Worried about summer born

[Kidsdeferralsummer]

I have a bright summer born DD, who we didn't defer and is starting Year 1. We had the opportunity to repeat reception at a different school (as i looked into CSA starts) but decided not to because she seems to be doing well academically in Reception ( was extended etc). Socially she seemed OK, has a couple of closer friends but still would be nervous at playgrounds for example when I take her to them and soemtimes says she has no friends at school. 1-1 playdates and small groups she does well and is very confident.

I am now having a huge huge worry that we should have let her repeat reception since the opportunity was there, even though she is already reading chapter books and has a high maths aptitude..I keep reading online about the statistics, and people saying that summer borns will struggle all through GSCE, summer borns never catch up etc and can't help but worry that I have subjected her to more stress through her schooling years by virtue of being younger.

This is esp as we are in a 11+ area so my husband and I will look to have her do 11+, if she is also keen, which means she will be among the youngest.
. My husband and I both did well at school and in uni.

Any tips please for 1) how to support a summer born at school, 2) how to basically get over this worry and not project it to my daughter? I am not sure if we can even repeat reception now at this stage as that school spot is now gone.

Thanks in advance.

IME the girls are more advanced than the boys on average and her lack of age will be easily offset by that. Female Summer Babys don't seem to struggle much.

In terms of the 11 plus... You could argue it either way. Maybe an extra year in school will help, or maybe she'd get bored and mentally drop out.

Personally, I think you've done the right thing moving her into year 1.

I don’t have a summer born child or any tips but my dc’s best friend passed the 11+ and gained 3 x As at A level and they were born on 31st August. They’ve only just turned 18 and will be going to a good RG uni. They also did well at GCSE’s with a load of grade 9s.

As you can see being a very later summer born child did not affect their educational ability.

Being summer born might actually give her an advantage with 11+ as often they age standardise the scores.
It sounds as though she’s bright and repeating reception would be boring for her. It’s understandable to worry as a mum but she sounds like she’s thriving.

When I looked at the data other factors such as socioeconomic status, sex (summer born boys have more challenges than girls), EAL, ethnicity all had an impact and often considerably more so than summer born status.

Involved, educated parents will mitigate a huge amount of the concerns around summer borns. It sounds like shes doing well academically which is testament to that.

I don’t have a summer born and my eldest isn’t due to start school until next September. However, this is something I’ve started thinking about because we are considering moving to a country where the school system means he’d actually be one of the youngest in the year.
I think you have to really bear in mind that everything you are reading online is based on statistics. Yes, there is evidence that age on starting reception has a statistically significant impact on academic outcomes. But this doesn’t mean that every summer-born child will struggle. It seems from your comments like your daughter is thriving rather than struggling. I hear you are a bit worried about her socially, but is it possible that it’s just her temperament- that she has a preference for small groups and one to one interactions, just as many adults do and it would be the same if she repeated reception?

I understand your worries about summer borns needing to catch up. I have a bright but summer born DD, she didn’t really read or write until Y1. It took her until about year 9 to fully catch up I think. The main thing was to keep her confidence and interest going, as it’s very easy to get disheartened when all your friends are doing better than you. She spent her childhood thinking that her brother is much cleverer than her - he really isn’t, it just felt like that because he was born earlier in the school year. Anyway it all worked out in the end, she is now at uni having achieved all A star at GCSE and 3x A star and an A at A level.

What I don’t understand is what your DD needs to catch up on? What makes you think she will struggle through GCSE? What extra stress is she under? She is surely ahead of the curve if she is reading chapter books and has a high maths aptitude? Or is it just the social aspect you are concerned about?

FWIW I think you have done the right thing, it would be hard to repeat reception when she’s doing so well, she would probably be extremely bored and obviously very different from many of her peers, which might not help her socially anyway.

I would look at enrolling her in a couple of clubs / activities if you haven’t already, to develop her social skills and friendship group. It’s good to have friends from elsewhere I think, takes the pressure off at school. So maybe rainbows, a sport, a music class, craft, dance, coding, cooking, whatever she might enjoy that’s available in your area really.

Had 2 summer borns, DS2 and DD. If you are invested and she is academicaly able, there is no need to worry.
Ds2 (now 21) got 10 9s at GCSE and 3 A stars and an A at A level is is doing medicine. Born late August. He was v bright and we often joke that he decided to come 3 weeks early to avoid being bored at school! Boredom is the worst thing. Leads to misbehaviour etc.
DD did just as well and is a late July bday and studying abroad on a full sport scholarship. She played elite level sport and her birthday did disadvantage her there as she was physically less developed then her team, the vast majority of who were born Sept to Dec. But keeping down a school year won't help with that.

