a start. Yes, that's why they've had her mention the rape. Good.

This storyline is annoying me because Helen and her family could not be handling this any worse. Including Helen! Imagine going into that meeting without telling your lawyer about going to see Rob and the seizure. Utterly stupid and ridiculous.
helen is going to have to allow contact in exchange for Lee escaping charges. Will she do it?
agreed also regarding the very high likelihood that Rob will get contact. This is what her solicitor will be telling her FFS!

I think she must have rung him from the hospital while doing her vigil over Rob; that would mean he had her number from that call. He might have been listed as Rob's next of kin or something.

She won't have had his number from during her marriage, because she never met Miles; Rob disliked him, back then, and Helen's only contact with Rob's family was his mother coming to Ambridge, occupying the spare room that did not before then exist at Blossom Hill Cottage, and making her life a little hell for her while she was pregnant.

The mystery is how she knew it was Miles who was ringing her: did she enter his number and name into her phone rather than just ringing him, so she could call him again to find out how Rob was, or something? And if so, why hasn't she tried doing that to ease her mind about the seizure and the MRI and the rest of it rather than spending her time saying that she wished she knew, wished she could find out, and so on?

I thought from the conversation beforehand that she had told the lawyer about it?

I'm not surprised if she's getting hefty bills, she's giving the lawyer three times as much work as it could be if she just exercised a bit of sense and followed advice.

Re Stella being a lesbian I remember feeling a frisson when her and Pip met. Did anyone else get this?

More and more it looks as if Lee will be sloughed off and disposed of.

Perhaps, once his ex finds out what’s happened she’ll forbid him from ever seeing his daughters again while he’s involved with Helen.

Or maybe he’ll realise he needs to cut his losses immediately - the Bridge Farm Archers have already ruined most of his life.

Where are the synopses? I'm sure there was a conversation when Stella was dithering about going to this wedding because it seemed such a bad time to be away from the farm, and Ruth was encouraging her to go. And I think one element was that someone was going to be there who Stella fancied.