MIL been unreasonable - now I have to buy a cot

[kirstenn123]

I need advice on buying a cot - I'm completely clueless 😂

At the start of pregnancy , I looked at cots & was overwhelmed at the prices !
MIL suggested we have the cot that is in her house , that she called a "family heirloom"
My OH was raised in this cot along with other family members
At first , I said no as I wanted a new one but due to covid & furlough & decreased funds , I eventually gave in & accepted it
My OH also stated all we needed to buy was a new mattress & he was sold on the idea of raising his son in the cot he was raised in - I asked him if I could pain / modify it & he said yes

Fast forward to 30 weeks pregnant ( MIL is due to drop it off when we have the family seeing times on Xmas week ) my OH spoke to her the other day & asked what kind of material it was so he could buy the correct paint - she's told us we are not to paint it
OH says he's still gonna paint it , but his mother can be a little petty when it comes to arguments , & I'm not her biggest fan already

We're gonna wait until the January sales , does anyone know any websites / shops etc I can buy one from
I've looked on Argos / way fair & the common ones but there too pricey

Thanks !!!

I think Ikea do cots.

Do you mean a cot or a crib?

We had ours in a bedside crib for 6/7 months which was around £60. Then a cot in her own room from then on. I guess point being you don’t need a full on wooden cot right now - a new baby would be lost in it anyways. Your better getting a crib for your room (baby should really be with your for the first while anyway but not preaching) if you can which aren’t expensive and I’ve seen second hand ones for £30-40.

I'd try gumtree if funds are tight and just buy a new mattress. I got a boori cot from there (800 quid new) and just bought a new mattress.

@Teacaketotty we've got a side crib for our room , it's for when he's old enough to move into the nursery
So I don't need one ASAP , hence why we're waiting for January sales

@kirstenn123 ah sorry okay makes sense. I got ours from Argos in a 25% off sale and it turns into a toddler bed too. I would just save over the next few months if you are tight for money and grab a sale bargain in January if you can. We did a lot of shopping around but Argos were the cheapest - try very?

I'd look at second hand sites, or ikea if you're near one.

Have you checked ebay or Facebook marketplace? Immaculate condition ones tend to come up for £30/40

I got mine from IKEA - the gulliver one - I like it because it's the only cot I could find where one side came off completely to make it into a bed when baby is old enough. It's usually only cot beds which are a lot bigger that have this function

Think my IKEA one was £55 - took me 20 mins to put up and looks nice

Not sure why you’re giving your MIL a hard time??

I got my cot and changing table from gumtree for £50. They're lovely.

IKEA do nice cribs for a good price.
I got my DD's white sleigh cotbed from Wayfair with a sprung mattress for £150 and free delivery in their sales.
Facebook market place is also a good one although check how much the mattresses cost. Sometimes it works out better to buy a new cot and mattress combined than just buying a mattress on their own.

Join your local Next Door group or Freecycle and ask if anyone has one they're not using any more. There will be someone looking to get rid (I am but you may not be near me ) and then you'll just need the mattress.

I also don't get what MIL has done wrong! Wouldn't most people not want you to paint over a family heirloom?

You can't just take someone else's stuff and paint it! Presumably she might want other members of the family to use it in the future, she'll want it back in decent condition.

I agree with trying gumtree or Facebook marketplace; you an usually get a good bargain and then just buy a new mattress.

Depending on how old your OH is the safety features on the cot maybe very different to safety requirements used on cots now

I’d get something newer off fb marketplace/ gumtree
Some of the older ones don’t meet standards when it comes to width between the bars etc.

We've got a Stokke Sleepi, £550 or £34 on eBay... either way DD didn't want to sleep in it for a loooooong time and still prefers our bed.

I wouldn't paint an "heirloom"

I don't think your MIL has done anything wrong here? She offered you something. You declined. Your situation changed so you went back and asked for it. She agreed. You want to paint it. She doesn't.

It's an heirloom so she likely will want it back or passed to another family member when you have finished with it.

Ikea do cheap cots. Cost wise I mean, not quality.

You can’t paint someone else’s cot. You sound a bit ungrateful to be honest. Just put a new mattress in your MIL’s cot.

Cots aren't that expensive, you can get one in Argos with a mattress for less than £150, so not mega money.

I'm not surprised she didn't want you to paint it ! Why are you suggesting she's in the wrong?

You won't need a cot for years anyway.
Congratulations on your imminent baby

Your MIL has been reasonable here. She doesn't want a family heirloom modified to your taste, and that is absolutely fine.

I agree with those saying gumtree/Facebook etc, people frequently want rid of their cots due to space and you can pick them up very cheaply.

We never ended up buying one. We started with a side crib, then ended up choosing to cosleep for a bit, then just loved dd to a mattress on the floor until she was old enough for it to be raised. I would start saving, but not actually buy one until you are certain you need it. That is my advice with all baby things. Set the money aside, but wait to buy because you will be surprised at what you end up needing/not using.

I had a very old family heirloom cot that one of the in-laws insisted we use. They also insisted they refurbished/repainted it as they were concerned there might be lead in the original paint
If she won’t let you paint it, you just can’t use it. Happy shopping

I wouldn’t want you painting it either. It’s not yours nor your husbands it belongs to your MIL and I assume she’d be getting it back in a few years when your baby is ready for a bed.
I think YBU here.