I sort of got Oliver talking about holding Caroline on his knees, and don't understand why not being religious has anything to do with it, the ashes are what's left of them in the world. When DD and I went to collect my DH's ashes, the crematorium folk referred to them as him (by name). We were inwardly
but supposed that their training had led them to this being the best way, just as we were led to a little room, though we'd been rather expecting it to be like picking up the dry-cleaning.
Anyway, back to Oliver. What a splendidly acted encounter with the Grundys, and his range of emotions over these last few episodes has been faultless.