My children aren't summer born but my dd who is December born is bored stiff in her year, if I could move her up I would. If you've got an end of reception child reading chapter books then she doesn't need to repeat reception.

There’s also a lot of evidence that long summer holidays can undo the learning that kids do over the year. If she stays on top of learning - and that could be by doing eg one week of maths or science camp each summer, which are designed to be fun - she’ll counter that loss and stay on top
Plus as she’s young completely keep her off screens and shape a habit of reading and reaching for books to stay amused. I suspect in the next cohort, screen time will be the big differentiator, not month of birth

I’m coming from a different place to many
on here as I have personal experience of this. Our late August born son entered school at CSA so just turned 5. He is now in year 8 and we have never regretted our decision. He definitely thrived in primary school and has always been very comfortable socially amongst his peers, in addition to doing very well academically. I think I would have repeated reception if given the opportunity. He is now very grateful that he will be the first of his friends to be able to drive, drink etc. rather than having to wait until the end of August!!

I have 2 summer born DC neither were defered. DD is about to take the 11+ in our area they will apply an age standardisation to the scores if the younger candidates have statistically lower scores.
Your DD sounds like my DS with a high aptitude for Maths as well as good at reading. Also socially he wasn't great, spending time with DD and her friends at school. He preferred Year 1 as he liked the more traditional sitting down to learn something rather than free flow play based of reception. This actually helped the social side as he had to work in set groups rather than reception where he could just move to another area.
If she is doing well academically then deferring her would probably make her bored. I don't think deferring would help on the social side possibly make it worse as she would no longer be with the friends she has made. As a PP has said I would join a club Rainbows, Squirrels or a sport.

My twins are end of August babies so I know the worry but I am confident we made the right decision. By year 4 they’d caught up and honestly, they were never that behind after reception. Some dc started writing their name before school but my two didn’t. They got there. SATS were significantly above average and now it’s year 11 and GCSEs. They won’t be getting 9s but I don’t know that keeping them back a year would have resulted in that either - most dc don’t get 9s. I’m hoping for some 6s and maybe a couple of 7s but 5s in the subjects they hate. That’s enough for what they want to do.

dtd1 is an amazing singer and dtd2 is a fabulous dancer, they’re creative, funny, sensitive, empathetic and have personalities that mean I certainly worry less. GCSEs do feel stressful but they were for my eldest too and she’s a February baby.

I deferred my Summer born son so he started Reception just after turning 5.

We didn’t do it for academic reasons though, only for social/emotional development ones.

In Years 1 and 2 he joined the school year above for maths and English (the cohort he ‘should’ have been in) as he was so academically able but from a social point of point it was very obvious he was a lot younger than the majority of the class.

He’s now in Year 4 and you can tell he’s one of the oldest in the class (to look at) and he’s excelling academically and he’s so confident and outgoing, and although I have no doubts that he would have been academically fine if he was in the school year above I don’t think he’d be as confident or enjoy school as much because I think being the youngest in the class would have had an impact on his confidence levels and friendships etc (which is what our concerns had always been and what we’d wanted to avoid).

He plays football for a team that is the age group above his school year (so the cohort he should have been in) and again, when watching the team at social event it’s very obvious in their behaviour, social skills, resilience, mannerisms etc) that my son is the youngest in the team and he is a little bit sidelined at times. I can’t quite put my finger on the ways it’s obvious he’s younger, but you can just tell. Whereas in his current school cohort of being in the Year below, he fits in perfectly amongst his Peers.

He primarily hangs around with the children who are the oldest in the year so I do think there is a natural gravitation pull that occurs between children who are at the same level of emotional/social development and maturity and I am very glad he’s the oldest in the yesr and not struggling from that angle, as opposed to being the youngest and potentially having difficulties.

When you read all the research although it does talk about the potential academic restrictions of being a Summer born there is also a large focus on the detrimental effect it can cause children by
not being socially and emotionally ready for school at just turned 4 and the impact that can have on their behaviour, their character development and the secondary impact of how that can then influence their academic achievements.

As has been said though, the research also says that boys are much more likely to be affected than girls so your daughter does have that protective factor.

The school have spoken to us SO many times about moving our son up a year to the cohort he ‘should’ be with based on his academic ability but we have always said no, as that was never our primary reason for deferring him.

We have always been very open with our son about the fact he was deferred and he has always been involved in discussions about moving him up a school year but he has never wanted to. If at some point in the future he does want to then we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Thank you all for the messages! She doesn't come across like she needs to catch up at the moment on anything in particular, it's just she comes across young! And there's lots of forums and stats online about summer borns struggling. I think I am just worried esp as I had the opportunity to defer. She is happy in herself but it's just so difficult making a decision that could have an impact years down the line.

She does a couple of activities which she enjoys, I'm not sure about the social side of that as they just attend the class and that's it. I will make more of an effort to make friends with parents from those activities and see if we can build a social circle there too.

I’m summer born and never struggled at school and have a PhD
Most kids don’t need to be held back, it can actually be worse for a bright child to be bored with work that’s too easy and children that are too young

Also imagine when she gets to 17/18 and all her peers are going off to university and she has another year of school to do

The 11+ near me standardises the scores by age to account for this. You also need permission to sit it out of cohort. I'm sure it is usually granted, but another hoop to go through. I think you made the right choice for your child. On average more summer borns (usually boys) struggle, but your DD isn't. You have a bright DD who sounds ready for the increased structure of year 1. In your case it sounds unnecessary to repeat the year, plus the upheaval of a new school.

I have a summer born DD. She has never struggled academically and didn’t have any more social issues than anyone else in her cohort. She’s just completed a postgraduate degree.

Stats and forums don’t really help when deciding what’s best for an individual though. Obviously, not all summer born children struggle and it would be crazy to hold back a child who is ahead academically because stats and forums say that some DC her age find it difficult. She doesn’t! So there’s really no need to worry that many are behind for a while, when yours clearly isn’t. This is not a borderline decision imo, or even 50/50, she’s doing well, she will be fine!

Also - sports-wise, there is research now that suggests it’s not actually advantageous to be one of the older ones in the group. The littler DC have to develop all kinds of skills to remain competitive amongst their bigger rivals, and then when they do catch up physically, they are the ones with the advantage. Just looking at tennis for example, Federer, Djokovic, Nadal, Murray, Alcaraz and Sinner all have birthdays after Easter. The challenge is to keep DC going through the years when they are competing against bigger and stronger kids.

Where do you live? they age standardise the 11+ here which helps summer norms.

I have 2 summer born DDs. It definitely does affect them. DD1 is very bright and did very well academically in the end (1st from Imperial College) but did not pass the 11+. The primary school also did not enter them for the higher tier maths SATS paper, which they deeply regretted because in year 6, they went from being bottom of the top maths set to the top of it.

My advice would simply be firstly to do everything you can to encourage reading - that is the most important. Secondly, do everything you can to encourage curiosity, so take them on walks and talk about the plants and wildlife you see, take them to museums and have guided tours, teach them to cook (not just cakes), watch TV together and discuss, play chess and other board games, learn to play the recorder. Thirdly, always stay physically active.

I have one very end of August child and one born the start of September. The September one struggled far more at school in the early years socially than the August one. She was the oldest girl in the year by four months (just the way the allocations fell) and in a minority in being a younger sibling. She was into Mia & Me and unicorns whilst her classmates were still watching Peppa Pig. She found the work easy and was often bored. Things didn’t improve until Y2/3.

The other one was the last in her class to be able to learn how to skip, and her pencil grip took a while to develop but academically it would have been a disaster if we had deferred her. She was so ready for school.

We live in Bucks and sat the 11+. They actually age adjust the scores to take into account the month they were born so there’s no disadvantage. Both passed with flying colours.

The August one got amazing GCSE results, is predicted 4 A stars at A-level and has big plans for universities.

I always say, defer for a reason, not simply because you can. Your daughter not being a social butterfly might just be her personality and absolutely nothing changes if she does repeat a year.

Mine are both summer born and started reception with their peers. They never had any problems, despite DS having ADHD. They both excelled academically.

DD has always struggled more with friendships/socially but as she has matured I can see that is a personality trait. DS was always super popular.

I don’t think you should make a big deal of it tbh.

If this had been before Receotion... it would be easier to say yes, defer.

But moving her now will likely just make her bored and unhappy.

FWIW... my summerborn seemed young until about Yr4. Now, in Yr11, shes a lot more mature and responsible than a lot of her peers (including onrs already 16).

I really don’t get all the concerns that a child who is just days older than an early September born will be bored. Schools will usually push more capable kids anyway.